melancholy
I feel really up and down and all over the place and i dont like it. obviously i am in love.
i really hate feeling like this. i dont like the jealous, confused, overwhelmed, scared, unsure version of myself. i dont like her at all. she isnt very fun to be around i can tell you. and i wish i was brave enough to tell her to go away. or to talk to the people (person) that i need to talk to to help her to go away. but every time i try... it doesnt work, or i cant make it clear enough, i get tongue tied, and they dont understand. i never get tongue tied. and i also feel like im being silly anyway. my feelings are valid damnit. i know that. i just cant seem to believe it. so all this is holding me back from speaking to them about it. also, i am not sure if speaking to them about it would be the right thing to do at the moment anyway...
i really hate feeling like this. i dont like the jealous, confused, overwhelmed, scared, unsure version of myself. i dont like her at all. she isnt very fun to be around i can tell you. and i wish i was brave enough to tell her to go away. or to talk to the people (person) that i need to talk to to help her to go away. but every time i try... it doesnt work, or i cant make it clear enough, i get tongue tied, and they dont understand. i never get tongue tied. and i also feel like im being silly anyway. my feelings are valid damnit. i know that. i just cant seem to believe it. so all this is holding me back from speaking to them about it. also, i am not sure if speaking to them about it would be the right thing to do at the moment anyway...