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THIS ROUND IS NOW CLOSED.
ROUND ONE
closing at 3000 comments
Please read the [rules] before commenting!
PROMPT FORMATTING:
Alphabetize pairings. They will be archived that way!
Put [RPF] before RPF prompts.
Put [Crossover] before crossover prompts.
Please use this format: Steve/Tony, Tony needs help adjusting his arc reactor ; Clint/Coulson, AU ( Read more... )
When interrogated earlier as to why he was lounging around the mansion in a green hoodie and a pair of jeans (which looked weird and frightening on a guy that usually wore stylish leather clothing or well-cut suits), Loki had simply threw his feet over one arm of the couch and replied, “I do what I want.” And that was that.
Normally, this would make the Avengers wary, but Thor didn’t seem concerned at all and Coulson was around along with Nick Fury to keep their eyes on the trickster.
What made that day weirder was when Loki flipped the channel to ABC where Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone was playing. Thor was hooked immediately and so was Steve, while Loki looked really bored.
Eventually all the Avengers assembled in the living room, sipping hot cocoa while watching the first Harry Potter film. Coulson and Fury even walked in and stayed to watch.
When the film finished, Tony was the first to speak: “Say, if we were all magical wizards and all-stop rolling your eyes there, Loki, it’s just a thought-what house do you think we’d all be in?”
“Slytherin, of course. Although I wouldn’t be nearly as useless and incompetent as that Draco boy was if I wanted to ruin Potter’s life,” Loki replied, still looking very bored. Figures he would be the first to answer.
“Gryffindor, for it is the house of the brave and the best!” Thor answered predictably. Loki rolled his eyes.
“I hardly think Gryffindor is the ‘best house’, Thor, but it is fitting for someone as reckless as you.”
“I’d be in Ravenclaw,” Bruce replied after a moment’s thought. No one disputed his claim.
“Huh...I don’t know, really. Gryffindor sounds like a cool house, so I’ll be in Gryffindor,” Clint chimed in.
“You in Gryffindor? I think you’re more of a Hufflepuff, Clint.” Clint swatted at Natasha playfully.
“Oh yeah? And what house would you be in? Slytherin?”
Natasha smirked and nodded, much to Clint’s dismay. “Why not? It is a house for the intelligent and the cunning.”
Loki gave Natasha a high-five for that.
“I think I’d like to be in Hufflepuff, actually,” Steve finally said. All eyes turned to him, surprised.
“Why not Gryffindor?” Tony asked.
Steve shrugged. “I don’t know, Hufflepuff seems to be full of swell people and they are hardworking.”
“No, you’d definitely be a Gryffindor, Rogers. Stop being so humble.”
“Ah, so you believe Gryffindor is the best house, brother!”
“Nothing of the sort, Thor, but I know a brave man when I see one.” Steve blushed at Loki’s words and cleared his throat.
“What about the rest of you?”
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“Gryffindor or Slytherin,” replied Fury.
Thor frowned at these answers.
“Why not choose one house? Surely neither of you wish to be a Hufflepuff or Slytherin.”
“Hey!” Loki and Natasha cried. “Slytherin is a fine and noble house!”
Coulson shrugged and went back to his coffee.
“It takes a great deal of cunning to run an organization like SHIELD, Thor. Slytherin may have some bad eggs, but it is still a great house for the ambitious,” Fury pointed out.
“Speaking of ambitious and cunning, don’t you think Tony would make a great Slytherin?” Steve asked.
Tony choked on his cocoa at that and put it aside.
“What? Me? A Slytherin?”
“Why not, mortal? Do you lack ambition or cunning?”
“Well no, but c’mon guys, I’m totally a Gryffindor! Look at the colours of my suit!”
“That makes no difference, Tony. You’re rich, privileged, ambitious, and run one of the largest corporations in the world.”
“Why thank you, Natasha, but that still doesn’t mean I’d be a Slytherin. I’m a superhero!”
“So? I’m part of the Avengers, too, and Director Fury runs SHIELD.”
“Yeah, but he said he could be a Gryffindor!”
“Tony, what were you like when you were 11?” Bruce asked suddenly.
Tony didn’t reply, glowering at all the gathered people in his living room. Everyone knew exactly how a spoiled rich kid like Tony Star was at 11; they didn’t even need to look into his records.
“Couldn’t I at least be a Ravenclaw?”
In the end, Loki enchanted a witch’s hat (that he may or may not have stolen from the local costume shop) and placed it on Tony’s head. Within seconds, the hat cried, “SLYTHERIN!” and within a second, Tony was screaming foul play because it was a hat enchanted by Loki.
He was still saying the hat was rigged even after everyone else got sorted as they expected (Coulson in Hufflepuff, Fury in Slytherin), but everyone ignored him as Loki proceeded to change all their clothes into wizarding robes with the right house colours.
Tony sulked for the rest of the evening, although while in the privacy of his own room, he had to admit, silver and green weren’t bad colours for him at all.
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...this is an awesome prompt and an awesome fill and you should feel awesome 'cause you are!
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Glad you liked. :]
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A++++
Man, I could write House sorting meta on characters all fucking day without pause if I had to, so thank you for writing this fic. (Steve's a Hufflepuff though, and I love that he wants to be) :D
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Steve is totally a Hufflepuff, the Cedric Diggory kind. 8D
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'Oh, you aren't going to be all annoying? Fine, I'm going to enchant a hat and have it sort us. So there.'
...I don't know. For some reason that popped into my head for Loki.
BUT I STILL LOVED THIS WITH THE LOVE OF A THOUSAND BURNING SUNS!!!
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[I caught you slightly shipping Steve-Loki, there~]
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Thanks for writing!
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So many thanks for this!
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