BEBE

[away_from_here]

So tonight I am out at H&M College Night at Downtown Crossing buying some sweet clothes for 20% off when I receive a text message from Dave that reads: "Call me, we need to talk". I'm busy and I don't call him. We get back to the dorm and we are hanging out with other girls on our floor and he keeps sending me text messages that are like "I'm driving around until you call". I send him one back that says "I'm socializing" and he keeps texting. This is strange because he is always the one who is like "don't talk to me on the phone you should be out making friends not thinking about me" blah blah blah (please refer to two posts prior) So I finally call him and he's like "I'm so freaked out right now, my mom went to the psychic. The psychic told her that I was going to be a dad soon, if it hadn't happened already among other accurate information" I'm just like "wow that sucks man you better be careful the next time you bang" He's not really saying anything. So I ask him to tell me how this makes him feel. He's like "well how do you feel?" I'm like fine?? He's like "well you're the only person whom I've slept with so how do you feel now?" I'm like dying laughing because THIS IS DAY 19 OF MY PERIOD. I'm like fucking antipregnant. I share this information with him, and after telling me I'm gross (the kid can't handle femaleness). He's like "you need to get that checked out". I ask him jokingly if he wants me to take a pregnancy test and HE SAYS YES. I think this is the most hilarious thing in the world so I drag Kristen braless down to Symphony Market to pick up a pregnancy test (which he is totally paying me back for, shit was expensive). Symphony conviently keeps it's pregnancy tests BEHIND THE COUNTER. I buy some fritos (a present for Kristen for accompanying me) and an Arizona and then I'm like "ahh and a pregnancy test". So we go back to the communal bathroom, I pee on the little stick (with a splash guard!) and guess what?



I'M NOT PREGNANT!

big surprise there.