Phoenix Wright Kink Meme Collection, Vol. 1
Phoenix Wright Kink Meme Collection, Vol. 1
A compilation of my contributions to the Phoenix Wright Kink Meme. Stories range from silly and innocent crack, to rather... bizarre shit.
Series: Ace Attorney
Rating: R
Words: 1201 total
Warnings: Spoilers (Every game in the series), vague descriptions of sexual acts, discussion of Lemon Party.
Previously posted?: Yes (Phoenix Wright Kink Meme)
Updated from previous posting?: Yes (a few grammatical errors fixed)
Phoenix finds Mia's stash of Diego photos:
It was another seemingly normal day in the Wright & Co. law offices. Phoenix hadn't been on a case in a while, so he decided he had some time to tidy up his office a bit, and maybe take a trip down memory lane with some old files.
As he was looking through the files kept by his late mentor, Mia, he found an envelope, simply labeled, 'Diego <3'.
"...Do I even want to know?" Phoenix said to himself. He looked up at the clock on his wall. He had plenty of time for a break. "...Sure, why not." He opened up the envelope and carefully pulled out the contents. But what he saw immediately shocked him.
"Is that... oh my God..."
It was a photo of Diego, Mia's former lover, wearing nothing but a bright red speedo, flexing his muscles, one of his large hands holding his signature white coffee mug.
"Do I dare look at the next photo...?" He slowly slid the photo down to peek at the one behind it. He saw a much more modest facial expression, and thought it would be safe to look. But what he saw shocked him even more than the first photo.
"L... LEOPARD SKIN?!" he yelped, trying to lower his voice in mid-sentence, so as to not attract attention from outside, even though he knew nobody was around.
He then said to himself, his voice shaking, "Why... why am I getting hard looking at this...?"
Approximately an hour later, Maya arrived at the building, only to find the door to the office locked.
"Nick, are you in there?"
"Haah... haah... I'm, uh... uh... I'm cleaning!"
"Why's the door locked?"
"Er... It's pretty nasty! URGH! Um... Edgeworth stopped by... there was- agh! ...a party at the prosecutor's office! He was wasted! He threw up EVERYWHERE."
"Heavy drinking doesn't sound like something Mr. Edgeworth would do, Nick..."
"Just trust me on this, Maya OH GOD IT'S EVERYWHERE."
"Are you okay, Nick...?"
"I CAME EVERYWHERE! WHY, DIEGO, WHY?!"
The building fell silent for several seconds, but the silence was broken just as abruptly when Maya burst into giggles.
Gregory makes Manfred lose The Game:
The final day of Manfred von Karma's latest case was nearing a close. He was prosecuting a gentleman suspected of stealing a large amount of canned tuna from a supermarket. The man defending Von Karma's suspect was one Mr. Gregory Edgeworth.
"So you see, Mr. Gregory Edgeworth..." Von Karma snapped his finger loudly, "The police have found this burlap sack full of tuna cans, in the defendant's home! The bag is also covered in cat hair... and the defendant, Mr. Joseph Engarde, owns a cat!" Von Karma couldn't help but smirk. He thought he had just landed another perfect victory for his record.
"Objection!" Gregory slammed a hand down to his desk. "Your Honor, the evidence that the prosecution has been presenting is bothering me." He said, pushing up his glasses. "The defense has reason to believe..." he then pointed his finger at the prosecutor. "...that this new piece of evidence is faulty!"
"What?!" Von Karma banged on his desk with his fist.
"I can tell you that this is NOT cat hair on this burlap sack! It is dog hair! The prosecution has been forging evidence!" Mr. Edgeworth slammed his desk once again. "Do you think law is a game, Von Karma? People's lives are at stake every day in here!"
Game...?
No...! The Game...! NO...!!!
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Von Karma screamed at the top of his lungs, clutching his chest. This startled Mr. Edgeworth. "I JUST LOST THE GAAAAAAAAAAAAME!!!" he banged his head down on his desk. "DAMN YOU, EDGEWORTH!!!"
