THIS ROUND IS NOW CLOSED TO NEW PROMPTS.
ROUND FOUR WILL OPEN AT 10PM EST ON MONDAY THE 14TH.
ROUND THREE
closing at 5000 comments
Please read the
[rules] before commenting!
REMINDER: THERE IS A SPOILER POLICY IN PLACE UNTIL 7 MAY.
PROMPT FORMATTING:
Alphabetize pairings. They will be archived that way!Put [RPF] before RPF prompts
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“But,” Steve asked, as Pepper handed them their iPhones and showed them all the contacts they had in there and how to text them, “why would I send a text message when I could just make a phone call?”
“People don’t do that anymore, really, unless you wanted to talk for an extended period of time,” she replied.
“But-” he began, because that made no sense - why would you send messages back and forth when a conversation could resolve things quickly?
“Ha!” said Thor. “Fear not, Captain Steve! Look - you can send tiny pictures as well as words. I think Dr. Bruce would really like this angry green man face! Does it not remind you of him?”
With Thor around, Steve also had a lot more fun at their evening movie sessions. “What is this?” Thor would demand. “Why would they entrust an implement of destruction to the smallest, girliest creature in the group?” He smashed his fist onto the table. Natasha coughed. “Apologies, Natasha. You should know I consider you a most formidable warrior woman.” She gave him a rare smile.
And his presence definitely made the now mandatory, Tony Stark led Saturday field-trips a lot more bearable. “Tony Stark!” he boomed at the Central Park Zoo. “I wish to have one of these penguins! Certainly you have enough money to build it an appropriate habitat in our tower.”
During their free time, Steve would sit and sketch, or read, while Thor tried to come up with something JARVIS couldn’t tell him or show him on the screen in the living room. It was easy being with the Asgardian in a way that it wasn’t with the others, which made perfect sense, since they were outsiders. At least, this was what Steve repeated to himself, daily, as he caught himself considering the angle of Thor’s jaw or got a broad smile in response to Thor catching him stare at him.
But as each day passed it became more difficult to convince himself that that was all that was going on. There was a nervous feel in his stomach that had never been there before which he suspected were the butterflies that girls often talked about. During their sparring he often found it difficult to focus as they tumbled around the mat, and especially when Thor’s body pinned him down.
Eventually, he relented, reaching for the lubricant that had been in his bedside table when he first moved in - which had really annoyed him, at first, but he came to appreciate the gesture since it was a huge improvement over his wartime methods. Closing his eyes, he tried to imagine Peggy, or the pin-up girls that the men in the army carried with them, even Natasha’s breasts as they bounced while she did her own workouts.
These things had been adequate, before - though wartime often led him to Bucky, and the others - but he hadn’t touched himself since Thor arrived and he found he sorely wanted to come and was frustrated with the lack of progression.
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He came fiercely, moaning and working his hand loosely over the waves of orgasm. His breath erratic for a few moments afterwards, and then he laid and stared at the ceiling as he let the post-orgasm haze wash off of him. Shit, he thought, and then reminded himself. It’s OK now. It’s fine to feel this way, to want this... He shuddered, though, his lower abdomen tightening. He inhaled again, then stood to go wash himself.
It very likely would ended there, with fantasies each night before bed, if they didn’t have to repel a planned invasion of Washington, D.C. the next day. Thor had been on the ground, with him, taking care of the large tank like structures coming down the streets. He had turned to grin at Steve as he mounted one of them and rose his hammer to strike - and he was completely unprepared for the bomb that ripped the tank apart. Steve had to use his shield to protect himself from the intense heat and shrapnel, and when he was finally able to move the shield he saw only a jagged hole in the ground.
They’re immortal, he told himself, but he didn’t believe it, and he felt like he was going to vomit.
Thor’s eyes were closed as he lay to the side of the pit, charred, his cape still on fire. Steve rushed over, and it was only when he stepped on the cape that Thor opened his eyes. Relief flooded Steve, deeper and denser than any he had felt before, even when Tony had been hurtling down from the sky in Manhattan. “Give me a hand, would you, Captain Steve?” Thor asked.
