Sun is helping...
But I am still finding it hard to crawl out of my cave. I have spun every day and have started doing yoga again seriously . I am sore.
I am feeling very anti social. not sure why.
This past weekend was ok. I had fun at Paul's party. Happy birthday Wookie.
You got off easy the other night...no sharp object in the ass!
Come to think of it, I dont recall any spanking either...
I went to A51 later to dance. It was ok until Dan came over and told me that I have to wear shoes from now on or I cant come back . I was so pissed off and hurt I nearly left. What the fuck? I couldnt figure out why this was all of a sudden an issue. I think someone just doesn't like me for some reason, even tho I barely know them. Health code my ass! When was the last time they were at A51? Honestly???
(Yeah. I thought so.)
I tried to breathe and remember to pick my battles wisely...even tho I couldnt help but take it absolutely personally... I was the only barefoot person in the club. After they closed I went and talked to Alan, seeing if he was gonna actually make me wear shoes or banish me. He said he was worried I'd get hurt. How long have I been dancing on his dancefloors?! I HAVE cut myself on glass and sharp dancefloor.
I HAVE been stepped on. I still dance anyway. I told him I accept entire responsiblity for myself, barefoot or otherwise. I told him I would never sue him or come back on him in any way. In the end he told me to BRING shoes even if I dont wear them. I could appreciate that. I was relieved somewhat. I dont think he cared one way or the other until someone else pressed a point...
WHY do you want to fuck with me? Just because you can???
"You...you ain't never spoke true...I shake an angry fist at you!"
All of this has gotten me to thinking that maybe the spell IS broken. I feel completely disillusioned. I dont like dancing over thereTHAT much anyway. My will to be stubborn and never go back fights with my obsessive dancing addicted -ness. Bets??? Maybe I'll just stay here in my cave and sleepsome more. Or become more serious about some other dancing options... ones that pay. Ones that make me feel like some other person gives a damn if I'm around or not. . Not that that is my point, by any means, but damn.
I have been fighting the urge to make a certain phone call every day for the last week. I haven't. ....
. He's still married. I'm still a fool. why is it that certain things DONT change??
Even shop therapy had little to no effect on my enjoyment levels today. I got some flourite to help me gain some clarity, hopefully.
I feel like I'm blown around by the wind inside.
Tonite I went and laid in a tanning bed for awhile, not for a tan but for bright fake sunshine. My ass is red now.
Blah-bity blah-bity blah...gotta love aloe,oo,oo
oh!
I am feeling very anti social. not sure why.
This past weekend was ok. I had fun at Paul's party. Happy birthday Wookie.
You got off easy the other night...no sharp object in the ass!
Come to think of it, I dont recall any spanking either...
I went to A51 later to dance. It was ok until Dan came over and told me that I have to wear shoes from now on or I cant come back . I was so pissed off and hurt I nearly left. What the fuck? I couldnt figure out why this was all of a sudden an issue. I think someone just doesn't like me for some reason, even tho I barely know them. Health code my ass! When was the last time they were at A51? Honestly???
(Yeah. I thought so.)
I tried to breathe and remember to pick my battles wisely...even tho I couldnt help but take it absolutely personally... I was the only barefoot person in the club. After they closed I went and talked to Alan, seeing if he was gonna actually make me wear shoes or banish me. He said he was worried I'd get hurt. How long have I been dancing on his dancefloors?! I HAVE cut myself on glass and sharp dancefloor.
I HAVE been stepped on. I still dance anyway. I told him I accept entire responsiblity for myself, barefoot or otherwise. I told him I would never sue him or come back on him in any way. In the end he told me to BRING shoes even if I dont wear them. I could appreciate that. I was relieved somewhat. I dont think he cared one way or the other until someone else pressed a point...
WHY do you want to fuck with me? Just because you can???
"You...you ain't never spoke true...I shake an angry fist at you!"
All of this has gotten me to thinking that maybe the spell IS broken. I feel completely disillusioned. I dont like dancing over thereTHAT much anyway. My will to be stubborn and never go back fights with my obsessive dancing addicted -ness. Bets??? Maybe I'll just stay here in my cave and sleepsome more. Or become more serious about some other dancing options... ones that pay. Ones that make me feel like some other person gives a damn if I'm around or not. . Not that that is my point, by any means, but damn.
I have been fighting the urge to make a certain phone call every day for the last week. I haven't. ....
. He's still married. I'm still a fool. why is it that certain things DONT change??
Even shop therapy had little to no effect on my enjoyment levels today. I got some flourite to help me gain some clarity, hopefully.
I feel like I'm blown around by the wind inside.
Tonite I went and laid in a tanning bed for awhile, not for a tan but for bright fake sunshine. My ass is red now.
Blah-bity blah-bity blah...gotta love aloe,oo,oo
oh!