(no subject)
You know that feeling after you cry, when your body is exhausted and your chest feels water-logged? I have felt that way for the past two weeks.
I have no motivation to get out of bed, no motivation to go to work, or study, or do anything. If it weren't for the fact that I HAVE to go to work or I'll be fired, or for the fact that all of my exams have been changed to next week so I NEED to study, I probably wouldn't get out of bed at all.
I have been hit with the proverbial tonne of bricks, and it feels like it will be a long time before I can get back up.
First Dad has to undergo brain surgery, and then yesterday one of our dogs, of 13 years, died out of the blue. I have told Mark to run, because the way things are going it looks like he is next in line to have something bad happen to him, and I don't think I could handle anything else happening.
I moved all my exams forward to next week, so that I can get them out of the way to go up and be with my family. This means I have to cram all of my study between now and Tuesday, and I have 20hrs of shifts to do at work in that time. I can't take it. I have not enough time and not enough mental strength. But I have to do it, and it's killing me.
Fuck everything. I'm over it.
I have no motivation to get out of bed, no motivation to go to work, or study, or do anything. If it weren't for the fact that I HAVE to go to work or I'll be fired, or for the fact that all of my exams have been changed to next week so I NEED to study, I probably wouldn't get out of bed at all.
I have been hit with the proverbial tonne of bricks, and it feels like it will be a long time before I can get back up.
First Dad has to undergo brain surgery, and then yesterday one of our dogs, of 13 years, died out of the blue. I have told Mark to run, because the way things are going it looks like he is next in line to have something bad happen to him, and I don't think I could handle anything else happening.
I moved all my exams forward to next week, so that I can get them out of the way to go up and be with my family. This means I have to cram all of my study between now and Tuesday, and I have 20hrs of shifts to do at work in that time. I can't take it. I have not enough time and not enough mental strength. But I have to do it, and it's killing me.
Fuck everything. I'm over it.