(no subject)
Right now I'm reading The Committment: Love, Sex, Marriage, & My Family
by Dan Savage. Dan Savage is best known for his "Savage Love" sex
column where he answers questions about group sex, the erotic uses of
urine, and how best to dump someone you don't like anymore.
This book is all about his thought process about marrying his partner at their 10-year anniversary, as well as the relationship he has with their 1st grade son. It's very smart, sweet, and interesting, and a lot of the things he considers are thoughts I've had about gay relationships. For example, one thing I apprecate about being in a queer relationship is the ability to define it with my partner instead of relying on society to explain the roles we both play. Of course, to a degree that's all bullshit -- I still struggle with who does the chores, who drives the car, and other "gendered" sorts of tasks that one member of a couple must do.
I've been reading this chapter about how there's allegedly a Gay Lifestyle (living alone, disposable incomes, multiple sex partners, a busy social life) that a lot of straight folks have adopted, while a lot of queer folks are adopting a Straight Lifestyle (long-term relationships, establishing a home, having children). Basically, to Dan this all means that there are no such things as Gay or Staight Lifestyles because we all do whatever feels best. Obviously.
Anyway, this is the statement that made me laugh out loud: "If we can't have marraige, can we at least have our neighborhood gyms, bars, and lifestyle back? Oh, and let's not forget about sex. When a straight girl fucks her boyfriend in the ass with a strap-on dildo, a gay angel gets his wings -- but I don't think straight people should get to enjoy sex acts pioneered and popularized by gays if we can't get married. Fair's fair, breeders. Back to missionary position sex for you."
This book is all about his thought process about marrying his partner at their 10-year anniversary, as well as the relationship he has with their 1st grade son. It's very smart, sweet, and interesting, and a lot of the things he considers are thoughts I've had about gay relationships. For example, one thing I apprecate about being in a queer relationship is the ability to define it with my partner instead of relying on society to explain the roles we both play. Of course, to a degree that's all bullshit -- I still struggle with who does the chores, who drives the car, and other "gendered" sorts of tasks that one member of a couple must do.
I've been reading this chapter about how there's allegedly a Gay Lifestyle (living alone, disposable incomes, multiple sex partners, a busy social life) that a lot of straight folks have adopted, while a lot of queer folks are adopting a Straight Lifestyle (long-term relationships, establishing a home, having children). Basically, to Dan this all means that there are no such things as Gay or Staight Lifestyles because we all do whatever feels best. Obviously.
Anyway, this is the statement that made me laugh out loud: "If we can't have marraige, can we at least have our neighborhood gyms, bars, and lifestyle back? Oh, and let's not forget about sex. When a straight girl fucks her boyfriend in the ass with a strap-on dildo, a gay angel gets his wings -- but I don't think straight people should get to enjoy sex acts pioneered and popularized by gays if we can't get married. Fair's fair, breeders. Back to missionary position sex for you."