Shit, shit, shit, Steve thought, instantly stretching his hand out.
* * *
“Hi. Natasha?” he said, the next afternoon, standing in the doorway to the kitchen where she was perched on the counter, eating a salad.
The spy glanced at him warily. He half expected her to growl. Then she sighed. “Captain.”
“You can really call me Steve,” he said. “When we’re not - uhm, anyway, I wanted to ask you for some advice?” He winced. Natasha set down her salad and crossed her arms over her chest, emphasizing her breasts. Steve took a moment to take them in, confirming his suspicions. He smiled at her. “OK, so,” he began, taking a seat at the kitchen table. “And I’m asking, since you were the one who kindly introduced me to, well, twenty-first century attitudes towards sexuality, so. Let’s say that a man wants to let another man know they’re interested in them and they don’t happen to be sharing a tent on a mountain. What would that man do?” He gave her one his huge, should be trademarked since it was on all the trading cards grins.
“Seriously?” she said. “Why don’t you go ask Tony? He’s picked up tons of guys.”
Steve furrowed his brow. “Tony is with Pepper,” he said.
Natasha stared into the distance for a moment, and then said, “Right, OK. Well, in this completely hypothetical situation, I think that it would be best to be forward. Men like that. So, this man should let the other dem-man know that he’s interested.”
Steve furrowed his brow deeper. “With...flowers? Chocolates? A card?”
Natasha pursed her lips, seemingly in an attempt to hide a smile. “Not...no. I would advise this man to either just say who he felt, or to just...express those feelings. Physically.”
“That seems quite forward,” Steve said. “What if the man is not sure if the other man is interested in, ugh, men?”
“Don’t worry about that, at that point,” Natasha said. “He’s interested.”
“But...how do you know?”
Natasha shook her head, shrugged and picked her salad up, so Steve gave her the big smile again and stood up. “Thanks,” he said. She waved her hand at him as he walked out of the kitchen.
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So he skipped breakfast and went right for the gym, feeling slightly nauseous, but that was what super-soldier serum was for, right? “Captain Steve!” Thor said, ass facing Steve as he tied a sneaker. “I was afraid you would not make it today, as you missed breakfast.” This, Steve thought as Thor stood and faced him, is as clear a sign as the universe is going to give you.
“No, definitely fine,” he said, and smiled back. Thor regarded him thoughtfully, then nodded slowly. “Very fine, actually. Thanks for asking, really, I appreciate-” He was cut off when Thor closed the distance between them and placed a hand on the side of Steve’s cheek. It was surprisingly tender, and even though there was, really, no other way to interpret it, Steve hesitated. He met Thor’s eyes, keep himself from grimacing, and then closed his eyes and leaned in.
He did not initiate the kiss, just headed in the general direction of it. He was not really sure what to expect - but it began like other kisses. But with much more beard, which tickled, enough to make him smile. That was when it becomes unlike other kisses, as Thor took advantage of his open mouth and worked his tongue in, slowly, and Steve followed his rhythm and found that he had placed a hand on Thor’s hip and was squeezing. This is interesting, he thought, because his hands, his body seem to know what to do even though he did not.
He moans, slightly, as they break. “I find you very desirable,” Thor said, inches from his face.
“Yes,” Steve said. “I mean, also.”
Thor laughed, and Steve grinned and realized he still has his hand on Thor’s hip. For a moment he wondered if they would just break apart and proceed as usual, go on a date, later - dancing, he thought, but then pushed it out of his head immediately. But then one of demi-god’s big hands was on his shoulder and he looked, well, conspiratorial. “My bedroom,” he said. “As it has the extra-large-king-size bed.”
Steve knew he should say something, or at least, he thought he should. Or that this should proceed slowly, because who kissed and then just - but it’s been building for too long, it had been building for too long even back then. “Yes,” he said again, and Thor grinned at him, bounced, and took his hand from Steve’s shoulder.