In comparison to the pain he felt from losing The Game, Von Karma could have cared less that he had just been caught forging evidence. From the moment he had discovered The Game at the tender age of 14, Von Karma had forgotten all about it, and as a result, had never lost The Game. Not even once. But something in Mr. Edgeworth's voice triggered a memory. A memory that had resulted in Von Karma's ultimate loss of The Game. He couldn't believe he had lost.
"I... I'll kill you...! When you least expect it! It could happen while you're unconscious! IN AN ELEVATOR! GHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!"
The audience watching the trial began to mutter amongst themselves, until the Judge slammed his gavel.
"Order! ORDER!"
After much hyperventilating, Von Karma regained his composure. "I'm okay. I'm okay." He was lying, but he saw no point in putting off the trial any longer.
"Er... if the trial may continue..."
"Yes, Your Honor."
Grossberg is one sick motherfucker:
"Mr. Grossberg?"
Mia entered her employer's office. The lights were off, though Mia could see that Grossberg's computer was left on, despite Grossberg himself apparently having stepped out.
She flicked the light switch on, calling out for her boss once again. "Mr. Grossberg, are you in here?"
It was then that Mia smelled a familiar scent. She could tell what it was by her experiences with Diego; it was semen. She then put two and two together. Oh god, he wasn't looking at... was he? Mia, growing curious, quietly turned on Grossberg's computer monitor. As quietly as she could, anyway; the monitor would always make a loud buzzing noise while starting up.
Mia was immediately disgusted at what she saw. The address bar on Grossberg's browser read, "lemonparty.com", and the page consisted only of one picture, of three elderly men engaged in an orgy.
Mia, greatly sickened, covered her mouth with one hand and clutched her stomach with the other. Then, without even thinking of turning off the monitor, she dashed for the bathroom, presumably to bow to the porcelean god. To her dismay, the bathroom was occupied. She could hear Grossberg's voice from inside. "Mia, is that you? I'll be done in just a moment."
A few minutes later, Mia, who had thankfully managed to push the contents of her stomach back down, heard from the entrance, the all too familiar sound of Diego doing a spit-take. "Oh, god!" she heard him say. Mildly amused, she wandered back to the entrance to investigate.
"Grossberg is one sick motherfucker!" Diego said with a highly amused expression on his face, one hand holding a cup of coffee, his other hand to the side of his forehead.
Apollo and his Chords of Steel:
The defense lobby rumbled at the sound of Apollo's intense voice. Kristoph chuckled at his pupil's constant shouting, as he took a pair of earplugs from his pocket and inserted them into his ears; he wanted to quietly enjoy a book while waiting for the trial, but found it difficult to do so with Apollo practicing his silly 'Chords of Steel' act during this time.
Finally, the bailiff emerged from the door. "The trial is about to start, gentlemen. What's all the commotion, anyway?"
"I saw the Gavinners yesterday and now I'm all pumped up! YEEEEAAAAHH!!" Apollo raised his fist into the air as Kristoph let out an amused sigh, shrugged and closed his book.
And now one from the in-character meme! Kristoph writes about "Phoenix and Maya confessing their true feelings to each other." It turns out to be something completely different.
The year was 2016. Will Powers, the actor famous for playing the Steel Samurai, had just been arrested on suspicion of murder. While this was happening, Phoenix Wright and Maya Fey were making out somewhere.
"MAYA! I LOVE YOU!"
"I LOVE YOU TOO PHOENIX!"
"I WANT TO STICK IT IN YOU!"
And so he did. But soon enough, he was arrested and punished severely for sexual relations with a minor. You see, Maya Fey was only 17 years old at the time.
"Oh no! Who's going to defend Mr. Powers now?" a random employee of Global Studios cried.
The most charming man you had ever seen arrived at that very moment. He was like a violet angel descending from the heavens.
"I'll take the case!" he said.
"Oh my God, is that Kristoph Gavin?"
"It is!"
Maya Fey then proceeded to tackle Mr. Gavin and wrap her arms around him. "Oh, Krissy, you're so manly!"
However, unlike Wright, Gavin is most certainly not a pedophile, so he politely turned Ms. Fey down.
