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THIS ROUND IS NOW CLOSED TO NEW PROMPTS.
ROUND TWO
closing at 5000 comments
Please read the [rules] before commenting!
PROMPT FORMATTING:
Alphabetize pairings. They will be archived that way!
Put [RPF] before RPF prompts.
Put [Crossover] before crossover prompts.
Please use this format: Steve/Tony, Tony needs help adjusting his arc reactor ; ( Read more... )
A man with short blond hair and a star on his chest bends down to talk to her. "Darcy, do remember any of what happened?"
She thinks for a few seconds. "Lots of blue light. It was really pretty."
"What about before?"
"Before what?"
"The explosion."
Darcy opens her mouth wide. "Something exploded?"
An even bigger man in a red cape picks her up. "Darcy! Do you know me?!"
"No. But I really like your hair." She grabs a chunk of it---it's long and thick and bright yellow and Darcy doesn't want to let go.
The red robot with a man's head starts talking. "She doesn't remember anything, Thor. We're screwed. In every possible position."
Cape-man gives her a big hug. "Then we shall care for her until she remembers! Or the S.H.I.E.L.D. scientists can fix her!"
"What if that doesn't happen?"
"It matters not---she is our friend and I, for one, shall not abandon her!" Cape-man pats her head. "What say you, Darcy?"
"Um, I like you, too." She starts pulling his hair and he laughs.
The robot-man puts his head in his metal hands and groans.
Darcy giggles. "He's silly!"
Star-man smiles. "You have no idea."
"This shall be great fun, I think!" Cape-man shouts. Darcy hugs him.
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and oh sweet baby jesus tap dancing on a matzo cracker! this is adorable!! I think I love you. And I cannot wait for more.
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"Your room is right across from mine. Always come to me if you need assistance," Uncle Thor tells her.
"Mmmkay." She nods and smiles at him. Then she flops back on the bed--it's the springiest thing ever.
---
Uncle Thor is definitely her favorite. He talks to her the most and he likes to wrestle ("but not too hard" like Uncle Steve tells them) and he makes her hair look pretty.
"Darcy, you must keep your head still," he tells her as he braids part of her hair.
"I wanna, but it's so hard. I like moving around." She sticks her arms out and flaps them.
"Well, if you keep still now, you can run around with beautiful hair later." He tied the end of that braid and started a new, smaller one.
"Oh, alright." She folded her arms and tried extra hard not to move.
Later in the afternoon, she shakes her hair around and the braids gently slap against her neck. "Look at my princess hair, people!"
"It looks nice, Darcy," Uncle Steve tells her. "Who did that for you?"
She holds her head up. "The super-secret hair fairy."
Uncle Thor winks at her.
---
She likes to look through Uncle Steve's book of drawings when he's not looking. There are some of Uncle Tony, Uncle Thor, and the other people who live in the house, but her favorites are of the people in uniform, especially a mustachioed man in a really round hat (his look makes her laugh) and a pretty lady with curly hair (she looks sweet, but kind of sad). The pictures are all in black and white, so Darcy takes out the giant box of crayons they gave her, and she fills them in, starting with the lady: red and purple and pink lips; brown, yellow, and red for different parts of her hair (Darcy couldn't pick); and brown for the eyes because Uncle Steve colored them dark with the pencil; and then apricot for her face. The colors crawl across the page, outside of the actual sketch---Darcy doesn't really like lines.
"Hey, I finished this one," she says, giving the sketchbook back to Uncle Steve.
He looks at the picture and frowns. Darcy thinks he looks a little scared, if grown-ups can get scared. "Darcy, this is not a coloring book."
"But you didn't color them. So I did it for you. The magic word is 'thank you.'" She smiles up at him.
His forehead crinkles and gets all those grown-up, worried lines in it. "No, Darcy. That was wrong. You did this without asking."
She hangs her head and juts her bottom lip out. "It was a surprise. I thought you'd like it."
---
There are three people in the house that she doesn't call Uncle (or Aunt): Natasha, Clint, and Bruce.
She thinks Natasha is the beautifulest woman in the world with her curly red hair. Darcy tries to make her own dark hair red with a Sharpie marker, but doesn't even show up. She also likes to watch Natasha spar with the guys---she can take them out with just her legs. Darcy twists her legs around one of her bedposts, and it hurts. She asks Natasha to teach her some tricks.
"When you're old enough to lift weights," Natasha answers as she does a handstand.
Darcy picks up a ten-pound weight with both hands. "I'm old enough. See?" She drops it, narrowingly missing her own left foot.
Clint is funny. He shows her how he shoots his arrows---he says it's hard, but Darcy thinks it looks easy. He also lets her watch movies like Star Wars.
"Too many monsters! Go back to the robots, please!" She covered her face with her hands.
Clint puts his arm around her. "It's okay, kid. This part's over quickly. And they gotta get past the aliens to meet Han and Chewie. Everybody likes them."
"Okay..." She puts her hands down.
She stays away from Bruce. Uncle Tony told her that if she got near him, she might make the world explode. She doesn't want to be responsible for another explosion.
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the braids!! and oooh steve... and ohh darcy, you'll learn.
adorable
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Steve is such the mother in this relationship. You're welcome, good work deserves praise!
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"So, are you really a robot?"
He groans. "Kid. I'm not a robot. This thing in my chest keeps me alive."
"So you're a cyborg. Clint said that if somebody has a robot part on their body, they're a cyborg."
"Maybe you should stop listening to Clint."
Darcy wrinkles her nose. "Why? He's nicer than you."