He wished he did not have this interlude to think - because it’s not just his first time, he’s about to sleep with a man. Sort of. And how, exactly...he has a rough idea, and he knows he should have done some research. He’s sure JARVIS would be more than used to - but he was too embarrassed before it occurred to him that, since it was Tony’s computer, he would probably be able to see...
They walked to Thor’s room as though it was completely innocuous. Steve is relieved to see that Thor is glancing around the hallway as well. Thor opened the door and Steve walked in, and all he can say is, “That is a really big bed.”
“Indeed,” Thor said, and gently closes the door behind them. “Do not be nervous,” he added, “I wish to give you much pleasure.”
Steve does not doubt this, and this time he placed a hand at the back of Thor’s neck and guided him in for a kiss. It was softer, deeper, and he sighed and relaxed into it. Their bodies were pressed next to each other and Steve ran a hand down Thor’s side, finding the place where it had previously rested.
He was not aware that Thor was guiding him towards the bed until a hand pushed him downwards and he felt the mattress beneath him. He closed his eyes and pressed his arms backwards as Thor leaned in to kiss him further. This time, their groins aligned, and Steve moaned when he felt the hard cock against his own. Thor slid down and moved so their legs intertwined and he pressed into Steve’s leg.
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Thor pushed him, and he fell backwards onto the mattress and bounced from the force. Thor frowned. “I do not mean to diminish your strength, Steve Rogers,” he said. “But you must let me know if I am-”
“I will,” Steve said, and slid back on the enormous mattress so that Thor could climb on. When Thor kneeled between his legs, he moved his arm to grasp onto the back of the taller man. The kiss between them was much more urgent, and Steve bucked his hips for contact, another action that seemed involuntary.
“Yes,” Thor said. A hand ran through Steve’s hair as he kissed at Steve’s neck, light at first and then more intense. Steve arched back into this contact and shuddered as a finger ran across one of his nipples. “Glorious,” Thor whispered, then took an earlobe into his mouth. Steve arched further and the finger twisted.
“Oh, yes,” he said as Thor’s teeth scraped against his collar bone. “Oh.” Hands were on either side of his hip and picked him up, easily, causing his cock to throb. Thor laid him into the pillows, which momentarily distracted Steve - how had he managed to get so many more? Thor took the opportunity, whisking off Steve’s shorts.
“Ah,” he said. “A mortal protection device.” He squeezed Steve’s cock in the jock-strap, and Steve had to bite at the bottom of his lip again. “You will remove it?”
Steve nodded as Thor pulled his own shorts off. He knelt, again, and it was better than Steve had imagined - he had been able to use his artistic skills to put together a composite, but this was just more. Much more, he realized, and felt the rise in his throat again.
“I-” he began, but Thor silenced him with a kiss. He moved down Steve’s neck again, then to his chest, and his nipples. “Oh, god!” Steve exclaimed as Thor took one, then the other, into his mouth. As he sucked he held Steve in place with a hand on his hip, and then another.
He continued down Steve’s stomach, detoured to his hip bones, and then kissed the tip of his cock. “Oh,” Steve said - fifteen minutes ago, they had been in the gym. Now Thor had the tip in his mouth, and then his tongue was running along the underside of the head, then the underside of the shaft. Steve relaxed his shoulders, occasionally issuing moans of contentment as Thor teased him with his tongue. Then, suddenly, he took him down his mouth.
Steve closed his eyes and grasped at pillows as Thor moved up and down, licking and stopping at each sensitive part. He was unaware one of the hands was off his hips until he heard the drawer open. The lube hit the mattress. It made Steve feel better that this had come standard with all bedrooms in Stark towers.
He was surprised when the demi-god bent his hip upwards, not realizing that they were going to - but he stopped, told whatever it was to go away, did his best to relax into the surprising, gentle touch of Thor’s finger as it ringed and rimmed his...
