(no subject)
I just got home from a run. dripping wet. it may have taken me 6 weeks to get over the "first 3 weeks of training hell" but I think I am finally over it. it was actually fun. and I shaved almost 2 minutes off my time.
It was nice to just go out an run, and think about nothing. Just fall into a pace, pay attention to the way my arms are pumping, navigate the cracks in the uneven sidewalk. Nothing to serious, no big concerns, no soul wrenching cries to Jesus for something I know I can't have.
Last time I really trained, I did it in bitterness. Like I had something I needed to prove. It was like I had to prove I was good enough to myself. I needed to see if I could have mastery over something in my life when I felt so out of control. It wasn't very honoring to the Lord, it was all about me, but he somehow met me in it.
Not this time. My walk with Jesus is different now. He runs with me, and through me and he is there. We do it together. It feels like and honor to partner with the Lord. But also, it feels like a good fit, like it was what I was intended for.
It was nice to just go out an run, and think about nothing. Just fall into a pace, pay attention to the way my arms are pumping, navigate the cracks in the uneven sidewalk. Nothing to serious, no big concerns, no soul wrenching cries to Jesus for something I know I can't have.
Last time I really trained, I did it in bitterness. Like I had something I needed to prove. It was like I had to prove I was good enough to myself. I needed to see if I could have mastery over something in my life when I felt so out of control. It wasn't very honoring to the Lord, it was all about me, but he somehow met me in it.
Not this time. My walk with Jesus is different now. He runs with me, and through me and he is there. We do it together. It feels like and honor to partner with the Lord. But also, it feels like a good fit, like it was what I was intended for.