confessions of a shopaholic, and an ex-mugger.
ever since settling in harvard, snugly connected to the university's web server, i've been gleefully feeding my guilty pleasure of online shopping. several times a day i visit websites like urban outfitters and forever 21, pathologically checking and rechecking if there's any steals. i can almost remember most of the items on their catalogue now - even the sizes, the colours - subconsciously.
of course i recognise the danger of this obsession, and i become particularly panicky when it becomes painfully apparent that i've lost most if not all motivation to study, to excel. i cower at the thought of USMLE, acknowledging that its level of difficulty might be beyond my reach, and i may not have the time to tackle step 1 next year. (indeed, i may have to take the entire exam after my clinicals, even then it may not be feasible for me to recall those arcane scientific details - what then? work in london? head back to sg? oh woe, oh my dreams hurt so much.) i skim through a few chapters of my finance textbook, understanding almost nothing, remembering none of those acronyms and equations, feel jaded and helpless, and close the book. i read the front page of the wall street journal which i dutifully subscribed to on the very first day here - still fresh with determination to face the massive unfamiliar world of economics - only to put the newspaper down after 5 mins, as though just tasted sour milk.
heh. heh.
so instead of treasuring my costly opportunity here, and gain as much knowledge as possible, i succumb to the inner shopaholic. the surge of evilness that is (arguably) present in all female species, frivolous and unproductive. i think women have become the weaker gender in today's societies precisely because of such distractions, in addition to the inescapable biological trap of childbirth. in any case tomorrow we'll be visiting wrentham outlet malls, where i have been instructed by dear mama to sweep as much stuff as possible, including 4 coach bags for her. i could burst out laughing just thinking about mama, waving her arms with ill-contained excitement the last time we visited an outlet mall in NYC together, ending the epic shopping journey with the purchase of 2 samsonites to transport the loot back home. perhaps my day will end in a similar fashion, i'll have to see.
one thing i must do after tmr is to tame this shopaholic in me, and declare 'enough is enough'. priorities must be rearranged in a rational fashion. rationality above all.
of course i recognise the danger of this obsession, and i become particularly panicky when it becomes painfully apparent that i've lost most if not all motivation to study, to excel. i cower at the thought of USMLE, acknowledging that its level of difficulty might be beyond my reach, and i may not have the time to tackle step 1 next year. (indeed, i may have to take the entire exam after my clinicals, even then it may not be feasible for me to recall those arcane scientific details - what then? work in london? head back to sg? oh woe, oh my dreams hurt so much.) i skim through a few chapters of my finance textbook, understanding almost nothing, remembering none of those acronyms and equations, feel jaded and helpless, and close the book. i read the front page of the wall street journal which i dutifully subscribed to on the very first day here - still fresh with determination to face the massive unfamiliar world of economics - only to put the newspaper down after 5 mins, as though just tasted sour milk.
heh. heh.
so instead of treasuring my costly opportunity here, and gain as much knowledge as possible, i succumb to the inner shopaholic. the surge of evilness that is (arguably) present in all female species, frivolous and unproductive. i think women have become the weaker gender in today's societies precisely because of such distractions, in addition to the inescapable biological trap of childbirth. in any case tomorrow we'll be visiting wrentham outlet malls, where i have been instructed by dear mama to sweep as much stuff as possible, including 4 coach bags for her. i could burst out laughing just thinking about mama, waving her arms with ill-contained excitement the last time we visited an outlet mall in NYC together, ending the epic shopping journey with the purchase of 2 samsonites to transport the loot back home. perhaps my day will end in a similar fashion, i'll have to see.
one thing i must do after tmr is to tame this shopaholic in me, and declare 'enough is enough'. priorities must be rearranged in a rational fashion. rationality above all.