Bleach fic: A Matter of Convenience
Here is the fic for my bleachbigbang, it took me a lot of effort to complete, showing I'm better at angst than humour
Title: A Matter of Convenience
Author: aviss
Pairing: Byakuya/Ichigo
Genre: Romance, humour
Warnings: None
Rating: R
Word Count: ~15.200
Summary: The war is over and it's time for the reconstruction. The new Soutaichou of the Gotei-13 has more than enough on his plate to have to deal also with cocky newly appointed Taichous and a friendship he neither wants nor needs. Not that Ichigo has ever cared for what Byakuya wants.
Beta: thief_nirina
Video: Here you can find the lovely vid silversword2010 made for it.
A Matter of Convenience
Byakuya looked at the faces staring up at him and resisted the urge to sigh. Barely.
If this was the best Soul Society had to offer, then he had his work cut for him. It was going to take an eternity to get everything back in its proper place.
He had not wanted the position, but with the death of Yamamoto-san and the appointing of Shuunsui and Ukitake to Central 46 Chambers, there had been no other viable candidates. Now that it was his, Byakuya knew there was no way to get out of this mess. And well, he needed to have Taichous, but still…
Too young, too unskilled, too rash and definitely too uncouth. And those were the good ones.
He could feel a migraine coming and had the nasty suspicion it wasn't going to be the last one.
"Henceforth," Byakuya said, keeping his voice soft and steady, every eye fixed intently on him. "I confirm the new positions in the Gotei-13"
He looked at the first person in the group, wishing he could just wipe the smug smile off her face. "Shihouin Yoruichi will be reinstated in her old position as Taichou of the 2nd Division. Soi-Fon has expressed her wish to remain as her fuku-taichou as they were before."
And hadn't that come as a surprise? Not that Soi-Fon liked to be under Yoruichi, and he didn't want to think about that, not now, not ever. But that she had been willing to let go of her power just to have Yoruichi back. Byakuya would rather Soi-Fon had held onto her pride than having to see his senpai wearing the white haori again.
"Kira Izuru will lead the 3rd Division as Taichou. He will elect a fukutaichou of his choosing in no longer than a month, or one will be appointed for him." Byakuya had no doubts Kira would elect someone suitable, the man was gloomy but intelligent and was one of the few easy choices Byakuya had.
Him and Hisagi Shuuhei. They knew their jobs, had led their respective Divisions when the Gotei-13 needed it the most, and had proven to be up to the task. Of all the new appointments, they were the ones which made the most sense.
The only ones which made any sense at all.
"The 4th Division remains, as it was, under the command of Retsu Unohana and her fukutaichou Kotetsu Isane. The 5th Division will be, once again, led by Hirako Shinji, who will also elect a fukutaichou within the month."
Had Byakuya known what he was getting into when he argued the case against the ban of the old Taichous and fukutaichous, he would have kept his mouth shut. He had been in favour of letting them return to Soul Society, if they so chose, considering the circumstances of their banishment and the injustice done to them. He had not expected them to agree so readily or to regain their positions, and having to deal with the most irritating of them was something that hadn't even crossed his mind at the time.
He should have known better.
"The 6th Division will be under the command of Abarai Renji." Surprisingly enough, this was something Byakuya was all right with. Renji was a lot of things Byakuya didn't like: he was rash, uncouth, had more brawn than brains and was always just a step away from insubordination. But he was Taichou material or Byakuya would have never agreed to take him under his command before. It was too early for him though, but he would have to learn, and learn fast. "Hinamori Momo is confirmed as fukutaichou in this division, having agreed to the transfer to the 6th. The 7th Division remains, as it was, under the command of Komamura Sajin with Iba Tetsuzaemon as his second."
Now it was when things got really nasty. If it wasn't enough having a bunch of untried and young Taichous they also had the worst of the old ones.
"Kurosaki Isshin will lead the 8th Division, with Yadomaru Lisa as his second."
Byakuya didn't want to think about the fact he was getting as subordinates some of the most stubborn, powerful and incredibly stupid Shinigami available. It seemed that Division alone would be forever lead by perverts.
"Hisagi Shuuhei will take over the 9th Division, also having a month to appoint his fukutaichou. The 10th Division remains as it was, Hitsugaya Toushirou and Matsumoto Rangiku will carry on with their duties as before." And they would be an oasis of common sense among the madness. At least Hitsugaya would be, Matsumoto wouldn't be called sensible any time soon. "The 11th Division also remains as it was, with Zaraki Kenpachi and Kusajishi Yachirou leading it." More madness, but at least this one was predictable, Byakuya just needed to stay well out of the way of Kenpachi's Division of psychos.
Byakuya looked at the next ones. It was bad enough with Yoruichi and Shinji and Kurosaki father, but it got a lot worse with him.
"Urahara Kisuke will return to his old position as 12th Division Taichou, and so will Sarugaki Hiyori as his second in command." At least Byakuya wouldn't be the only one suffering the return of the old guard.
It was better than Mayuri though, who wasn't only insane, but was also incredibly unpleasant.
He took a deep breath, the last appointment was the one he was having real problems with. With a great effort, he forced the words past his throat.
"Kurosaki Ichigo will command the 13th Division as Taichou, Kuchiki Rukia will serve as his fukutaichou." And wasn't that the most explosive combination one could imagine? He gave that Division a month, though he wasn't certain if it was going to be his sister killing her Taichou or Kurosaki murdering Rukia. It was either that or a wedding.
And that was what he got right at the time Soul Society needed more stability: a bunch of morons responsible to restore the Gotei-13 to what it was before the War.
Someone out there really hated Byakuya.
…
The upside of having Kurosaki Ichigo in Soul Society was that now Kenpachi tended to pester him instead of using his spare time to annoy Byakuya. It was something of an improvement, being able to stroll through the Divisions without wondering from which direction the attack would come, or if he was likely to be late for an appointment thanks to that bothersome brute.
The downside was, well, having Kurosaki Ichigo in Soul Society. The living, breathing, and utterly annoying reminder of Byakuya's worst mistake and more than deserved defeat.
He could remember, now, that fight with a kind of detached sense of shame. It had not been Kurosaki Ichigo who had beaten him, Kuchiki Byakuya. He himself was the sole responsible for the defeat with his pride and underestimation of his foe. He had not had all the facts, or he would have never allowed Kurosaki to surprise him during the fight. Byakuya had believed he was up against a mortal boy, someone with borrowed powers who knew nothing about pride or honour.
Now that he knew who Kurosaki Ichigo was, and more importantly, who his father was, Byakuya would never again be defeated by him.
But that was beyond the point, since Kurosaki and he wouldn't be in a position to prove that again. Not that Kurosaki didn't try. Or that Byakuya didn't feel like wringing his neck at least twice a day.
Like now.
"Byakuya are you listening to me?"
For one, being appointed as Taichou had not improved Kurosaki's manners.
"You will address me as Kuchiki-soutaichou, Kurosaki Ichigo," Byakuya said for the umpteenth time since the day Kurosaki had taken over his position. It didn't seem to penetrate his thick head that he wasn't a Substitute Shinigami anymore and now he had duties to tend to as well. "And no, the fact that Zaraki-Taichou burst into your Taisha and dragged you out for a fight is no excuse for your tardiness. You have to report on time with the tasks assigned to your Division, no excuses."
Kurosaki glared at him with the same fire Byakuya remembered from the war, crossing his arms in front of his chest in a clearly belligerent move. He was still a child, that much was clear. The rest of the Shinigami, regardless of the body they had, were at least a century old or close enough to make no difference. Kurosaki Ichigo had died in the mortal world as a seventeen years old boy, and had gone straight to Seiretei as a fully trained Shinigami with a Division waiting for him.
Byakuya could understand if he found the bureaucracy and staggering amount of paperwork the Taichous had to suffer confusing or annoying, God knew he did, but he wasn't going to cut him any slack. Kurosaki Ichigo had, in spite of his youth, been appointed to lead a Division. And he had accepted, so he needed to deal with the consequences.
And besides, if Kurosaki thought he had it tough, it was only because he had not seen Byakuya's workload.
"That's what I'm trying to say," Kurosaki snapped, still glaring. "It's not just Kenpachi, Ikkaku also follows me around, and my idiot dad keeps trying to surprise me or beat me senseless, and Yoruichi sneaks around just to annoy me, not to mention Shinji and Urahara and--"
"Enough, Kurosaki," Byakuya cut him off, fearing he might end up laughing at the distress so clear in Kurosaki's voice and expression. "You are a Taichou, you need to behave as such. If you are unable to uphold your position--"
"You're the boss, Byakuya! Get them out of my hair or I won't have time to fill out your stupid paperwork!" Kurosaki interrupted him, his face flushed and his eyes burning with rightful indignation.
And he still didn't address Byakuya properly.