By the end of the day, Mr. Gavin had completely proven Mr. Powers' innocence.
A compilation of my contributions to the Phoenix Wright Kink Meme. Stories range from silly and innocent crack, to rather... bizarre shit.
Series: Ace Attorney
Rating: R
Words: 1201 total
Warnings: Spoilers (Every game in the series), vague descriptions of sexual acts, discussion of Lemon Party.
Previously posted?: Yes (Phoenix Wright Kink Meme)
Updated from previous posting?: Yes (a few grammatical errors fixed)
Phoenix finds Mia's stash of Diego photos:
It was another seemingly normal day in the Wright & Co. law offices. Phoenix hadn't been on a case in a while, so he decided he had some time to tidy up his office a bit, and maybe take a trip down memory lane with some old files.
As he was looking through the files kept by his late mentor, Mia, he found an envelope, simply labeled, 'Diego <3'.
"...Do I even want to know?" Phoenix said to himself. He looked up at the clock on his wall. He had plenty of time for a break. "...Sure, why not." He opened up the envelope and carefully pulled out the contents. But what he saw immediately shocked him.
"Is that... oh my God..."
It was a photo of Diego, Mia's former lover, wearing nothing but a bright red speedo, flexing his muscles, one of his large hands holding his signature white coffee mug.
"Do I dare look at the next photo...?" He slowly slid the photo down to peek at the one behind it. He saw a much more modest facial expression, and thought it would be safe to look. But what he saw shocked him even more than the first photo.
"L... LEOPARD SKIN?!" he yelped, trying to lower his voice in mid-sentence, so as to not attract attention from outside, even though he knew nobody was around.
He then said to himself, his voice shaking, "Why... why am I getting hard looking at this...?"
Approximately an hour later, Maya arrived at the building, only to find the door to the office locked.
"Nick, are you in there?"
"Haah... haah... I'm, uh... uh... I'm cleaning!"
"Why's the door locked?"
"Er... It's pretty nasty! URGH! Um... Edgeworth stopped by... there was- agh! ...a party at the prosecutor's office! He was wasted! He threw up EVERYWHERE."
"Heavy drinking doesn't sound like something Mr. Edgeworth would do, Nick..."
"Just trust me on this, Maya OH GOD IT'S EVERYWHERE."
"Are you okay, Nick...?"
"I CAME EVERYWHERE! WHY, DIEGO, WHY?!"
The building fell silent for several seconds, but the silence was broken just as abruptly when Maya burst into giggles.
Gregory makes Manfred lose The Game:
The final day of Manfred von Karma's latest case was nearing a close. He was prosecuting a gentleman suspected of stealing a large amount of canned tuna from a supermarket. The man defending Von Karma's suspect was one Mr. Gregory Edgeworth.
"So you see, Mr. Gregory Edgeworth..." Von Karma snapped his finger loudly, "The police have found this burlap sack full of tuna cans, in the defendant's home! The bag is also covered in cat hair... and the defendant, Mr. Joseph Engarde, owns a cat!" Von Karma couldn't help but smirk. He thought he had just landed another perfect victory for his record.
"Objection!" Gregory slammed a hand down to his desk. "Your Honor, the evidence that the prosecution has been presenting is bothering me." He said, pushing up his glasses. "The defense has reason to believe..." he then pointed his finger at the prosecutor. "...that this new piece of evidence is faulty!"
"What?!" Von Karma banged on his desk with his fist.
"I can tell you that this is NOT cat hair on this burlap sack! It is dog hair! The prosecution has been forging evidence!" Mr. Edgeworth slammed his desk once again. "Do you think law is a game, Von Karma? People's lives are at stake every day in here!"
Game...?
No...! The Game...! NO...!!!
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Von Karma screamed at the top of his lungs, clutching his chest. This startled Mr. Edgeworth. "I JUST LOST THE GAAAAAAAAAAAAME!!!" he banged his head down on his desk. "DAMN YOU, EDGEWORTH!!!"
