BEST DREAM EVER HOLY CRAP
I was in a, fittingly enough, Chinese restaurant, enjoying a meal, when this Chinese gang busts in, and is like, "Is there someone named Auto here?' and I was like, "... oh shit." and one of them heard me and raised a gun to fire, and I kicked a chair up in the way of the bullet while dodging the bullet. While he was like, "What?" I dove underneath the table, jumped over the next one, rolled and did a mule kick to his abdomen.
Another guy began throwing daggers at me, which slammed against the wall right exactly next to me, and started yelling, "You're dead, kid! Dead! Give it up!" and I was like, "... you underestimate me." in the best pissed off kung-fu master voice ever, and took off running, leapt onto the wall, ran across it, landed behind him ant started fighting him with my chopsticks.
He began getting annoyed of trying to fight me off and started going, "Dude, this is seriously fucking annoying here, quit!" and I was like, "... okay." and kicked him through a door.
And then a woman attacked me with daggers disguised as scissors, against me with chopsticks still. She stabbed at me, I didn't move, she came up short. She tried to scare me again, I didn't flinch. She made a stab right at my heart, and I displaced it enough with one hand for her to miss. She tried again and I neatly dodged and caught her dagger with my chopsticks. She got extremely pissed and her other hand slapped the chopsticks out of my hand, so I calmly bent down to pick them up, and she went to deliver a final move to stab the scissifes (Knifscors?) into the back of the head, but at the last moment I moved, so her knifes passed against my hair and centimeters to my face, slicing down the side of my nose. She was like, "Hah, almost had you there." and went to stab me, but I grabbed her wrist, and using her momentum, threw her headfirst into a wall.
I then wiped the blood off my face, spun my chopsticks, walked over, picked up a bowl of noodles and began eating with the same chopsticks. And that's how it ended, me in a destroyed restaurant with unconcious bodies littering it, enjoying some nice tasty noodles.
Another guy began throwing daggers at me, which slammed against the wall right exactly next to me, and started yelling, "You're dead, kid! Dead! Give it up!" and I was like, "... you underestimate me." in the best pissed off kung-fu master voice ever, and took off running, leapt onto the wall, ran across it, landed behind him ant started fighting him with my chopsticks.
He began getting annoyed of trying to fight me off and started going, "Dude, this is seriously fucking annoying here, quit!" and I was like, "... okay." and kicked him through a door.
And then a woman attacked me with daggers disguised as scissors, against me with chopsticks still. She stabbed at me, I didn't move, she came up short. She tried to scare me again, I didn't flinch. She made a stab right at my heart, and I displaced it enough with one hand for her to miss. She tried again and I neatly dodged and caught her dagger with my chopsticks. She got extremely pissed and her other hand slapped the chopsticks out of my hand, so I calmly bent down to pick them up, and she went to deliver a final move to stab the scissifes (Knifscors?) into the back of the head, but at the last moment I moved, so her knifes passed against my hair and centimeters to my face, slicing down the side of my nose. She was like, "Hah, almost had you there." and went to stab me, but I grabbed her wrist, and using her momentum, threw her headfirst into a wall.
I then wiped the blood off my face, spun my chopsticks, walked over, picked up a bowl of noodles and began eating with the same chopsticks. And that's how it ended, me in a destroyed restaurant with unconcious bodies littering it, enjoying some nice tasty noodles.