Byakuya stood up from his chair, leaning forward and staring at Kurosaki straight in the eyes. "I might be the Soutaichou now, Kurosaki Ichigo," he said slowly, as if he was talking to a moron or a Kurosaki. "But the Gotei-13 is not a kindergarten, nor am I a teacher. It is not part of my duties to teach my subordinates to behave like adults. You have your own responsibilities and should be able to deal with any distraction that might come your way. Do not come to me with such feeble excuses again, am I being sufficiently clear?"
Kurosaki looked as if he wanted to say something to protest further, but for once in his life, decided to keep his mouth wisely shut. "Yes, Kuchiki-soutaichou," he finally mumbled sulkily.
"Is there anything you want to add?" Byakuya asked after a few heartbeats when Kurosaki remained standing in front of his desk silently, just glaring darkly at him.
"No."
"Good. I expect all the completed paperwork in my Division by tomorrow afternoon. Do not make me call for you again. You are dismissed, Kurosaki-taichou."
Kurosaki shot him one last mutinous look before turning on his heel and leaving the office. Byakuya stared after him, finally allowing his mouth to curl into a soft smile.
There were other perks to having Kurosaki in Soul Society after all. Seeing him suffer like this wasn't that bad.
…
The scheduled visits to the 12th Division were one of the worst duties Byakuya had now to attend to.
It was easy to ignore the Research Division while he was only responsible for the 6th, now he had to keep track of the progress of all of them and maintain the balance of the tasks assigned to each one, compensate for unscheduled assignments and other developments appearing, and deal with the head of each Division.
Byakuya felt as if he had not rested for more than an hour in the month since he was elected as Soutaichou, and was beginning to wonder how Yamamoto-soutaichou had managed to survive the position for millennia. Probably because his Taichous weren't a group of uncooperative barbarians, or maybe just because he was old and used to it.
It was no wonder Shuunsui and Ukitake had jumped at the chance of going to Central 46 Chamber instead of taking the position.
He wasn't in the most forgiving of moods, and the argument he had with Urahara about the use of forbidden materials for research and the sheer stubbornness of the man had not improved his disposition in the least. Urahara may be older and the greatest expert in his field, but he also was the one ultimately responsible for Aizen's greatest weapon and had spent a century living among mortals. He needed to learn his place in the Gotei-13 if he had any hope of keeping it. Not that Byakuya would be sorry to see him go, but with Kurotsuchi out of the picture, someone had to lead the Research Division and for some reason, scientists were in short supply lately.
Byakuya was looking forward to finishing his work and going home. A quiet evening with a book, a nice dinner and a long, leisure soak had never sounded so appealing. He just needed to drop the stack of files ready for delivery to Central 46 chamber and he'd be free to rest for the first time since he assumed his position.
The first thing he noticed when he opened the door to his office was that his fukutaichou's desk was occupied.
Maybe in other Divisions it wasn't a thing worth of notice, but being as Byakuya had had no time to find a fukutaichou, it jumped straight at him. It wasn't as if Byakuya didn't want a second in command, he did. Or as if he wanted to double the already impressive workload he had, he didn't. But it was impossible to find the time to check the files and interview the possible candidates for the position, and it wasn't a position anyone could fill, when he barely had the time to carry on with his normal duties and find a couple of hours rest before he keeled over.
It should have been a priority, Byakuya was well aware of that, but the lack of prospective candidates and the lack of actual time to do it were a bad combination.
And besides, even if he had found a fukutaichou, Byakuya was certain he would have never picked one with that hideous shade of hair.
Kurosaki looked up at the sound of the office door slamming shut, a frown of concentration on his features before his eyes moved down to the file in his hands, almost as if there was nothing wrong with his presence there. Byakuya could feel a vein throbbing in his temple.
"Kurosaki," he said, his voice sounding strained to his own ears. He should have gone straight home instead of stopping by the Taisha first. "What are you doing in my office?"
There was an instant of silence, stretching between the two of them and laden with incredulity and irritation. And then Kurosaki looked up from his file again, staring straight at Byakuya as if the answer was the most logical thing in the world.
"My office is currently invaded by morons and psychos, and my house is in no better condition. It was you who insisted on all this bloody paperwork done on time, Byakuya, and you have a spare desk. They won't follow me to the Soutaichou's office."
"Because," Byakuya felt the need to point out, gritting his teeth. "They still have a modicum of respect for their positions and mine, something you obviously lack."
Kurosaki had the nerve to shrug and turn his attention back to his file. "Yeah, we've already gone over that. Now, let me finish this so I can turn the paperwork in on time and go home to kick my father's face in."
Byakuya wondered if Central 46 Chamber had a spare position to fill, or if they would hold him accountable for the murder of one of his Taichous. Probably, yes. With that avenue closed to him, he decided the best course of action was just ignoring the idiot at his fukutaichou's desk and going home.
If he got into an argument with Kurosaki Ichigo here and now, there was no telling when he'd be able to get some decent sleep.
With a last cold look at Kurosaki, Byakuya deposited the folders in his hand on his desk and turned to the door again. "I expect every single thing to be in the exact position they are now when I arrive in the morning," he said opening the door. "And all your late paperwork to be properly filled."
…
In hindsight, maybe giving in without a fight the first time Kurosaki had barged into his office had not been the best idea. He had not believed Kurosaki would be so brazen as to try again once he knew it went against Byakuya's explicit orders.
Obviously Byakuya had grossly underestimated Kurosaki's stubbornness and disrespect.
"Is there a reasonable explanation to justify your repeated presence in my office, Kurosaki-taichou?" Byakuya asked coldly the moment he entered his office to find that, once again, Kurosaki Ichigo had taken over his fukutaichou's desk and was calmly doing his paperwork there.
Kurosaki looked up and shrugged. "Urahara wants to run some tests." That was all the explanation he gave, turning his attention back to what he was doing prior to Byakuya's arrival.
Byakuya looked at him blankly, resisting the impulse to release his zanpakutou and rip the nuisance to shreds, literally. The sheer amount of blood he would need to clean afterwards was the only thing preventing him to.
With a much put upon sigh, Byakuya closed the door after him and moved straight to his desk. At least his things were still neatly arranged, the tall piles of files to check and approve before being sent to their assigned Divisions covering the entire wooden surface.
"Urahara always wants to run some tests," Byakuya said, taking his seat and grabbing the first folder from the pile. "I don't see what kind of relation that has with your unwanted presence in my office."
Kurosaki dropped the file and stared at Byakuya, his eyebrows trying to crawl into his hairline. "Urahara wants to run some tests on my hollowification," Kurosaki enunciated slowly. "And from the look of it they didn't seem painless or fun. I would have gone home, but Kenpachi was standing guard there on the off chance I had a spare minute, not bloody likely with all this fucking paperwork to finish, and he could rope me into a fight."
Byakuya was feeling distinctly unimpressed at the explanation. "That still fails to justify why you are here, Kurosaki. Surely you have friends, or at least someone who doesn't find your presence irritating."
Kurosaki shot him a disgruntled look. "Well, Renji had a date so his place was off limits today."
"And my sister won't have you either? I was under the impression she liked you," Byakuya said, surprised. Unlikely as it was due to their characters, Rukia seemed to be fond of the idiot. And Kurosaki had risked his life for Rukia, so he must consider her a friend as well as a subordinate.
The mere thought that Kurosaki wanted to inflict his presence on Byakuya, who was clearly less than pleased with it, when he had people who voluntarily suffered him was baffling.
"She also had a date," Kurosaki said, one of his eyebrows arched up.
It wasn't difficult to read the meaning of that and Byakuya made a mental note to pay a visit to his old fukutaichou and have a friendly chat with him. He wasn't going to warn him off Rukia, Byakuya was aware of his sister's character and knew if someone was going to need help in that relationship it wasn't she. Still, he had a duty as an older brother and he was going to fulfil it.
"Is there any way I can rid myself of your company without resorting to violence, Kurosaki?" Byakuya asked after a few seconds silence, almost resigned to the fact that he was about to spend an afternoon with Kurosaki Ichigo.
"No," Kurosaki said confirming his guess. "So the sooner you let me get on with my work the sooner I'll be out of your hair."
Byakuya gritted his teeth. "I work in silence, Kurosaki," he warned in his coldest voice before turning his attention to his own paperwork. "If you make any noise, it will be Senbonzakura answering it."
"Got it."
For the next couple of hours the only noise inside Byakuya's office was the rustling of paper, the folders moving from one side of the desk to another as the files were completed. He wouldn't say he wasn't aware of Kurosaki's presence in the room, he was. He was deeply conscious of the other's steady breaths and movements. Byakuya could feel every time Kurosaki looked up at him only to resume his work after a second, could hear him rotating his neck when the tension began to accumulate after an hour of continuous writing.
Most surprising of all was the fact that Byakuya didn't mind his presence after a while, just ignored him and dedicated his entire attention to finishing his own work. With some luck he might have all the paperwork ready for delivery sometime in the next decade, and the fact that Kurosaki was able to work in peace and not annoy him with stupid questions or inane chatter was as much of a shock as it was a blessing.