In comparison to the pain he felt from losing The Game, Von Karma could have cared less that he had just been caught forging evidence. From the moment he had discovered The Game at the tender age of 14, Von Karma had forgotten all about it, and as a result, had never lost The Game. Not even once. But something in Mr. Edgeworth's voice triggered a memory. A memory that had resulted in Von Karma's ultimate loss of The Game. He couldn't believe he had lost.
"I... I'll kill you...! When you least expect it! It could happen while you're unconscious! IN AN ELEVATOR! GHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!"
The audience watching the trial began to mutter amongst themselves, until the Judge slammed his gavel.
"Order! ORDER!"
After much hyperventilating, Von Karma regained his composure. "I'm okay. I'm okay." He was lying, but he saw no point in putting off the trial any longer.
"Er... if the trial may continue..."
"Yes, Your Honor."
Grossberg is one sick motherfucker:
"Mr. Grossberg?"
Mia entered her employer's office. The lights were off, though Mia could see that Grossberg's computer was left on, despite Grossberg himself apparently having stepped out.
She flicked the light switch on, calling out for her boss once again. "Mr. Grossberg, are you in here?"
It was then that Mia smelled a familiar scent. She could tell what it was by her experiences with Diego; it was semen. She then put two and two together. Oh god, he wasn't looking at... was he? Mia, growing curious, quietly turned on Grossberg's computer monitor. As quietly as she could, anyway; the monitor would always make a loud buzzing noise while starting up.
Mia was immediately disgusted at what she saw. The address bar on Grossberg's browser read, "lemonparty.com", and the page consisted only of one picture, of three elderly men engaged in an orgy.
Mia, greatly sickened, covered her mouth with one hand and clutched her stomach with the other. Then, without even thinking of turning off the monitor, she dashed for the bathroom, presumably to bow to the porcelean god. To her dismay, the bathroom was occupied. She could hear Grossberg's voice from inside. "Mia, is that you? I'll be done in just a moment."
A few minutes later, Mia, who had thankfully managed to push the contents of her stomach back down, heard from the entrance, the all too familiar sound of Diego doing a spit-take. "Oh, god!" she heard him say. Mildly amused, she wandered back to the entrance to investigate.
"Grossberg is one sick motherfucker!" Diego said with a highly amused expression on his face, one hand holding a cup of coffee, his other hand to the side of his forehead.
Apollo and his Chords of Steel:
The defense lobby rumbled at the sound of Apollo's intense voice. Kristoph chuckled at his pupil's constant shouting, as he took a pair of earplugs from his pocket and inserted them into his ears; he wanted to quietly enjoy a book while waiting for the trial, but found it difficult to do so with Apollo practicing his silly 'Chords of Steel' act during this time.
Finally, the bailiff emerged from the door. "The trial is about to start, gentlemen. What's all the commotion, anyway?"
"I saw the Gavinners yesterday and now I'm all pumped up! YEEEEAAAAHH!!" Apollo raised his fist into the air as Kristoph let out an amused sigh, shrugged and closed his book.
And now one from the in-character meme! Kristoph writes about "Phoenix and Maya confessing their true feelings to each other." It turns out to be something completely different.
The year was 2016. Will Powers, the actor famous for playing the Steel Samurai, had just been arrested on suspicion of murder. While this was happening, Phoenix Wright and Maya Fey were making out somewhere.
"MAYA! I LOVE YOU!"
"I LOVE YOU TOO PHOENIX!"
"I WANT TO STICK IT IN YOU!"
And so he did. But soon enough, he was arrested and punished severely for sexual relations with a minor. You see, Maya Fey was only 17 years old at the time.
"Oh no! Who's going to defend Mr. Powers now?" a random employee of Global Studios cried.
The most charming man you had ever seen arrived at that very moment. He was like a violet angel descending from the heavens.
"I'll take the case!" he said.
"Oh my God, is that Kristoph Gavin?"
"It is!"
Maya Fey then proceeded to tackle Mr. Gavin and wrap her arms around him. "Oh, Krissy, you're so manly!"
However, unlike Wright, Gavin is most certainly not a pedophile, so he politely turned Ms. Fey down.
By the end of the day, Mr. Gavin had completely proven Mr. Powers' innocence.