ellie
Vodka is a very deceptive drink, because you drink it and you say, "Why are we drinking this? This is nothing, it has no smell, no taste! Why are we-Why are we on a traffic island?"
All I'm saying is that if you get-I don't know-a broom, say, and dip it in some brake fluid, put the other end up my arse, stick me on a trampoline in a moving lift, and I would write a better song on the walls.
1. Kristen Chenoweth’s guest appearance in Glee totally made the series worthwhile. April Rhodes, I love you more than I love Annabeth Schott and Olive Snook combined.
2. Bathurst people are hilarious drunken pieces of wonderful.
3. 42below passionfruit vodka is the yummiest alcoholic beverage ever. Particularly when combined with lemonade and headbanging to particularly awful 90s rock songs.
4. Hungry Jack’s onion rings are severely underrated.
5. My sister has type one (insulin dependent) diabetes; subsequently, there is now a ridiculously large supply of syringes in my house. Which is convenient if I ever get over my paralysing fear of needles long enough to become a heroin addict.
6. Everything sounds better when blasted from three separate stereos, all at full volume.
7. I am extremely good at both two- and three-player rummy, and absolutely shocking at blackjack.
8. I am a bad influence on people attempting to recover from a breakup. Although, it can’t be denied that my recipe of a disgustingly high-calorie binge + alcohol + chick flicks is effective, if somewhat detrimental to one’s overall health.
9. Gosford Hospital has been upgraded, and is now all fancy and shiny, and minus that horrific antiseptic smell.
10. There’s something about mid-afternoon vodka consumption whilst in pajamas make you question your life choices. For all of five minutes. Then you have a Black Books-esque moment in which you realise, in the midst of the alcohol and the nicotine and judging glances from your far more socially accepted loved ones - life is fucking awesome.