---
Uncle Tony has another house, right next to the ocean, and one day, everybody goes on a plane to visit him. It's really a trip for the grown-ups, but they take her anyway because Thor told them that they "very well couldn't leave her."
So while Uncle Tony tells all the grownups about some fancy new robot-thing he made, she sits with an invisible babysitter named J.A.R.V.I.S.
"Jarvis, are you friends with Uncle Tony or do you work for him?" she asks, munching on a cookie.
"Well, as he is my creator, I suppose it's a little of both," J.A.R.V.I.S. answers coolly. Darcy likes his smooth voice.
"Do you live here?"
"This is the only place I can exist, Miss Darcy."
When she gets tired of asking J.A.R.V.I.S. questions, she sneaks down to see Uncle Tony's billion gazillion cars. She runs down the rows with a the different shapes---she likes the smooth ones more than the squareish or sharp ones.
J.A.R.V.I.S.'s voice follows her. "Miss Darcy, you do not have clearance."
"So?" She climbs up into a sleek, silver car and pulls out her Ziploc bags of grapes and pretzels. "Hey, can you tell stories or something?"
"I believe my systems may be able to find some suited to your demographic. But I must warn you: if you dirty the interior, my alarms will go off."
She pops a grape into her mouth. "Okay."
A big, see-through screen with a picture of a boy in a dough airplane on it. "Our first selection is In the Night Kitchen, by Maurice Sendak..."
J.A.R.V.I.S. read her four stories before she asked another question.
"Jarvis, where are you?"
"I am here, with you, Miss Darcy."
She looked around from wall to wall, up at the ceiling, over the edge of the car door to the floor. "So why can't I see you?"
"Because I have no body. I am everywhere at once."
She chews on a couple of pretzels. "Jarvis, are you God?"
"No, I am not."
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"Jarvis, are you God?" and the super-secret hair fairy and watching Star Wars with Clint, who's nicer than Uncle Tony; I cannot handle this! XD Also, it's kinda funny to note that the three mortals of the team are the ones she doesn't call with familial titles. Huh.
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Also, it's kinda funny to note that the three mortals of the team are the ones she doesn't call with familial titles. Huh.
I did not think of that when I wrote, but you're completely right.
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After they get back, life in the mansion falls into a routine. A really busy routine.
In the morning, Darcy watches Sesame Street.
"Elmo's boring." She says while she pokes at her milk and Cheerios. "'Big Bird's World' would be better. Or 'Grover's World.' Or 'Bert and Ernie's World.'"
Clint looks at her and sighs. "Man, everything went down the tubes when they took Kermit off the show."
She wrinkles her nose and spoons up some cereal. "Who's Kermit?"
Clint groans and drops his head on the table.
*
Later in the morning, they usually start getting visitors, like Miss Pepper or Uncle Phil or Grandpa Nick.
Grandpa Nick is a tall, dark man who wears a black eyepatch and never, ever smiles---probably because he never learned how, Darcy decides.
"Hey, what do you think of this?" She hands him her latest drawing of a giraffe, an octopus, and the sun all smiling together. "It's my masterpiece. Until I think of a new one. Like Uncle Tony and his robots."
He stares at for a few moments. "It's...adequate for your age group."
"Thanks?" She'd have to ask what 'adequate' meant. But she has a more important question. "Um, Grandpa Nick, you're everybody's boss, right?"
"According to the government, yes."
"'Kay. So can you tell everybody to invite me to their pillow fights?"
Grandpa Nick's good eye blinked. "Invite you to their what?"
"Pillow fights. They have them a lot, but not all together. Clint and Natasha have 'em, Uncle Tony and Uncle Steve have some, 'cept when it's Uncle Steve and Uncle Thor, or all three, but their doors are always locked! And me and Bruce are the only ones who don't get to go! And it happens almost every night!"
He sits back in his chair and strokes his chin. "I'll talk to them about this. Today."
Darcy gives him a thumbs up and turns back to her crayons. "Cool! You're awesome, Grandpa Nick!"
"Indeed."
*
But the best is when Mr. Wilson comes to visit. He always wears a red-and-black suit and mask and he usually breaks a window when he shows up. Uncle Thor is the only grown-up who likes him because he's funny. Darcy likes Mr. Wilson because they have tea parties.
"More tea, Princess Helvetica?" he asks, lifting the pink plastic teapot.
"Yes, please, Princess Euphemia," she answers. He poured the water into her cup. "How are your cookies?"
"Excellent, dear, never better." He patted her hand. "Prince Comic Sans is a much better baker than Weasel or Alex. Or Bob. My friends are crappy cooks, come to think of it."
"We can give them his recipes."
Right then, Uncle Thor bounded into the room. "How goes the party, Darcy?"
"Fantastic! But Darcy isn't here. I'm Princess Helvetica."
He bowed his head. "Of course, Princess. I am sorry to interrupt, but the other members of this household have decided that it's time for Deadpool---"
"That's Princess Euphemia, dude." Mr. Wilson took a few more sips of his 'tea.'
"Yes, for Princess Euphemia to leave."
Darcy twisted her face into a pout. "Why?"
"Because he makes them nervous. I am very sorry, Princess Euphemia."
Mr. Wilson stood up. "Nah, it's alright, dude. I get it. I'll see you later, kid." Then he cartwheeled out the door."
"I love it when he does that," Darcy said. Uncle Thor nodded.
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but then there is WADE WILSON & A TEA PARTY. with Princess Helvetica & Prince Comic Sans omfg I can't handle this.
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