“Yes?” Thor asked. Steve exhaled in shudders and nodded. A pillow was placed under him as Thor continued to work his finger against Steve’s entrance. “You are comfortable?”
“Yes,” Steve said, almost a lie, but there was doubt and there was need, and need was clearly winning. A lubed finger replaced the other one, and he closed his eyes. The breach caused him to gasp, but he nodded before Thor could ask, before he could break the spell. The demi-god moved slowly, deeper, and Steve bit hard at his lip. “Please,” he said. “Please.” There had to be some reason that this- “Oh! Fuck!” He actually blushed, once the electricity subsided - it was the first time he had said the word aloud.
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“That is...I-” Steve tried, but was silenced with a kiss. As Thor worked him open he hit the spot more consistently, and laughed when Steve’s cock throbbed and moved across his pelvis.
“Soon, friend!” Thor said to it, and Steve grinned. “Another?”
“Yes,” Steve said, though he was already feeling a burn, a sense that there was no way he could accommodate more, let alone what was between Thor’s thighs. He had to work at keeping his face blank as three fingers entered him, spread him, leaned up to kiss his partner so there was something else he could feel.
Still, he felt a distinct lack when Thor removed his fingers, even though he stroked against his entrance gently again. Steve watched, transfixed, as the demi-god leaned back and slicked his cock. He moaned, and for a moment, thought of blurting a confession of all of his inadequacies and inexperiences - but then one hand of Thor’s hand was on his shoulder, the other on hand was on Thor’s own cock, and he felt the tip tease against him.
“Oh, fuck, yes, I need you,” he found himself saying, and meaning it. “Please.” Thor used his hands to guide Steve’s legs up to his shoulders.
“You will never need to ask, Steve Rogers,” Thor said. “You will have anything.”
He pressed forward, but the motion was only slight. Thor lifted him, brought their hips together, and pressed in a little more. Steve attempted to say something, but found that all that happened was his mouth opened, his tongued pressed against his bottom lip, and then he bit it again as Thor adjusted Steve’s hip, held him tight, and pressed further.
It took some time before he was full and close to bursting, and Steve was biting hard enough at his lip that, without his enhancements, he was sure he would draw blood. “Open your eyes,” Thor said, and Steve obeyed. “You will trust me?” Steve nodded, meeting the steady blue eyes.
Thor canted out, in, and out, and Steve held his gaze and exhaled. Thor moved in, slowly, so that their lips met for a deep kiss - and whatever adjusted with this movement was what was needed. This time, as Thor moved back, Steve gasped and moaned. “Ah, yes,” Thor said, thrusting harder.
“Oh, fuck, god, yes,” Steve managed, vision almost obscured by the sudden shift in sensation from pain to pleasure as they found their rhythm. He arched his back, wanting more, and found himself pressing his hips in rhythm to Thor’s thrusts. It elicited the first moan from the demi-god, and Steve repeated it with each thrust - not necessarily easy, but suddenly the fullness was exactly what he had wanted. What he needed. He was not sure how long they moved, each moaning, and was only aware that he was growing closer and closer-
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“Yes, oh, yes,” Thor said, as the last bit pumped across Steve’s stomach, and then Steve arched even harder into the demi-god’s own orgasm, warmth flooding him and making him spread his shoulders wide and exhale in spasms.
For a few moments, there were only deep breaths between them. Then Thor pulled out, rolled over, and lay on his side next to Steve - who was largely amazed at his ability to get his muscles to do anything, after...
“You found that pleasurable, Steve Rogers?” Thor asked, voice soft.
“Yes,” Steve replied. “You can just. Steve.”
“Steve,” Thor said, and kissed him on the forehead - tender, evocative, and Steve felt something tighten in his stomach - before rolling off of the bed and almost bouncing into the bathroom.
Well, Steve thought, and without the Asgardian in the room, he found he plunged quickly into the place he really did not want to go. There goes that. He realized, quickly, he shouldn’t be so flippant - after all, it had been... and how many people lost their virginities to demi-gods? That looked like that? That made you feel like that?
