(no subject)
it's been a long week.
i have a week and a half before the divorce...Phil's birthday is on Friday. he wanted the girls. so...if i get an address as to where his new apt is, then i'll let him have the girls.
i've been doing a lot of running around here lately. getting my life on track. switching my schedule to days during the week and my normal 1-11 every other weekend when he has the girls. daycare is pissing me off...especially La Petite...wanting almost 90 a week even with state approved assistance just for Xy alone. even if she's gonna be there for just a couple hours a day after school. they charge by the day. they don't care if it's just a couple of hours or a day here and there when her school is closed.
talk about wanting to rip my hair out. so tomorrow i'm going to make phone calls and see about finding another place that isn't so damned expensive. or uppity.
it's also been a long week because i've been missing Skotti...i haven't texted him today at all because the last couple days he's been gone, i had...and hadn't gotten anything in reply, so i'm guessing that he hasn't received them. he had said he would send me a vid of the ocean when he was in Florida next week. right now he's on a cruise ship with his parents.
his last words to me chastised me. don't think i've ever felt that ashamed of myself, and i've never heard him so angry. i pushed him to his utmost limit, and the man is a pillar of patience.
he was so pissed at me. but he forgave me, and our friendship is rocky, but it's still there.
hallelujah =)
i'm not chasing him anymore...I still would like a relationship with him, but after I'm fully ready. right now that's not looking like June. that's looking like January. after i turn thirty. and that part is up to him...when he decides to give himself another chance. he's been hurt too much, and he doesn't want to put his heart out on the line again.
i want to hug him and tell him that it's ok...
i still miss him.
i've had three sessions with my shrink, and he's come to the conclusion that i have anger and depression issues. well, duh. that would be the reason why i started to see him. so next time i go in, he'll have an official diagnosis as to what i am, and possibly start writing me a script. meds.
absotivolutely fucdiculously lov-o-ley. so what i really wanted, right? not really. but i was wanting the help. and life is too short to be continuously pissed off all the time.
so, looks like i'm going to be taking meds again. *shrug*
it's also been a rough week since Sam and Marie killed Chile. Marie has had severe asthma since it happened, so i'm guessing she got a face full of hair flick before Chile was pawed/crushed to death.
i'm not going to be investing in another tarantula for a while. i miss her, i need to clean her tank out and put it out in the shed for storage. i had her for eleven years.
well...i need to get stuff together for tomorrow morn, got a lot of stuff to do.
i have a week and a half before the divorce...Phil's birthday is on Friday. he wanted the girls. so...if i get an address as to where his new apt is, then i'll let him have the girls.
i've been doing a lot of running around here lately. getting my life on track. switching my schedule to days during the week and my normal 1-11 every other weekend when he has the girls. daycare is pissing me off...especially La Petite...wanting almost 90 a week even with state approved assistance just for Xy alone. even if she's gonna be there for just a couple hours a day after school. they charge by the day. they don't care if it's just a couple of hours or a day here and there when her school is closed.
talk about wanting to rip my hair out. so tomorrow i'm going to make phone calls and see about finding another place that isn't so damned expensive. or uppity.
it's also been a long week because i've been missing Skotti...i haven't texted him today at all because the last couple days he's been gone, i had...and hadn't gotten anything in reply, so i'm guessing that he hasn't received them. he had said he would send me a vid of the ocean when he was in Florida next week. right now he's on a cruise ship with his parents.
his last words to me chastised me. don't think i've ever felt that ashamed of myself, and i've never heard him so angry. i pushed him to his utmost limit, and the man is a pillar of patience.
he was so pissed at me. but he forgave me, and our friendship is rocky, but it's still there.
hallelujah =)
i'm not chasing him anymore...I still would like a relationship with him, but after I'm fully ready. right now that's not looking like June. that's looking like January. after i turn thirty. and that part is up to him...when he decides to give himself another chance. he's been hurt too much, and he doesn't want to put his heart out on the line again.
i want to hug him and tell him that it's ok...
i still miss him.
i've had three sessions with my shrink, and he's come to the conclusion that i have anger and depression issues. well, duh. that would be the reason why i started to see him. so next time i go in, he'll have an official diagnosis as to what i am, and possibly start writing me a script. meds.
absotivolutely fucdiculously lov-o-ley. so what i really wanted, right? not really. but i was wanting the help. and life is too short to be continuously pissed off all the time.
so, looks like i'm going to be taking meds again. *shrug*
it's also been a rough week since Sam and Marie killed Chile. Marie has had severe asthma since it happened, so i'm guessing she got a face full of hair flick before Chile was pawed/crushed to death.
i'm not going to be investing in another tarantula for a while. i miss her, i need to clean her tank out and put it out in the shed for storage. i had her for eleven years.
well...i need to get stuff together for tomorrow morn, got a lot of stuff to do.