A monumental fragment so I can feel okay about writing about the weather and dinner last night...
There's this entry I've got going on private mode that keeps me from posting since I began writing it a week after Daniel was born. Its my account of his birth, but it's snowballed into... more. As the pattern goes, I've kept from posting because I'd like to finish the expansive post I've created with heaven and earth included--before writing about everyday life. That's would be ideal, but Daniel is six weeks old today... (well, at 6:15 this evening), and there's more to say. So here's the snippet that's least fragmented, and I'll post the whole of it more publicly when it something like complete:
Baby boy is lounging in my right arm, breathing noisily, occasionally making an effort at opening both eyes more than a crack. It's sweeter than I can describe. Stay with me now, in a moment you'll be leaving for college---just hold on a moment. It's been ten days. Ten!
This entry could take all year.
Daniel Josué entered the world last week--Friday, February 12 at 6:15 PM into a pool of warm water and my arms, his wide open eyes looking up at my face in the unlikely tranquility of a hospital delivery room. I'll never forget those moments. God was with us. Reflecting on the whole experience it feels impossible to organize my thoughts in a logical sequence for telling the story. I've given short accounts here and there of the water birth, but they're completely lacking in conveying what occurred as this little life was brought forth. I doubt many people are inquiring after the more ineffable aspects of my son coming into the world when they ask how it went, and I can truly appreciate this because I don't know where to begin with the impressions it has laid on my heart. I'm going to try to put it in words here.
God has spoken in such a clear and undeniable way through the lives of both my children, awakening me to an unparalleled awareness of my utter dependency on Him in all things, most immediately in caring for the two children He has blessed me with. But it isn't only my need and His mighty power to save that becomes clear. I'm amazed by His fierce love for me; a love that demonstrates itself in persevering, pursuing me in light of my faint-heartedness, to such an extent that He would bestow unexpected turns of illumination. Birthing Daniel did just that, through the pain of labor and the peculiar exhilaration of feeling in my body as I knew in my mind that it was all for a joyful purpose--the arrival of my son. [To continue...]
Baby boy is lounging in my right arm, breathing noisily, occasionally making an effort at opening both eyes more than a crack. It's sweeter than I can describe. Stay with me now, in a moment you'll be leaving for college---just hold on a moment. It's been ten days. Ten!
This entry could take all year.
Daniel Josué entered the world last week--Friday, February 12 at 6:15 PM into a pool of warm water and my arms, his wide open eyes looking up at my face in the unlikely tranquility of a hospital delivery room. I'll never forget those moments. God was with us. Reflecting on the whole experience it feels impossible to organize my thoughts in a logical sequence for telling the story. I've given short accounts here and there of the water birth, but they're completely lacking in conveying what occurred as this little life was brought forth. I doubt many people are inquiring after the more ineffable aspects of my son coming into the world when they ask how it went, and I can truly appreciate this because I don't know where to begin with the impressions it has laid on my heart. I'm going to try to put it in words here.
God has spoken in such a clear and undeniable way through the lives of both my children, awakening me to an unparalleled awareness of my utter dependency on Him in all things, most immediately in caring for the two children He has blessed me with. But it isn't only my need and His mighty power to save that becomes clear. I'm amazed by His fierce love for me; a love that demonstrates itself in persevering, pursuing me in light of my faint-heartedness, to such an extent that He would bestow unexpected turns of illumination. Birthing Daniel did just that, through the pain of labor and the peculiar exhilaration of feeling in my body as I knew in my mind that it was all for a joyful purpose--the arrival of my son. [To continue...]