Thor returned, a wet wash cloth in one hand, and he slid next to Steve and wiped, his touch light and gentle, cleaning him in a few easy strokes and then tossing the cloth aside. “Steve? Are you alright?” Thor had propped himself up on an elbow and his expression evinced real concern.
“Uhm. Well. I’ve never-”
“Ah, yes, the other night when you were speaking with Director Fury and Tony Stark the assassin spies were most helpful and taught me how your Midgard couplings are much less diverse-”
“Did they show you...a movie?” Steve asked, though he already knew the answer.
“It was most sad,” Thor said, pressing his lips together. “In the end-”
“Yes, I’ve seen - no, nevermind. I meant to say that I’ve never...uhm.” He furrowed his brow and winced, not sure how this would be received.
“You have never...coupled before?” Thor asked. Steve closed his eyes and nodded. “Steve. Please. I did not...cause you injury, or-”
“No, no,” Steve said, forcing himself to open his eyes. “No, it was. Well. Really...pleasurable.” Thor smiled at him, warm and genuine, and brushed some of Steve’s hair out of his face. “It’s just...before, it was a lot more common-”
“You do not need to explain yourself,” Thor said, and before Steve could offer anything further, he drew him in and kissed him hard. Steve opened his mouth quickly, this time, put a hand at the back of Thor’s neck and tangled his hand into the long, slightly damp hair. “So!” Thor said, as Steve pulled back. “We will couple again?”
“Now?” Steve asked, because blood had only begun to return to his extremities.
“Whenever you would wish!” Thor said, laughing, and he pushed Steve so he was flat on his back. And then, of all unexpected things, placed his head on Steve’s chest. Steve bit at his lip. “I enjoy that gesture,” Thor added, looking at up at him. “You look most desirable when you do it.” Steve worked a hand through Thor’s hair, not entirely sure what to make of the fact that Thor was cuddling with him. That Thor was on his chest, looking up at him, smiling.
“Oh,” Steve said. “Thanks.”
“I feel most pleased that you would allow me this great honor,” Thor said. “And,
perhaps next time you might even enjoy if we were to reverse our roles!”
“Really?” Steve asked.
Thor propped himself up on an elbow and looked confused. “Why not? Why should I deny myself the pleasure of your cock?” He put a hand over Steve’s cock, rubbing gently before trailing the hand up to Steve’s jaw.
“I don’t know,” Steve said, honestly.
“You see,” Thor said. “There is no good reason why I would.”
No, Steve thought, I suppose there is no good reason why not. He relaxed enough to take a hand and guide Thor back down to his chest.
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All of your characters were amazing, but your Thor was absolutely pitch perfect. The whole thing was so sweet and funny and WONDERFUL.
Thank you so much for sharing this!!
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“Where’s Captain Ken Doll and Fabio?” Tony asked when Natasha, Clint, and Bruce came in, Bruce shuffling behind the SHIELD agents, and they indicated that Fury was on his way to talk with them. Also, why didn’t he get these updates? Though it was possible he did, but had just circumvented whatever system there was so that he didn’t get bothered by it...
Natasha gave Clint that look, the one that makes Tony a little nervous - a lot of what the pair do make him a little nervous, but he adopted his standard steely countenance to hide this. “They’re usually in the gym right now,” she said.
“JARVIS, are the Captain and Thor in the gym?”
“No, sir, they are not.” JARVIS replied.
“Well, what did they do, go out and get milkshakes?” Tony asked. He was pretty sure that Clint’s cough was concealing some sort of laughter, and narrowed his eyes in the archer’s direction.
“No, sir, they’re still in the building,” JARVIS replied. He was playing with him, too.
“So where are they?”
“They are in Thor’s room, sir. Shall I alert them their presence is requested in the living area?”