"Done." Kurosaki broke the silence after an eternity, standing up from his chair and stretching his body. Byakuya looked briefly at him before returning to his current task. "God, this is boring! You need help to finish all that crap, Byakuya?"
Tempting as the idea of inflicting his work on someone else was, there was no way Byakuya would accept help from Kurosaki Ichigo. "If you are finished with your work, Kurosaki-taichou, please remove yourself from my office now," he said, not sparing another second to see how his words were received. "And don't presume to come here uninvited again."
"Suit yourself."
The sound of the door closing was the only indication of Kurosaki's departure. The silence, once again, was disturbed only by the rustling of paper as Byakuya finished his work for the day.
…
The Taichou meetings had become their own circle of hell for Byakuya, who lately felt more like a kindergarten teacher than the Soutaichou of the Gotei-13, no matter how much he had denied it before. He had serious doubts that Yamamoto had ever had to deal with the same kind of insubordination and utter foolishness as he was faced with every single time all his Taichous were in the same room. For one, Ukitake and Shuunsui were still alive, not a pile of ashes decorating some corner of Seiretei.
The topic of the day, apart from the selection of new candidates for the divisions and the scheduling of Taichou visits to the Academy, seemed to be 'harass Kurosaki Ichigo'. By the look if it, it was the preferred hobby of at least four of his Taichous.
Byakuya had the sudden feeling he wasn't going to get rid of Kurosaki's presence for a long, long time.
"Leave me the fuck alone!" Kurosaki was shouting in Urahara's face, his hand clenched around the hilt of his zanpakutou, his eyes narrowed and burning with fury. It would have been a more impressive sight had he not been hiding behind Rukia. "And keep that thing away from me!"
Urahara had a strange contraption pointed at Kurosaki, who kept edging away from him inch by inch. Had this been Kurotsuchi, Byakuya would have already intervened. It wasn't good form to experiment with fellow Shinigami and using a Taichou as a test subject was forbidden. He could remember Yamamoto-soutaichou reading Kurotsuchi the riot act in a meeting for an experiment done on a fourth seat, had it been a higher rank Byakuya had no doubts they would still be there listening to it.
But this wasn't Kurotsuchi, it was Urahara, and insane and annoying as the man was, Byakuya was certain he didn't actually intend to experiment on Kurosaki. At least no more than he had already had when the boy was mortal.
No, Urahara was doing it just for fun and if Kurosaki had not been too busy shouting and trying to stay away from whatever Urahara had in his hand, he'd have been able to read the expression on his torturer's face.
He'd leave him to suffer a few more minutes, but Byakuya had a mountain of work waiting for him and knew the meeting was going to be long enough as it was.
He entered the room regally and saw all movement stop, the tension on Kurosaki's shoulders relaxing a fraction as everyone scrambled to their usual places as Byakuya strolled to his place at the back of the room. He turned to face them, all eyes fixed on him.
"The first order of the meeting is the Academy recruitment," Byakuya said once silence had completely settled. "We're severely understaffed in most of the divisions, so the Academy has been speeding up the training to have recruits ready as soon as possible."
The first one to speak was Hitsugaya, meeting Byakuya's eyes calmly. "How long have the trainees been in the Academy?" His cold voice carried clearly in the almost silent room, everyone darting looks at him before their attention returned to Byakuya.
"Most of them have been in training for less than a year. The older students helped during the war and those who survived already have positions in different Divisions."
"Won't they be too green to work in a division?" Kurosaki Ichigo said, his brow furrowed.
Byakuya nodded, perfectly aware it was too soon for most of them. "Yes, but we are at peace now. They can finish their learning while they work. No mission should be so dangerous now a trainee Shinigami can't deal with it."
"With all due respect, Kuchiki-soutaichou," Hitsugaya spoke again, frowning. "I'd rather not have a half trained subordinate. We already have a huge backlog of work to sort through in my division and we have little to no time to spare teaching a group of kids who probably won't even have Shikai. The 10th Division formally renounces to their recruitment right at this time."
He had expected that much from at least a couple of the old divisions. They were the ones coping better with the new situation, probably because most of their members had been together for a long time.
"The 7th Division also renounces, Kuchiki-soutaichou," Komamura said in the silence which followed Hitsugaya's words.
Byakuya's eyes moved to the other side of the room in time to see his sister prodding Kurosaki on the back, shaking her head firmly when Kurosaki looked back at her. Kurosaki frowned, nodding and she shook her head harder, glaring at him. Byakuya stared amused at their silent communication. Finally Kurosaki narrowed his eyes at Rukia who scowled darkly and crossed her arms over her chest mutinously.
"The 13th Division also renounces, Bya--Kuchiki-soutaichou," Kurosaki said, a spot of colour rising on his checks at his slip.
Byakuya was glad the idiot had corrected himself in the last second, though Yoruichi's smirk told him it had not gone unnoticed. The last thing he needed was for the rest of his subordinates to know he was unable to make one pesky Taichou address him properly.
"If this is all, the rest of the divisions will proceed to the Academy in a week's time and select the candidates."
They went through the rest of the points of the meeting by rota, nothing really interesting to discuss in any of them. Byakuya could see how some of the attendants became restless after a while, Kenpachi shooting challenging looks at Kurosaki Ichigo, who pointedly ignored them. Lisa had cuffed Kurosaki Isshin twice in the back of his head for trying to peek down Matsumoto's cleavage and the average temperature in the room had dropped by several degrees. Renji was making eyes at Rukia, who was also ignoring him and there was a bruise on his face that suggested the previous date might not have been as successful as he might have hoped. Byakuya reminded himself of his due chat with his ex-fukutaichou.
"That is all for today," Byakuya said, watching as Kurosaki Ichigo tensed the moment Urahara's hand fell on the contraption he was brandishing before, getting ready to flee. "Just one more thing before the meeting is adjourned. While we encourage friendly sparring sessions between divisions and cooperation in whatever might be needed, we don't condone the harassing of one of our own or his unwilling participation in experiments."
He hoped everyone read the meaning of what he had said without the need to spell out Leave Kurosaki Ichigo alone so I can regain the sole use of my office.
There were a few scowls at his last pronouncements, especially from Kenpachi and Kurosaki Isshin. Byakuya ignored them.
"Meeting is adjourned; you can go back to your duties."
They filed out in something resembling order; though it didn't escape Byakuya's notice how Kurosaki Ichigo was the first one to leave. He didn't have much hope of his order being followed, but at least most of them would behave for the next week.
…
"You know, Byakuya, I think I've finally figured out why only the 11th division goes on fighting rampages."
Byakuya looked up from his work at the sound of the voice, not surprised in the least to find Kurosaki Ichigo entering his office with a disgruntled expression on his face. His hair was mused, though how it was possible for Byakuya to tell with those wild spikes was a mystery, and there were some rips in his shihakusho and haori. Kurosaki closed the door after him, careful not to slam it, and then moved to the fukutaichou's desk and plopped on the chair, resting his head back and staring at the ceiling.
He supposed he had to be grateful he had got a fortnight reprieve from Kurosaki's presence, but Byakuya was feeling too annoyed at the fact that Kurosaki was back inside his office for it to register.
"Don't you know how to knock, Kurosaki-taichou?" he said bitingly, his voice cold and low.
Kurosaki looked at him. "Yes, but would you have given me leave to enter?" he retorted with an arched brow.
"No." There was no need for Byakuya to deny the obvious.
"So there, I didn't bother."
It was useless to argue against the stubborn idiot, Byakuya had known that for a long time. Resigned, he pointedly ignored Kurosaki and went back to work.
The silence lasted for a whole two heartbeats, Kurosaki sighing loudly before he opened his mouth to deliver unwanted insight about his opening gambit. "It's the paperwork, all those fucking files you make us write and re-write until our hands cramp," Kurosaki said, irritation oozing from every single word as if Byakuya was personally responsible of the Gotei-13 rules. Byakuya would have gladly pointed out that the rules had been there before any of them were alive, but that would mean acknowledging the idiot, and he wasn't in the mood for that. "If I release my sword I have to fill the S-24 form, twice for each occasion, explaining the use and need of the release."
Byakuya was well aware of that rule, and had complained about it bitterly to his grandfather when he was still a student. He didn't complain anymore, he had just learned to hone his skills in such a way a release was unnecessary. Most of the other Taichous were the same, it figured Kurosaki would be the only one having trouble with it. How did he managed, when his sword was constantly in Shikai was a complete mystery.
"And that's not mentioning that if I ever go Bankai I will be swamped under paperwork. Form S-25, S-26 and B-345, all of them comprised of 47 copies, for each member of Central 46 Chambers plus the Soutaichou. This is fucking torture!"
"Kurosaki, if you've come here to complain," Byakuya said, fearing he was going to be listening to the idiot's rant for a long time if he didn't interrupt now, "you are in the wrong place. I'm not interested in your opinions or company."
