Nov 18, 2007 14:46
Just got back from an adventure to get 2 bags full of Nat. Geographics for an art project Aaron & I are gonna work on=== a wall collage of what we want...to focus and meditate on...I'm focusing on CHANGE...REVOLUTION...ENVIRONMENTALLY SUSTAINABILITY...COMMUNITY...ART ect ect...
I've been meditating on what it is I really want out of life...its more than contented happiness...which I have right now for the most part...I'm working outside in a fairly sustainable field, adding beauty and green to the world with wonderful friends and a supportive family...but there is something missing---I want a revolution...I've found like-minded folks that have similar visions....We just need concrete direction and organization...This collage will put intangible, unorganized ideas into a vision.
If I really focus my consciousness this will happen- Tamihu- we're all connected! The Universe Conspires to our true hearts desires! (The Alchemist is my bible of the moment)
We went to the farmers market & got wonderful fennel/garlic/brocolli/local produce, its so great seeing the same cap. hill folks every weekend supporting sustainable local agriculture--I'm sad its the last one for a while, but season's change and we stocked up.
...
Sat night I got back from Emily's house(record extravaganza w/ her, Kevin, Marc, Robert and Toni)to find this gal on the couch...Whiz, Marshall & nieghbor Paul(w/ amazing doggie Frieda) all were on the porch. We chatted....I noticed she was holding something---MY tarot deck---NO WAY...I kinda freaked...then discoved mine still in my room--- it was Whiz's...A cosmic "coincidence"...I inherited the Crowely deck from my mom--He went through hell and back to get his....It is a deck that dispite initial skepticism organized my true feelings...and now has come to portend intense life events. Whiz and I are definately connected...mom thinks he was my brother in a former life or some such.
...
With more shared of my mom's past experiences our relationship is even closer...if that was possible. Honesty really is such a bonding tool. Its rad to see her as a complex person with a whole history before me & Crispin. I love being an adult and seeing my parents as equally emotional, experienced and flawed human beings. I love her so much, I wish she was in a better place and took better care of herself. Its hard with dad around...ugh. I'm glad I left Okanogan, but its hard to leave someone I love so much.
...
Hung out w/ Brenden the 1st time yesterday since we parted ways. It was really excellent to see him. We went to my friend Katies to ingest delicious thanksgiving fair--she is an incredible cook! The crowd generally is wierd for me-- accountants, Microsoftys, Lawyers in collared shirts and slacks and make-uped women who think acid is like heroin or something. It was great to have Brenden there since he shares alot of my outlook on life and doesn't make me feel like such a weirdo. Despite some sexual tension and sort of awkward parting I think we can do this friend thing...For some reason I think our random Hot Mama's meeting was intended...he needs to be a part of my life in some form right now...maybe its his creative energy or life outlook.
...
E-mailed Emory as well, and he is good, got poster of the week..AGAIN, I'm glad his focused artistic energy is getting him places. It makes me happy that I've gotten to the point that relationships can end, be accepted(WITH TIME)..and acknowledged as a great shared experience instead of focusing just on the negative ending.
...
Off to disect Nat. Geo's !! yesss!!!