Tony wrinkled his nose, then noticed Bruce blushing. Really? he thought - he had completely missed that, and he was usually very good at discerning sexual tension and... but then again, the sheer improbability of their coupling had likely precluded him from noticing anything.
“You’ve been orchestrating this,” he said to the two agents. “Right under-”
“Orchestrating?” Clint asked, hand on his chest, doing his best government issued sincere look.
“Nudging,” Natasha corrected. “Not even. Just providing-”
“Helpful information,” Clint said, as the elevator opened.
Tony opened his mouth to say something, but Bruce shook his head, and since Bruce was better at these things than he was, Tony closed his mouth. He thought he should get some kind of extra-credit for not only recognizing one of his deficiencies but trusting someone who he had recognized as counteracting said deficiency.
Both the Captain and Thor were in their gym clothes, hair mussed, and appeared to have just engaged in some sort of exertion. Tony was sure it was very exerting.
“Sorry to interrupt your workout,” Natasha said. Thor grinned, and Steve momentarily look mortified before being able to regain his standard Captain America countenance.
“Fury’s on his way,” Clint added. “Probably with paperwork.”
“Wouldn’t he just send Son of Coul, then?” Thor asked. “Now that he is only allowed to perform on his desk.”
Natasha sputtered at this, and flashed a sideways glance at Clint, who closed his eyes and shook his head. Those two needed to be stopped, Tony thought. Also, Coulson would probably get off on paperwork.
“Gentlemen,” said Fury, as the elevator silently opened in front of him. “We need to have a discussion.” Coulson stood behind him, arms crossed, sunglasses on, while some SHIELD underling held two boxes of legal paper.
“Told you,” Clint said. “By which I mean to say, I told you all you needed to properly fill out those mission reports.”
“What is this you speak of?” Thor demanded, “And why should they interrupt-”
“Our work-out,” Steve said, quickly.
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“We don’t require Thor to fill out reports,” Fury said, “Considering. Well.”
“That is just blatant favoritism,” Tony said. “Just because-”
“If this is something required of warriors in this realm, then I will gladly fulfill my duties,” Thor said, crossing his arms and looking at Tony. This time, Coulson pulled the sunglasses down far enough to give Tony a very pointed look. Tony grinned at him.
“Great,” said Fury. “You do have some sort of conference room in here, right?”
“You’d really have to ask Pepper,” Tony said.
“It’s down the hall on the right,” said Natasha, her stride long as she led the way.
“And what, exactly, have you been doing in my conference room?”
“Our conference room, Stark,” she replied, not looking back. “After all, you said we had full run of the place.” They were doing naughty things in the conference room, he was sure. He was going to have to have JARVIS look through all the security footage.
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Thor was regarding the paperwork with disdain. The pen that Clint had passed towards him looked incredibly small in his hand.
Everyone else was, of course, looking at Steve. You should probably say something before Stark does, he thought, and so he coughed, and managed, “shouldn’t we get back to the gym?”
“An excellent idea,” Thor said, crumpling the paperwork in his hand and tossing it in the general direction of the waste paper basket. “We were there all too briefly for it to be of any benefit.” He stood and furrowed his brow at the looks that the two of them were receiving, then strode out the door. Steve pushed his chair back, perhaps much too forcefully, and then followed.
Before he was out of Barton’s eyesight, the archer gave him a thumbs-up and a grin. Steve just raised his eyebrows and nodded before darting out of the conference room, glad that the door was thick enough that he couldn’t really discern what was being said.
Thor had his arms crossed in the elevator which, if Steve recalled from the one time he had a romantic interest and had irritated her, was not a good sign. “Our coupling embarrasses you?”
“No,” he said. “It’s just...I’m not used to, uhm, coupling being so out in the open, being so...and especially since I’m pretty sure that they all knew about the fact that I had never-”
Thor’s arms relaxed halfway through his babbling, and he put one around Steve’s shoulder. “You are...shy, Steve?”
“Yes,” Steve replied, incredibly relieved that this was a word that existed in Thor’s vocabulary.