Kurosaki shot him a dark look, his brow furrowed in a scowl, and then picked some papers from the desk and a pen and started filling them. "No, I'm not here to complain. I'm here to fill the damned S-25, S-26 and B-345 because Shinji thought two weeks without trying to kill me were enough, and he went all out on me on my way back home. I'm just grateful there are no forms to fill for using my mask or I'd still be here writing them next year."
Now, there was an idea. Byakuya considered for an instant how many files would be needed to justify the release of an inner hollow and how to present the proposal to Central 46 Chambers, if only to be the first one to see Kurosaki's face the next time he did it. However, that would mean having Kurosaki there while he filled them so maybe he could just let things stand as they were.
"You should do that in your own office," Byakuya said, more because he felt he had to than actually expecting Kurosaki to heed his words.
"I know," Kurosaki said looking up at him with a smirk. "But that would deprive me of your charming company, and you of mine."
Byakuya felt a flush creeping up his face, his eyes narrowing in annoyance. He didn't like being made fun of, and was about to tell that to Kurosaki in no uncertain terms when he beat him to it.
"And yeah, I remember you work in silence, so I'll just get on with it and shut up."
Byakuya kept glaring at Kurosaki for a minute as the silence settled around them before going back to his own work. He had to concede that round to Kurosaki.
…
"I am surprised, Kurosaki," Byakuya heard himself saying before he was conscious of speaking; frowning at himself once he realized he was the one engaging Kurosaki in a conversation. They had been working in silence for close to an hour, only the soft scratch of pen on paper and the occasional annoyed sigh falling from Kurosaki's lips heard in the room. It was surprising, the feeling of normalcy he lately had when Kurosaki was in his office, it had been some days since the last time he had serious entertained the idea of killing him just to be rid of his presence. "You seem to be calm and accepting of my sister's relationship with Abarai-taichou."
Kurosaki looked up at him, puzzled. "Why wouldn't I be?" He seemed sincerely confused at the question, and Byakuya wondered if he had misread the situation.
He wished he had kept his mouth shut, but there was no going back either. "You were willing to die for my sister yet it doesn't bother you she has given her affections to someone else." It was a statement, not a question. Whatever Byakuya had assumed before about his sister's relationship with her Taichou, he could see now they were mere friends. That only made it harder to understand the lengths he had been willing to go to save her before.
The frown etched on Kurosaki's features cleared suddenly, an expression of incredulity taking its place. "Wait, you don't mean--" he began, stopping suddenly and shaking his head. "No way, you're insane! Rukia is my friend."
Yes, he could see that. "Would you die for any of your friends?" Byakuya couldn't help asking, unable to understand him.
Kurosaki shrugged, as if the question wasn't anything out of the ordinary. "I guess, thought Rukia is special; she was the first one who believed I could protect everyone. She was the first one to grant me the power to do it." Kurosaki had a kind of far away look, almost melancholic. Maybe Byakuya hadn't been that far off the mark, at least considering Kurosaki's feelings. "But, well--she's Rukia!" Kurosaki finished, an almost disgusted expression on his face.
"Are you suggesting my sister is undesirable, Kurosaki-taichou?" Byakuya asked, offended on Rukia's behalf.
"No!" Kurosaki protested. "She's cute, I guess--for Renji. They're perfect for each other, and well, she's nice, when she's not trying to kill me, and a good friend, and, well--" he was babbling, a bit of colour creeping on his cheeks and Byakuya raised an eyebrow amused in spite of himself. "But she's a girl!"
And maybe he had been way off the mark, Byakuya realized at the way Kurosaki's jaws snapped shut at the last pronouncement, his face beet red.
They returned to their paperwork in silence, and by the time Kurosaki finished and left the office, Byakuya had already decided he wasn't going to think about it anymore.
…
Byakuya had tried not to think about Kurosaki's words. He really had.
Kurosaki, and anyone else in Soul Society for that matter, was free to like whoever he chose. It wasn't an issue, not like it might be in the living world. Take reproduction out of the equation and people were a lot more open-minded about things like same sex couples. Ukitake and Shuunsui were a clear example of that, even Yoruichi and Soifon, much as it pained Byakuya to think about his senpai in any kind of relationship. So he didn't see where Kurosaki's embarrassment at not preferring women came from.
Still, it was too much information for Byakuya's tastes. He regretted ever asking Kurosaki about Rukia; it wasn't as if Byakuya really cared about it, he had just been curious because it made no sense to him. Risking so much for someone who wasn't his family and then seeing her in someone else's arms, and not feeling anything but happiness for them.
But well, Kurosaki had always been an odd one, and Byakuya didn't need to think about him. Not with the amount of things, important things he had to consider already. Like the latest possible candidates to fill the position as his fukutaichou.
Those were the things he needed to keep in mind, not whether Kurosaki's admission meant that it was Renji he had feelings for. Byakuya didn't care, and he had no idea where that thought had come from.
He frowned, glaring at the top of Kurosaki's head as if he was the one to blame for Byakuya's distraction. And well, he was.
"Something on your mind, Byakuya?" Kurosaki said, looking up straight into Byakuya's narrowed eyes.
"No," he snapped curtly, moving his eyes back to where they should be, perusing the candidates files.
He could practically hear Kurosaki shrug and go back to his work, Byakuya reading the information on the file with a poorly concealed moue of distaste. Who had found these candidates? They were completely inadequate for the position, and their level of power insufficient for even a seated officer in another Division.
He closed the folder and resisted the urge to toss it on the floor.
"Is it Renji, then?"
The words escaped his lips without leave from his brain, Kurosaki's head snapping up to stare at him in shock. "What?"
"You don't disapprove of their relationship," Byakuya continued, wondering what arguments his treacherous mouth was about to form. "Yet you still spend your time here, in spite of my continued efforts to make you leave, instead of with them, where you are welcomed. It stands to reason that you don't want to see them together. If it's not Rukia, then it has to be Renji."
Kurosaki's face changed expressions so quickly it was impossible for Byakuya to read them all, from shock to disbelief to a kind of amusement, until he finally barked a laugh.
"You've got it so wrong, Byakuya," Kurosaki said, chuckling. "Renji is perfect for Rukia, hell, he's been in love with her since they were brats--and that in Seiretei means a shitload of years. I'm happy for them, and I don't mind seeing them together at all. Renji's a friend, nothing more and nothing less."
"Why do you keep pestering me, then?" Byakuya questioned, feeling that his grasp on logic was slipping. Besides hiding from every single psycho working in the Gotei-13 at current, there had to be a reason for Kurosaki's continued presence in his office. He had other places to go to, Byakuya didn't understand why he kept returning there.
"Well, I like seeing them together, that's true. But they are in their honeymoon phase." And it was wrong seeing anyone referring to his sister's and Renji's relationship as a honeymoon, especially since Byakuya knew it was probably more violent than the last war. "They need space, and you honestly don't want to be around them when they get loving with each other."
"Yes, it might get very dangerous," Byakuya deadpanned and was amused to see Kurosaki cracking a rueful smile. He felt his lips trying to curl into an answering smirk and smothered the expression before it was fully formed.
"Don't I know that!"
They went back to work in silence after that, the endless writing on the page blurring after a while. It was incredibly boring, he had to give that to Kurosaki, and some of his taichous needed to go back to school and learn how to write. Kenpachi's efforts alone were enough to give anyone a migraine.
"It still doesn’t explain what you're doing here, Kurosaki," he said without looking up, blinking tiredly and trying to focus on the report. Who was this one from? Kurosaki Isshin, and it looked like chicken scrawl badly done by a two years old. Byakuya decided to assign him the next clean up mission in Hueco Mundo just out of spite.
And probably his son would be grateful enough to leave Byakuya alone for a couple of days.
"Well, Byakuya," Kurosaki said, and something in his tone made him look up at him. "I wouldn't be able to enjoy your company anywhere else. I'm done for today. Need any help with those? No?" He finished before Byakuya had the chance to reject his offer. Kurosaki stood up and went to the door, casting one last amused look at him. "As you know, since you were the one to give me that mission, I'll be away for the next couple of days. Try not to get too bored without me."
Byakuya stared dumbly at the closed door for a second before he shook himself from his stupor. Maybe he should give the Hueco Mundo mission to a different Kurosaki.
He was getting too cocky for his own good.
…
Byakuya didn't get bored.
He really didn't. It was impossible to get bored with Kenpachi following him again, and the mess up with the test subjects he had to sort out in the 12th. Not to mention the reports about some high class Hollows being seen in Rukongai, or the latest insanity from the Shinigami Women Association, which now was more annoying than ever thanks to Lisa joining it.
So no, he wasn't bored, if anything he was even more exhausted than before and bemoaned the lack of a fukutaichou to help him cope with the paperwork. The day only had so many hours, and Byakuya didn't feel like spending some of them writing down the latest screw up from his idiotic subordinates.
That was the reason he went straight home without stopping by his office during the days Kurosaki was out on the mission.
He was tired, he needed a rest.
