Happy New Year!
Some time around 11:40 I fell asleep on the couch in Green Bay. I rule. In all fairness, I had been up since 5am and on a plane or in a car for most of the day, but on the other hand, I had found some people to go out with, but I opted for couch time. I can't help wondering if this dedication to sleep over fun on one of my favorite holidays will be somehow prophetic for my behavior for the rest of the year.
Utah was fun, although I didn't get to ski very much because of the weather. More or less it rained one day then snowed the next, so we skiied just about every other day. It was also nice spending time with my family, however also stressful because I was trapped with no one else to talk to for 7 days, and forced into a rather limited space for that amount of time as well. By the end of the vacation I was itching to get home, and now that I am... Ahhhhh. Also, I haven't spent time with my cat since Thanksgiving, and I missed her. She's currently curled up beside me with her head resting on my arm as I type. Such a sweetheart.
I'm going to Chicago to see Ian tomorrow! Hopefully this upper respiratory flu(?) I brought back from UT will have cleared up more by then.
10 days cigarette free and counting. Plus being sick also helps deter an slipups that might occur now that I'm home. It seems weird to think that I will never again smoke a cigarette, but that's the kind of thought I've got to have. I have to get used to doing familiar tasks that once involved smoking without cigarettes now. It's truly is disturbing how cigarettes integrate themselves into your everday routine to the point where it seems strange not to have them there. This habitual association is probably at the center of their addictive quality. I'm not saying that I will never have another cigarette again... let's be realistic... but at the same time I need to reestablish patterns of behavior without them, and in order to do that I need to convince myself "no more, ever, period, etc." I'm already over the physical addiction (technically it only lasts 2-3 days, weird huh?) but its the habitual behavior that is difficult to break. This is the healthier option, and I know it, but I feel as though every now and then I still fight with my more easily corruptible side. I want to win this battle though, because really, if not now, then when will I quit?
I'll probably write more later... coffee's ready now.
Utah was fun, although I didn't get to ski very much because of the weather. More or less it rained one day then snowed the next, so we skiied just about every other day. It was also nice spending time with my family, however also stressful because I was trapped with no one else to talk to for 7 days, and forced into a rather limited space for that amount of time as well. By the end of the vacation I was itching to get home, and now that I am... Ahhhhh. Also, I haven't spent time with my cat since Thanksgiving, and I missed her. She's currently curled up beside me with her head resting on my arm as I type. Such a sweetheart.
I'm going to Chicago to see Ian tomorrow! Hopefully this upper respiratory flu(?) I brought back from UT will have cleared up more by then.
10 days cigarette free and counting. Plus being sick also helps deter an slipups that might occur now that I'm home. It seems weird to think that I will never again smoke a cigarette, but that's the kind of thought I've got to have. I have to get used to doing familiar tasks that once involved smoking without cigarettes now. It's truly is disturbing how cigarettes integrate themselves into your everday routine to the point where it seems strange not to have them there. This habitual association is probably at the center of their addictive quality. I'm not saying that I will never have another cigarette again... let's be realistic... but at the same time I need to reestablish patterns of behavior without them, and in order to do that I need to convince myself "no more, ever, period, etc." I'm already over the physical addiction (technically it only lasts 2-3 days, weird huh?) but its the habitual behavior that is difficult to break. This is the healthier option, and I know it, but I feel as though every now and then I still fight with my more easily corruptible side. I want to win this battle though, because really, if not now, then when will I quit?
I'll probably write more later... coffee's ready now.