Thor pulled him close, and for just a moment, Steve was convinced he was going to get the other man’s fist rubbing into his head as he choked his neck. He had to inhale, to remind himself what he is, now. That the gesture was actually protective, and what does it say that he’s thinking that the divide between the two of them is precarious and might have something to do with why he-
“You are comfortable with our continued coupling?” Thor asked, as the elevator finally opened and they had to pull apart.
“Yes,” Steve said, quickly, feeling a little stupid for not considering that Thor might... be concerned. Want him enough to be concerned by this. He does what he would want, and stretched upwards so he can kiss the demi-god, hard, against the lips.
The elevator door closed, and they head upwards, though Steve didn’t really notice because, not only is the kiss deepening between him, but that this question, and his response, might mean that they were in a sort of relationship. Which had happened very suddenly, except, he supposed, they had basically been dating for a month since Thor had arrived and - oh! That’s what that term Clint used, bromance, meant, he realized.
The elevator door opened, and Steve glanced out the side of his eyes. Hadn’t they already-
“Oh, uhm, sorry to interrupt, there, I - next elevator...” Bruce stammered, and the doors closed again as they headed downwards.
“It seems this portal has not responded to our request,” Thor said. “We wish to go to the gym!”
“Yes, Thor, sir,” JARVIS replied, and Steve doesn’t care how many times Tony tells him that the computer is incapable of it, he can hear the sarcasm dripping in its tone.
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“I have a plan for this evening!” Thor said, offering him a hand. “We will gather again at six thirty. Perhaps you could wear the leather jacket you don when you ride on your small motor-craft?”
“Are you asking me on a date?” Steve asked.
“It is what one does with their partner in your realm, is it not? If not, then I object to being subjected to all of these so-called romantic comedies so that I might learn the mating rituals of-”
“No, no, it is,” Steve said, because he totally understood. “I would like that.”
Thor clapped his shoulder and grinned at him. “Perfect!” he said. “Then we shall meet at the elevators at the appointed time.”
It occurred to Steve, as Thor bounded off, that if you excluded all of the double dates that Bucky took him on - and really, to be fair, you had to - and the promise of a date with Peggy - which he wanted to hold onto, but for the purposes of this exercise, had to let go of as well - then this was his first date. Your first date is with an alien/demi-god named Thor that you have already..fucked. Who has a magic hammer.
He would probably have dwelled on that more if he didn’t realize, then, that Thor was in charge of planning this excursion, and that the possibilities were truly endless and mostly terrifying.
* *
For some reason, even though Thor had already seen him in a variety of states of disrepair, he took effort with his hair that evening and made sure to iron his pants. At some point, when he first moved in, Tony or one of his robots on Tony’s command had removed all of Steve’s old pants and replaced them with ones that “didn’t have waistline up to his nipples.” Steve had only got the old pants back on the condition that he never wear them out in public.
He arrived five minutes early, having run a variety of scenarios through his head about why this was a bad idea - primarily, he concluded, because if whatever Thor thought they were doing turned out to be terrifying, he had no knowledge of how to correct things.
Of course, worse came to worse, he could make a phone call - even if those were, apparently, taboo. And he would definitely call Pepper. She was probably the only one who would understand, since there were likely similarities between what he was about to embark on and being in charge of Tony Stark.
“Steve!” He turned, and smiled, and blushed slightly at the sight of Thor in jeans and a robin’s egg button down that highlighted his eyes perfectly. He had pulled back his hair, as well, and looked - Steve’s train of thought ceased, then, as Thor embraced him, cupping his ass, and then kissed him hard on the mouth. “Are you all prepared for our date?”
“Did I need to bring anything?”
“I am not aware of any need!” Thor said. “Tony Stark has offered us use of one of his servants this evening to take us to our destination.”
“A driver?” Steve asked, and Thor nodded.
It wasn’t the usual driver, which just made Steve shake his head at the thought of having multiple drivers - but he stopped, because he told himself not to do that with Stark, or anything to do with Stark, because despite the serum he would probably get a nasty headache.