And it had nothing to do with his empty office.
Nothing at all.
…
Continues here
Title: A Matter of Convenience
Author: aviss
Pairing: Byakuya/Ichigo
Genre: Romance, humour
Warnings: None
Rating: R
Word Count: ~15.200
Summary: The war is over and it's time for the reconstruction. The new Soutaichou of the Gotei-13 has more than enough on his plate to have to deal also with cocky newly appointed Taichous and a friendship he neither wants nor needs. Not that Ichigo has ever cared for what Byakuya wants.
Beta: thief_nirina
Video: Here you can find the lovely vid silversword2010 made for it.
A Matter of Convenience
Byakuya looked at the faces staring up at him and resisted the urge to sigh. Barely.
If this was the best Soul Society had to offer, then he had his work cut for him. It was going to take an eternity to get everything back in its proper place.
He had not wanted the position, but with the death of Yamamoto-san and the appointing of Shuunsui and Ukitake to Central 46 Chambers, there had been no other viable candidates. Now that it was his, Byakuya knew there was no way to get out of this mess. And well, he needed to have Taichous, but still…
Too young, too unskilled, too rash and definitely too uncouth. And those were the good ones.
He could feel a migraine coming and had the nasty suspicion it wasn't going to be the last one.
"Henceforth," Byakuya said, keeping his voice soft and steady, every eye fixed intently on him. "I confirm the new positions in the Gotei-13"
He looked at the first person in the group, wishing he could just wipe the smug smile off her face. "Shihouin Yoruichi will be reinstated in her old position as Taichou of the 2nd Division. Soi-Fon has expressed her wish to remain as her fuku-taichou as they were before."
And hadn't that come as a surprise? Not that Soi-Fon liked to be under Yoruichi, and he didn't want to think about that, not now, not ever. But that she had been willing to let go of her power just to have Yoruichi back. Byakuya would rather Soi-Fon had held onto her pride than having to see his senpai wearing the white haori again.
"Kira Izuru will lead the 3rd Division as Taichou. He will elect a fukutaichou of his choosing in no longer than a month, or one will be appointed for him." Byakuya had no doubts Kira would elect someone suitable, the man was gloomy but intelligent and was one of the few easy choices Byakuya had.
Him and Hisagi Shuuhei. They knew their jobs, had led their respective Divisions when the Gotei-13 needed it the most, and had proven to be up to the task. Of all the new appointments, they were the ones which made the most sense.
The only ones which made any sense at all.
"The 4th Division remains, as it was, under the command of Retsu Unohana and her fukutaichou Kotetsu Isane. The 5th Division will be, once again, led by Hirako Shinji, who will also elect a fukutaichou within the month."
Had Byakuya known what he was getting into when he argued the case against the ban of the old Taichous and fukutaichous, he would have kept his mouth shut. He had been in favour of letting them return to Soul Society, if they so chose, considering the circumstances of their banishment and the injustice done to them. He had not expected them to agree so readily or to regain their positions, and having to deal with the most irritating of them was something that hadn't even crossed his mind at the time.
He should have known better.
"The 6th Division will be under the command of Abarai Renji." Surprisingly enough, this was something Byakuya was all right with. Renji was a lot of things Byakuya didn't like: he was rash, uncouth, had more brawn than brains and was always just a step away from insubordination. But he was Taichou material or Byakuya would have never agreed to take him under his command before. It was too early for him though, but he would have to learn, and learn fast. "Hinamori Momo is confirmed as fukutaichou in this division, having agreed to the transfer to the 6th. The 7th Division remains, as it was, under the command of Komamura Sajin with Iba Tetsuzaemon as his second."
Now it was when things got really nasty. If it wasn't enough having a bunch of untried and young Taichous they also had the worst of the old ones.
"Kurosaki Isshin will lead the 8th Division, with Yadomaru Lisa as his second."
Byakuya didn't want to think about the fact he was getting as subordinates some of the most stubborn, powerful and incredibly stupid Shinigami available. It seemed that Division alone would be forever lead by perverts.
"Hisagi Shuuhei will take over the 9th Division, also having a month to appoint his fukutaichou. The 10th Division remains as it was, Hitsugaya Toushirou and Matsumoto Rangiku will carry on with their duties as before." And they would be an oasis of common sense among the madness. At least Hitsugaya would be, Matsumoto wouldn't be called sensible any time soon. "The 11th Division also remains as it was, with Zaraki Kenpachi and Kusajishi Yachirou leading it." More madness, but at least this one was predictable, Byakuya just needed to stay well out of the way of Kenpachi's Division of psychos.
Byakuya looked at the next ones. It was bad enough with Yoruichi and Shinji and Kurosaki father, but it got a lot worse with him.
"Urahara Kisuke will return to his old position as 12th Division Taichou, and so will Sarugaki Hiyori as his second in command." At least Byakuya wouldn't be the only one suffering the return of the old guard.
It was better than Mayuri though, who wasn't only insane, but was also incredibly unpleasant.
He took a deep breath, the last appointment was the one he was having real problems with. With a great effort, he forced the words past his throat.
"Kurosaki Ichigo will command the 13th Division as Taichou, Kuchiki Rukia will serve as his fukutaichou." And wasn't that the most explosive combination one could imagine? He gave that Division a month, though he wasn't certain if it was going to be his sister killing her Taichou or Kurosaki murdering Rukia. It was either that or a wedding.
And that was what he got right at the time Soul Society needed more stability: a bunch of morons responsible to restore the Gotei-13 to what it was before the War.
Someone out there really hated Byakuya.
…
The upside of having Kurosaki Ichigo in Soul Society was that now Kenpachi tended to pester him instead of using his spare time to annoy Byakuya. It was something of an improvement, being able to stroll through the Divisions without wondering from which direction the attack would come, or if he was likely to be late for an appointment thanks to that bothersome brute.
The downside was, well, having Kurosaki Ichigo in Soul Society. The living, breathing, and utterly annoying reminder of Byakuya's worst mistake and more than deserved defeat.
He could remember, now, that fight with a kind of detached sense of shame. It had not been Kurosaki Ichigo who had beaten him, Kuchiki Byakuya. He himself was the sole responsible for the defeat with his pride and underestimation of his foe. He had not had all the facts, or he would have never allowed Kurosaki to surprise him during the fight. Byakuya had believed he was up against a mortal boy, someone with borrowed powers who knew nothing about pride or honour.
Now that he knew who Kurosaki Ichigo was, and more importantly, who his father was, Byakuya would never again be defeated by him.
But that was beyond the point, since Kurosaki and he wouldn't be in a position to prove that again. Not that Kurosaki didn't try. Or that Byakuya didn't feel like wringing his neck at least twice a day.
Like now.
"Byakuya are you listening to me?"
For one, being appointed as Taichou had not improved Kurosaki's manners.
"You will address me as Kuchiki-soutaichou, Kurosaki Ichigo," Byakuya said for the umpteenth time since the day Kurosaki had taken over his position. It didn't seem to penetrate his thick head that he wasn't a Substitute Shinigami anymore and now he had duties to tend to as well. "And no, the fact that Zaraki-Taichou burst into your Taisha and dragged you out for a fight is no excuse for your tardiness. You have to report on time with the tasks assigned to your Division, no excuses."
Kurosaki glared at him with the same fire Byakuya remembered from the war, crossing his arms in front of his chest in a clearly belligerent move. He was still a child, that much was clear. The rest of the Shinigami, regardless of the body they had, were at least a century old or close enough to make no difference. Kurosaki Ichigo had died in the mortal world as a seventeen years old boy, and had gone straight to Seiretei as a fully trained Shinigami with a Division waiting for him.
Byakuya could understand if he found the bureaucracy and staggering amount of paperwork the Taichous had to suffer confusing or annoying, God knew he did, but he wasn't going to cut him any slack. Kurosaki Ichigo had, in spite of his youth, been appointed to lead a Division. And he had accepted, so he needed to deal with the consequences.
And besides, if Kurosaki thought he had it tough, it was only because he had not seen Byakuya's workload.
"That's what I'm trying to say," Kurosaki snapped, still glaring. "It's not just Kenpachi, Ikkaku also follows me around, and my idiot dad keeps trying to surprise me or beat me senseless, and Yoruichi sneaks around just to annoy me, not to mention Shinji and Urahara and--"
"Enough, Kurosaki," Byakuya cut him off, fearing he might end up laughing at the distress so clear in Kurosaki's voice and expression. "You are a Taichou, you need to behave as such. If you are unable to uphold your position--"
"You're the boss, Byakuya! Get them out of my hair or I won't have time to fill out your stupid paperwork!" Kurosaki interrupted him, his face flushed and his eyes burning with rightful indignation.
And he still didn't address Byakuya properly.
