I need advice
Okay, I've been watching this community for quite awhile, yet this is my first post. I'm not sure if this is the right place for this post or not, so please just bear with me. About 4 months ago, my partner and I helped my mother move in with us. She has a long terrible history with having a extreme alcohol problem that has lasted most of my life. Anyway, she called me and asked if she could come live with us to start over; to get away from the likes of the crowd that has the same issue(s), and to get away from her bf at the time that treats her like crap. Now mind you, this man has kicked her out not once before, but several times. Serving her eviction papers, the whole nine. Well, things have been rough lately. She has a horrible track record with finding and keeping a job. So she's been helping me out at the garage I work at for money. Now, she's lost this job. I love my mother very much, don't get me wrong. But being around her for a length of time drives me crazy. She's caused me alot of torment and anguish growing up with abusive alcoholics. She decided to pull a no-call-no-show on Friday and now today which is Monday. She decided to have her ex-bf (mentioned above) come pick her up at my house which he is not welcome at and take her the hour and a half back to from where she had moved to get away from this crowd, only to fall right back into the same old ways. I am furious. My partner and I had shelled out almost $300.00 to find her a moving truck (which was nearly impossible at the time of year), had to ask other friends to drop their plans and come with us to help her move all of her stuff. Now I hear that she's thinking of moving back with him. I was planning on telling her that she had to leave anyway because I think I've dealt with enough alcoholism and crap in my life. I've been taking care of her ever since I was 11 years old. I've picked her up off the floor and mended her wounds from where she would be so wasted that she'd end up getting hurt and falling down and smashing her face. Which was a regular occurance. I never had a real life that a kid should have. I am going on 25 now. I think enough is enough. I need to start living my life for me and not babysitting someone all the time. Everyone keeps telling me not to ask my mom to leave....WHY?!?! She doesn't lift a finger around the house. Lives with us rent-free. Drives our cars, doesn't replace the gas. You have to drag money out of her for bills. For example, my electric bill has gone up $80.00 since she's been living with us. How can one person use that much? Then doesn't want to contribute at all... I wish her happiness, I really do. In a way I hope she leaves on her own. But if she goes back to all that garbage, I don't want anything to do with her. Now I'm being told that "you need to have patience with her.". Umm, I've offered help in everyway that I can all my life. "What can I do to help you overcome this?". I just get kicked in the teeth everytime and I'm tired of it! You can lead a horse to water, but can't make it drink I guess. My bf is very upset with her as well, yet he tells me not to shut her out. His mom had passed a few years ago, so I can understand his point of view. However, I'm not sure how many of you out there have had to deal with this sort of thing. I think only those who have had would truly understand. I can't keep doing this and bailing her out everytime anymore. It has caused me so much stress and grief in my life and I can't take it anymore. I guess I must have done something pretty damn bad in a past life to deserve this. I love my mom, but sometimes I wish she wasn't MY mom. Does that make any sense? I just can't deal with this anymore. Any advice or comments that might help, please let me know. Thanks.