As soon as they were in the car, Thor reached over and grabbed his hand and held it tight. Steve smiled at him, took a deep breath, and accepted the gesture. Both his parents had died when he was very young, and the only people who had really touched him after that were the doctors who his grandmother dragged him to to deal with his various afflictions. The ride was largely silent, except when Thor said to the driver, “You are taking us to the place that was arranged?” He got a curt nod in response.
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“Right, but what’s the last name?” she asked.
“Stark?” he guessed.
“Oh, Tony,” she said. The music was loud in the front of the restaurant. “I thought for a moment you were saying Thor.”
“I was,” Thor said, and Steve just gave her one of those trademarked smiles and she nodded at him. As they followed her, Thor grasped his hand again. Steve twitched, but then felt the other man squeeze back. “Look,” he said, softly. “Very few people have even noticed our display of affection. And if they have, it is with lust!” Thor laughed. “I am sorry, Steve. I did not mean to make you blush in public.”
“It’s...OK,” he said, realizing that it was. The waitress was instantly on them.
“Your finest-” Thor began.
“Beer,” Steve said, and smiled at him. Thor nodded, and it occurred to Steve that while one of them wouldn’t have stood a chance, the two of them could probably get out of this exercise relatively unscathed.
“Have you been to a churrascaria before?” she asked.
“The JARVIS suggested this would be a place where we would find most enjoyment,” Thor said. “They bring out meat on spears, and we may feast on as much of it as we like!”
“There is also a buffet with salads and side dishes,” she said, smiling at them through hooded lashes. “Just turn this disk over to red when you have had your fill,” she said, and gave them what seemed to be a very indulgent smile.
“We can eat all we want?” Steve asked. Thor nodded, quite pleased with himself.
“We can eat them out of room and board,” he said, and reached across to take Steve’s hand.
They made a good effort, and the waitress seemed to find the fact that they could eat as much food as they could charming. “So, are you two...athletes-”
“We are what is called-”
“Yes,” Steve said, nodding at Thor. “Yes, we are.”
“I thought you looked familiar,” she said.
Later, when Thor had excused himself to use the bathroom, she swooped in to clean off their plates. “So, is your...boyfriend?” Steve nodded, “From England, or something?”
“Something like that,” Steve replied.
“Lucky,” she replied, and suddenly Steve understood the whole point of the exercise - which, initially, had appeared to be a meat eating contest. Outside of their little bubble, it was much easier to relax into how he felt and how he wanted to express that. Their conversation had been easy, and Thor had been right, there didn’t appear to be anyone in the dining room who seemed overly conscious of them.
This was affirmed when Thor returned, gently placing a hand on Steve’s shoulder. Steve turned, and smiled easily at him, and then leaned in for a quick kiss. “Ah, you taste of meat!” Thor pronounced, smiling.
Steve reached his saturation point much sooner than Thor, but quietly suggested that it might be suspect for them to consume the better part of a cow - “and the chicken, and duck, and bacon, do not forget that,” Thor interjected - in one visit.
“Yes,” Thor said. “I have often been told that I am...conspicuous.” He stumbled over the word and shrugged his shoulders. Steve asked the waitress for the check and then wished he hadn’t. “You look faint, Steve, is something wrong?” Thor asked.
Steve handed him the bill. “I had no idea...food and beer could cost this much. I only brought-”
“No, no, I was the one who asked you for this date,” Thor replied. “I shall take care of the compensation due to his establishment.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a platinum credit card and slipped it into the leather check holder. “Tony Stark presented this to me when I indicated our plans for tonight,” he said, and for the first time, Steve didn’t mind the interference. “He told me to make sure we leave a tip of twenty percent, whatever that means.”
“I’ll take care of it,” Steve said, and on the line for gratuity, decided to give the waitress nearly fifty. It was like purchasing penny candy for Stark, he figured, and she had been sweet.
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