Byakuya stood up from his chair, leaning forward and staring at Kurosaki straight in the eyes. "I might be the Soutaichou now, Kurosaki Ichigo," he said slowly, as if he was talking to a moron or a Kurosaki. "But the Gotei-13 is not a kindergarten, nor am I a teacher. It is not part of my duties to teach my subordinates to behave like adults. You have your own responsibilities and should be able to deal with any distraction that might come your way. Do not come to me with such feeble excuses again, am I being sufficiently clear?"
Kurosaki looked as if he wanted to say something to protest further, but for once in his life, decided to keep his mouth wisely shut. "Yes, Kuchiki-soutaichou," he finally mumbled sulkily.
"Is there anything you want to add?" Byakuya asked after a few heartbeats when Kurosaki remained standing in front of his desk silently, just glaring darkly at him.
"No."
"Good. I expect all the completed paperwork in my Division by tomorrow afternoon. Do not make me call for you again. You are dismissed, Kurosaki-taichou."
Kurosaki shot him one last mutinous look before turning on his heel and leaving the office. Byakuya stared after him, finally allowing his mouth to curl into a soft smile.
There were other perks to having Kurosaki in Soul Society after all. Seeing him suffer like this wasn't that bad.
…
The scheduled visits to the 12th Division were one of the worst duties Byakuya had now to attend to.
It was easy to ignore the Research Division while he was only responsible for the 6th, now he had to keep track of the progress of all of them and maintain the balance of the tasks assigned to each one, compensate for unscheduled assignments and other developments appearing, and deal with the head of each Division.
Byakuya felt as if he had not rested for more than an hour in the month since he was elected as Soutaichou, and was beginning to wonder how Yamamoto-soutaichou had managed to survive the position for millennia. Probably because his Taichous weren't a group of uncooperative barbarians, or maybe just because he was old and used to it.
It was no wonder Shuunsui and Ukitake had jumped at the chance of going to Central 46 Chamber instead of taking the position.
He wasn't in the most forgiving of moods, and the argument he had with Urahara about the use of forbidden materials for research and the sheer stubbornness of the man had not improved his disposition in the least. Urahara may be older and the greatest expert in his field, but he also was the one ultimately responsible for Aizen's greatest weapon and had spent a century living among mortals. He needed to learn his place in the Gotei-13 if he had any hope of keeping it. Not that Byakuya would be sorry to see him go, but with Kurotsuchi out of the picture, someone had to lead the Research Division and for some reason, scientists were in short supply lately.
Byakuya was looking forward to finishing his work and going home. A quiet evening with a book, a nice dinner and a long, leisure soak had never sounded so appealing. He just needed to drop the stack of files ready for delivery to Central 46 chamber and he'd be free to rest for the first time since he assumed his position.
The first thing he noticed when he opened the door to his office was that his fukutaichou's desk was occupied.
Maybe in other Divisions it wasn't a thing worth of notice, but being as Byakuya had had no time to find a fukutaichou, it jumped straight at him. It wasn't as if Byakuya didn't want a second in command, he did. Or as if he wanted to double the already impressive workload he had, he didn't. But it was impossible to find the time to check the files and interview the possible candidates for the position, and it wasn't a position anyone could fill, when he barely had the time to carry on with his normal duties and find a couple of hours rest before he keeled over.
It should have been a priority, Byakuya was well aware of that, but the lack of prospective candidates and the lack of actual time to do it were a bad combination.
And besides, even if he had found a fukutaichou, Byakuya was certain he would have never picked one with that hideous shade of hair.
Kurosaki looked up at the sound of the office door slamming shut, a frown of concentration on his features before his eyes moved down to the file in his hands, almost as if there was nothing wrong with his presence there. Byakuya could feel a vein throbbing in his temple.
"Kurosaki," he said, his voice sounding strained to his own ears. He should have gone straight home instead of stopping by the Taisha first. "What are you doing in my office?"
There was an instant of silence, stretching between the two of them and laden with incredulity and irritation. And then Kurosaki looked up from his file again, staring straight at Byakuya as if the answer was the most logical thing in the world.
"My office is currently invaded by morons and psychos, and my house is in no better condition. It was you who insisted on all this bloody paperwork done on time, Byakuya, and you have a spare desk. They won't follow me to the Soutaichou's office."
"Because," Byakuya felt the need to point out, gritting his teeth. "They still have a modicum of respect for their positions and mine, something you obviously lack."
Kurosaki had the nerve to shrug and turn his attention back to his file. "Yeah, we've already gone over that. Now, let me finish this so I can turn the paperwork in on time and go home to kick my father's face in."
Byakuya wondered if Central 46 Chamber had a spare position to fill, or if they would hold him accountable for the murder of one of his Taichous. Probably, yes. With that avenue closed to him, he decided the best course of action was just ignoring the idiot at his fukutaichou's desk and going home.
If he got into an argument with Kurosaki Ichigo here and now, there was no telling when he'd be able to get some decent sleep.
With a last cold look at Kurosaki, Byakuya deposited the folders in his hand on his desk and turned to the door again. "I expect every single thing to be in the exact position they are now when I arrive in the morning," he said opening the door. "And all your late paperwork to be properly filled."
…
In hindsight, maybe giving in without a fight the first time Kurosaki had barged into his office had not been the best idea. He had not believed Kurosaki would be so brazen as to try again once he knew it went against Byakuya's explicit orders.
Obviously Byakuya had grossly underestimated Kurosaki's stubbornness and disrespect.
"Is there a reasonable explanation to justify your repeated presence in my office, Kurosaki-taichou?" Byakuya asked coldly the moment he entered his office to find that, once again, Kurosaki Ichigo had taken over his fukutaichou's desk and was calmly doing his paperwork there.
Kurosaki looked up and shrugged. "Urahara wants to run some tests." That was all the explanation he gave, turning his attention back to what he was doing prior to Byakuya's arrival.
Byakuya looked at him blankly, resisting the impulse to release his zanpakutou and rip the nuisance to shreds, literally. The sheer amount of blood he would need to clean afterwards was the only thing preventing him to.
With a much put upon sigh, Byakuya closed the door after him and moved straight to his desk. At least his things were still neatly arranged, the tall piles of files to check and approve before being sent to their assigned Divisions covering the entire wooden surface.
"Urahara always wants to run some tests," Byakuya said, taking his seat and grabbing the first folder from the pile. "I don't see what kind of relation that has with your unwanted presence in my office."
Kurosaki dropped the file and stared at Byakuya, his eyebrows trying to crawl into his hairline. "Urahara wants to run some tests on my hollowification," Kurosaki enunciated slowly. "And from the look of it they didn't seem painless or fun. I would have gone home, but Kenpachi was standing guard there on the off chance I had a spare minute, not bloody likely with all this fucking paperwork to finish, and he could rope me into a fight."
Byakuya was feeling distinctly unimpressed at the explanation. "That still fails to justify why you are here, Kurosaki. Surely you have friends, or at least someone who doesn't find your presence irritating."
Kurosaki shot him a disgruntled look. "Well, Renji had a date so his place was off limits today."
"And my sister won't have you either? I was under the impression she liked you," Byakuya said, surprised. Unlikely as it was due to their characters, Rukia seemed to be fond of the idiot. And Kurosaki had risked his life for Rukia, so he must consider her a friend as well as a subordinate.
The mere thought that Kurosaki wanted to inflict his presence on Byakuya, who was clearly less than pleased with it, when he had people who voluntarily suffered him was baffling.
"She also had a date," Kurosaki said, one of his eyebrows arched up.
It wasn't difficult to read the meaning of that and Byakuya made a mental note to pay a visit to his old fukutaichou and have a friendly chat with him. He wasn't going to warn him off Rukia, Byakuya was aware of his sister's character and knew if someone was going to need help in that relationship it wasn't she. Still, he had a duty as an older brother and he was going to fulfil it.
"Is there any way I can rid myself of your company without resorting to violence, Kurosaki?" Byakuya asked after a few seconds silence, almost resigned to the fact that he was about to spend an afternoon with Kurosaki Ichigo.
"No," Kurosaki said confirming his guess. "So the sooner you let me get on with my work the sooner I'll be out of your hair."
Byakuya gritted his teeth. "I work in silence, Kurosaki," he warned in his coldest voice before turning his attention to his own paperwork. "If you make any noise, it will be Senbonzakura answering it."
"Got it."
For the next couple of hours the only noise inside Byakuya's office was the rustling of paper, the folders moving from one side of the desk to another as the files were completed. He wouldn't say he wasn't aware of Kurosaki's presence in the room, he was. He was deeply conscious of the other's steady breaths and movements. Byakuya could feel every time Kurosaki looked up at him only to resume his work after a second, could hear him rotating his neck when the tension began to accumulate after an hour of continuous writing.
Most surprising of all was the fact that Byakuya didn't mind his presence after a while, just ignored him and dedicated his entire attention to finishing his own work. With some luck he might have all the paperwork ready for delivery sometime in the next decade, and the fact that Kurosaki was able to work in peace and not annoy him with stupid questions or inane chatter was as much of a shock as it was a blessing.
"Done." Kurosaki broke the silence after an eternity, standing up from his chair and stretching his body. Byakuya looked briefly at him before returning to his current task. "God, this is boring! You need help to finish all that crap, Byakuya?"
Tempting as the idea of inflicting his work on someone else was, there was no way Byakuya would accept help from Kurosaki Ichigo. "If you are finished with your work, Kurosaki-taichou, please remove yourself from my office now," he said, not sparing another second to see how his words were received. "And don't presume to come here uninvited again."
"Suit yourself."
The sound of the door closing was the only indication of Kurosaki's departure. The silence, once again, was disturbed only by the rustling of paper as Byakuya finished his work for the day.
…
The Taichou meetings had become their own circle of hell for Byakuya, who lately felt more like a kindergarten teacher than the Soutaichou of the Gotei-13, no matter how much he had denied it before. He had serious doubts that Yamamoto had ever had to deal with the same kind of insubordination and utter foolishness as he was faced with every single time all his Taichous were in the same room. For one, Ukitake and Shuunsui were still alive, not a pile of ashes decorating some corner of Seiretei.
The topic of the day, apart from the selection of new candidates for the divisions and the scheduling of Taichou visits to the Academy, seemed to be 'harass Kurosaki Ichigo'. By the look if it, it was the preferred hobby of at least four of his Taichous.
Byakuya had the sudden feeling he wasn't going to get rid of Kurosaki's presence for a long, long time.
"Leave me the fuck alone!" Kurosaki was shouting in Urahara's face, his hand clenched around the hilt of his zanpakutou, his eyes narrowed and burning with fury. It would have been a more impressive sight had he not been hiding behind Rukia. "And keep that thing away from me!"
Urahara had a strange contraption pointed at Kurosaki, who kept edging away from him inch by inch. Had this been Kurotsuchi, Byakuya would have already intervened. It wasn't good form to experiment with fellow Shinigami and using a Taichou as a test subject was forbidden. He could remember Yamamoto-soutaichou reading Kurotsuchi the riot act in a meeting for an experiment done on a fourth seat, had it been a higher rank Byakuya had no doubts they would still be there listening to it.
But this wasn't Kurotsuchi, it was Urahara, and insane and annoying as the man was, Byakuya was certain he didn't actually intend to experiment on Kurosaki. At least no more than he had already had when the boy was mortal.
No, Urahara was doing it just for fun and if Kurosaki had not been too busy shouting and trying to stay away from whatever Urahara had in his hand, he'd have been able to read the expression on his torturer's face.
He'd leave him to suffer a few more minutes, but Byakuya had a mountain of work waiting for him and knew the meeting was going to be long enough as it was.
He entered the room regally and saw all movement stop, the tension on Kurosaki's shoulders relaxing a fraction as everyone scrambled to their usual places as Byakuya strolled to his place at the back of the room. He turned to face them, all eyes fixed on him.
"The first order of the meeting is the Academy recruitment," Byakuya said once silence had completely settled. "We're severely understaffed in most of the divisions, so the Academy has been speeding up the training to have recruits ready as soon as possible."
The first one to speak was Hitsugaya, meeting Byakuya's eyes calmly. "How long have the trainees been in the Academy?" His cold voice carried clearly in the almost silent room, everyone darting looks at him before their attention returned to Byakuya.
"Most of them have been in training for less than a year. The older students helped during the war and those who survived already have positions in different Divisions."
"Won't they be too green to work in a division?" Kurosaki Ichigo said, his brow furrowed.
Byakuya nodded, perfectly aware it was too soon for most of them. "Yes, but we are at peace now. They can finish their learning while they work. No mission should be so dangerous now a trainee Shinigami can't deal with it."
"With all due respect, Kuchiki-soutaichou," Hitsugaya spoke again, frowning. "I'd rather not have a half trained subordinate. We already have a huge backlog of work to sort through in my division and we have little to no time to spare teaching a group of kids who probably won't even have Shikai. The 10th Division formally renounces to their recruitment right at this time."
He had expected that much from at least a couple of the old divisions. They were the ones coping better with the new situation, probably because most of their members had been together for a long time.
"The 7th Division also renounces, Kuchiki-soutaichou," Komamura said in the silence which followed Hitsugaya's words.
Byakuya's eyes moved to the other side of the room in time to see his sister prodding Kurosaki on the back, shaking her head firmly when Kurosaki looked back at her. Kurosaki frowned, nodding and she shook her head harder, glaring at him. Byakuya stared amused at their silent communication. Finally Kurosaki narrowed his eyes at Rukia who scowled darkly and crossed her arms over her chest mutinously.
"The 13th Division also renounces, Bya--Kuchiki-soutaichou," Kurosaki said, a spot of colour rising on his checks at his slip.
Byakuya was glad the idiot had corrected himself in the last second, though Yoruichi's smirk told him it had not gone unnoticed. The last thing he needed was for the rest of his subordinates to know he was unable to make one pesky Taichou address him properly.
"If this is all, the rest of the divisions will proceed to the Academy in a week's time and select the candidates."
They went through the rest of the points of the meeting by rota, nothing really interesting to discuss in any of them. Byakuya could see how some of the attendants became restless after a while, Kenpachi shooting challenging looks at Kurosaki Ichigo, who pointedly ignored them. Lisa had cuffed Kurosaki Isshin twice in the back of his head for trying to peek down Matsumoto's cleavage and the average temperature in the room had dropped by several degrees. Renji was making eyes at Rukia, who was also ignoring him and there was a bruise on his face that suggested the previous date might not have been as successful as he might have hoped. Byakuya reminded himself of his due chat with his ex-fukutaichou.
"That is all for today," Byakuya said, watching as Kurosaki Ichigo tensed the moment Urahara's hand fell on the contraption he was brandishing before, getting ready to flee. "Just one more thing before the meeting is adjourned. While we encourage friendly sparring sessions between divisions and cooperation in whatever might be needed, we don't condone the harassing of one of our own or his unwilling participation in experiments."
He hoped everyone read the meaning of what he had said without the need to spell out Leave Kurosaki Ichigo alone so I can regain the sole use of my office.
There were a few scowls at his last pronouncements, especially from Kenpachi and Kurosaki Isshin. Byakuya ignored them.
"Meeting is adjourned; you can go back to your duties."
They filed out in something resembling order; though it didn't escape Byakuya's notice how Kurosaki Ichigo was the first one to leave. He didn't have much hope of his order being followed, but at least most of them would behave for the next week.
…
"You know, Byakuya, I think I've finally figured out why only the 11th division goes on fighting rampages."
Byakuya looked up from his work at the sound of the voice, not surprised in the least to find Kurosaki Ichigo entering his office with a disgruntled expression on his face. His hair was mused, though how it was possible for Byakuya to tell with those wild spikes was a mystery, and there were some rips in his shihakusho and haori. Kurosaki closed the door after him, careful not to slam it, and then moved to the fukutaichou's desk and plopped on the chair, resting his head back and staring at the ceiling.
He supposed he had to be grateful he had got a fortnight reprieve from Kurosaki's presence, but Byakuya was feeling too annoyed at the fact that Kurosaki was back inside his office for it to register.
"Don't you know how to knock, Kurosaki-taichou?" he said bitingly, his voice cold and low.
Kurosaki looked at him. "Yes, but would you have given me leave to enter?" he retorted with an arched brow.
"No." There was no need for Byakuya to deny the obvious.
"So there, I didn't bother."
It was useless to argue against the stubborn idiot, Byakuya had known that for a long time. Resigned, he pointedly ignored Kurosaki and went back to work.
The silence lasted for a whole two heartbeats, Kurosaki sighing loudly before he opened his mouth to deliver unwanted insight about his opening gambit. "It's the paperwork, all those fucking files you make us write and re-write until our hands cramp," Kurosaki said, irritation oozing from every single word as if Byakuya was personally responsible of the Gotei-13 rules. Byakuya would have gladly pointed out that the rules had been there before any of them were alive, but that would mean acknowledging the idiot, and he wasn't in the mood for that. "If I release my sword I have to fill the S-24 form, twice for each occasion, explaining the use and need of the release."
Byakuya was well aware of that rule, and had complained about it bitterly to his grandfather when he was still a student. He didn't complain anymore, he had just learned to hone his skills in such a way a release was unnecessary. Most of the other Taichous were the same, it figured Kurosaki would be the only one having trouble with it. How did he managed, when his sword was constantly in Shikai was a complete mystery.
"And that's not mentioning that if I ever go Bankai I will be swamped under paperwork. Form S-25, S-26 and B-345, all of them comprised of 47 copies, for each member of Central 46 Chambers plus the Soutaichou. This is fucking torture!"
"Kurosaki, if you've come here to complain," Byakuya said, fearing he was going to be listening to the idiot's rant for a long time if he didn't interrupt now, "you are in the wrong place. I'm not interested in your opinions or company."
Kurosaki shot him a dark look, his brow furrowed in a scowl, and then picked some papers from the desk and a pen and started filling them. "No, I'm not here to complain. I'm here to fill the damned S-25, S-26 and B-345 because Shinji thought two weeks without trying to kill me were enough, and he went all out on me on my way back home. I'm just grateful there are no forms to fill for using my mask or I'd still be here writing them next year."
Now, there was an idea. Byakuya considered for an instant how many files would be needed to justify the release of an inner hollow and how to present the proposal to Central 46 Chambers, if only to be the first one to see Kurosaki's face the next time he did it. However, that would mean having Kurosaki there while he filled them so maybe he could just let things stand as they were.
"You should do that in your own office," Byakuya said, more because he felt he had to than actually expecting Kurosaki to heed his words.
"I know," Kurosaki said looking up at him with a smirk. "But that would deprive me of your charming company, and you of mine."
Byakuya felt a flush creeping up his face, his eyes narrowing in annoyance. He didn't like being made fun of, and was about to tell that to Kurosaki in no uncertain terms when he beat him to it.
"And yeah, I remember you work in silence, so I'll just get on with it and shut up."
Byakuya kept glaring at Kurosaki for a minute as the silence settled around them before going back to his own work. He had to concede that round to Kurosaki.
…
"I am surprised, Kurosaki," Byakuya heard himself saying before he was conscious of speaking; frowning at himself once he realized he was the one engaging Kurosaki in a conversation. They had been working in silence for close to an hour, only the soft scratch of pen on paper and the occasional annoyed sigh falling from Kurosaki's lips heard in the room. It was surprising, the feeling of normalcy he lately had when Kurosaki was in his office, it had been some days since the last time he had serious entertained the idea of killing him just to be rid of his presence. "You seem to be calm and accepting of my sister's relationship with Abarai-taichou."
Kurosaki looked up at him, puzzled. "Why wouldn't I be?" He seemed sincerely confused at the question, and Byakuya wondered if he had misread the situation.
He wished he had kept his mouth shut, but there was no going back either. "You were willing to die for my sister yet it doesn't bother you she has given her affections to someone else." It was a statement, not a question. Whatever Byakuya had assumed before about his sister's relationship with her Taichou, he could see now they were mere friends. That only made it harder to understand the lengths he had been willing to go to save her before.
The frown etched on Kurosaki's features cleared suddenly, an expression of incredulity taking its place. "Wait, you don't mean--" he began, stopping suddenly and shaking his head. "No way, you're insane! Rukia is my friend."
Yes, he could see that. "Would you die for any of your friends?" Byakuya couldn't help asking, unable to understand him.
Kurosaki shrugged, as if the question wasn't anything out of the ordinary. "I guess, thought Rukia is special; she was the first one who believed I could protect everyone. She was the first one to grant me the power to do it." Kurosaki had a kind of far away look, almost melancholic. Maybe Byakuya hadn't been that far off the mark, at least considering Kurosaki's feelings. "But, well--she's Rukia!" Kurosaki finished, an almost disgusted expression on his face.
"Are you suggesting my sister is undesirable, Kurosaki-taichou?" Byakuya asked, offended on Rukia's behalf.
"No!" Kurosaki protested. "She's cute, I guess--for Renji. They're perfect for each other, and well, she's nice, when she's not trying to kill me, and a good friend, and, well--" he was babbling, a bit of colour creeping on his cheeks and Byakuya raised an eyebrow amused in spite of himself. "But she's a girl!"
And maybe he had been way off the mark, Byakuya realized at the way Kurosaki's jaws snapped shut at the last pronouncement, his face beet red.
They returned to their paperwork in silence, and by the time Kurosaki finished and left the office, Byakuya had already decided he wasn't going to think about it anymore.
…
Byakuya had tried not to think about Kurosaki's words. He really had.
Kurosaki, and anyone else in Soul Society for that matter, was free to like whoever he chose. It wasn't an issue, not like it might be in the living world. Take reproduction out of the equation and people were a lot more open-minded about things like same sex couples. Ukitake and Shuunsui were a clear example of that, even Yoruichi and Soifon, much as it pained Byakuya to think about his senpai in any kind of relationship. So he didn't see where Kurosaki's embarrassment at not preferring women came from.
Still, it was too much information for Byakuya's tastes. He regretted ever asking Kurosaki about Rukia; it wasn't as if Byakuya really cared about it, he had just been curious because it made no sense to him. Risking so much for someone who wasn't his family and then seeing her in someone else's arms, and not feeling anything but happiness for them.
But well, Kurosaki had always been an odd one, and Byakuya didn't need to think about him. Not with the amount of things, important things he had to consider already. Like the latest possible candidates to fill the position as his fukutaichou.
Those were the things he needed to keep in mind, not whether Kurosaki's admission meant that it was Renji he had feelings for. Byakuya didn't care, and he had no idea where that thought had come from.
He frowned, glaring at the top of Kurosaki's head as if he was the one to blame for Byakuya's distraction. And well, he was.
"Something on your mind, Byakuya?" Kurosaki said, looking up straight into Byakuya's narrowed eyes.
"No," he snapped curtly, moving his eyes back to where they should be, perusing the candidates files.
He could practically hear Kurosaki shrug and go back to his work, Byakuya reading the information on the file with a poorly concealed moue of distaste. Who had found these candidates? They were completely inadequate for the position, and their level of power insufficient for even a seated officer in another Division.
He closed the folder and resisted the urge to toss it on the floor.
"Is it Renji, then?"
The words escaped his lips without leave from his brain, Kurosaki's head snapping up to stare at him in shock. "What?"
"You don't disapprove of their relationship," Byakuya continued, wondering what arguments his treacherous mouth was about to form. "Yet you still spend your time here, in spite of my continued efforts to make you leave, instead of with them, where you are welcomed. It stands to reason that you don't want to see them together. If it's not Rukia, then it has to be Renji."
Kurosaki's face changed expressions so quickly it was impossible for Byakuya to read them all, from shock to disbelief to a kind of amusement, until he finally barked a laugh.
"You've got it so wrong, Byakuya," Kurosaki said, chuckling. "Renji is perfect for Rukia, hell, he's been in love with her since they were brats--and that in Seiretei means a shitload of years. I'm happy for them, and I don't mind seeing them together at all. Renji's a friend, nothing more and nothing less."
"Why do you keep pestering me, then?" Byakuya questioned, feeling that his grasp on logic was slipping. Besides hiding from every single psycho working in the Gotei-13 at current, there had to be a reason for Kurosaki's continued presence in his office. He had other places to go to, Byakuya didn't understand why he kept returning there.
"Well, I like seeing them together, that's true. But they are in their honeymoon phase." And it was wrong seeing anyone referring to his sister's and Renji's relationship as a honeymoon, especially since Byakuya knew it was probably more violent than the last war. "They need space, and you honestly don't want to be around them when they get loving with each other."
"Yes, it might get very dangerous," Byakuya deadpanned and was amused to see Kurosaki cracking a rueful smile. He felt his lips trying to curl into an answering smirk and smothered the expression before it was fully formed.
"Don't I know that!"
They went back to work in silence after that, the endless writing on the page blurring after a while. It was incredibly boring, he had to give that to Kurosaki, and some of his taichous needed to go back to school and learn how to write. Kenpachi's efforts alone were enough to give anyone a migraine.
"It still doesn’t explain what you're doing here, Kurosaki," he said without looking up, blinking tiredly and trying to focus on the report. Who was this one from? Kurosaki Isshin, and it looked like chicken scrawl badly done by a two years old. Byakuya decided to assign him the next clean up mission in Hueco Mundo just out of spite.
And probably his son would be grateful enough to leave Byakuya alone for a couple of days.
"Well, Byakuya," Kurosaki said, and something in his tone made him look up at him. "I wouldn't be able to enjoy your company anywhere else. I'm done for today. Need any help with those? No?" He finished before Byakuya had the chance to reject his offer. Kurosaki stood up and went to the door, casting one last amused look at him. "As you know, since you were the one to give me that mission, I'll be away for the next couple of days. Try not to get too bored without me."
Byakuya stared dumbly at the closed door for a second before he shook himself from his stupor. Maybe he should give the Hueco Mundo mission to a different Kurosaki.
He was getting too cocky for his own good.
…
Byakuya didn't get bored.
He really didn't. It was impossible to get bored with Kenpachi following him again, and the mess up with the test subjects he had to sort out in the 12th. Not to mention the reports about some high class Hollows being seen in Rukongai, or the latest insanity from the Shinigami Women Association, which now was more annoying than ever thanks to Lisa joining it.
So no, he wasn't bored, if anything he was even more exhausted than before and bemoaned the lack of a fukutaichou to help him cope with the paperwork. The day only had so many hours, and Byakuya didn't feel like spending some of them writing down the latest screw up from his idiotic subordinates.
That was the reason he went straight home without stopping by his office during the days Kurosaki was out on the mission.
He was tired, he needed a rest.
And it had nothing to do with his empty office.
Nothing at all.
…
Continues here