(no subject)
I've met a guy at college.
He's really distracting, I have him in two of my lessons, and two lessons each day. Art and Maths. Graphics and photography are perfectly fine as long as I don't think about him, and those lessons are fine- apart from photography, who I swear is a nazi. But Art and maths are awful. The lessons are great, the people in general are fab, and the teachers are good, and already like me, but then in those lessons I have to try to concentrate and get on with my work. In maths this is proving to be difficult, seeing as he sits on my table. Opposite me. Gah.
I swear he's schizo though, as in maths we have a laugh at how pathetic we are at maths etc, and its nice, and I think maybe there could be a chance. But then in other lessons and when I've seen him around college and stuff, he blanks me, and it freaks me out. My friend says that he can relax more in Maths as he has his friends around him, so he can chat, but in the other lessons etc he's scared of looking like a tit (her word, not mine) and goes all hermit on me.
He seems to be such a nice guy! And not too smart, (I was being nosy in maths at the gcse results of the people on my table, and I looked at his, they're very similar to mine) so I don't feel intimidated by him in lessons.
Gah. Its unfair.
Why does this guy I like have absolutely no interest in me? I've put the effort into the way I've looked (not just for him) so unless I'm doing something completely wrong with the clothes thing thats not an issue, I put effort into my work, I have a laugh, I've been trying to make other friends, and I'm not a loner as I have a fair few friends from my old school either, so he can't think I'm antisocial and not approachable either.
Thats another problem, I've found out I can't make friends. I either over-nice people, or make sarcastic comments about teachers (like nazi lady and my second art teacher, follower of the photography teacher) but they are very rarely appreciated, and I feel completely and utterly stupid for saying what ever I do- that is, if I pluck up the confidence to talk to anyone. I'm rather glad that I have people I know from school there with me, I'm only starting to realise how hard it must have been for my sis, starting a college in a completely different part of the country. But then, I've never had the same amount of confidence that she has, so maybe it was easier for her, I don't know.
I've kept good contact with my besties from school, and hopefully seeing them this upcoming week. We've hardly been off the phone to eachother, texting in (and inbetween) classes in college, chatting on the phone and net in the evenings, its been great. I love them so so so much. I truely don't know what I'd do without them.
Its really quiet at college without them, as my friends who are with me are the quiet ones out of the group, so its kinda wierd. I miss them at college-thats why I've been texting them so much. Hope I don't loose contact with them, they are two of the only people I've shared pretty much all of my secrets, who understand my faults and love me anyway.
Bah. I need to dry my hair, otherwise it'll go all static and nasty.
I'll update soon. x
He's really distracting, I have him in two of my lessons, and two lessons each day. Art and Maths. Graphics and photography are perfectly fine as long as I don't think about him, and those lessons are fine- apart from photography, who I swear is a nazi. But Art and maths are awful. The lessons are great, the people in general are fab, and the teachers are good, and already like me, but then in those lessons I have to try to concentrate and get on with my work. In maths this is proving to be difficult, seeing as he sits on my table. Opposite me. Gah.
I swear he's schizo though, as in maths we have a laugh at how pathetic we are at maths etc, and its nice, and I think maybe there could be a chance. But then in other lessons and when I've seen him around college and stuff, he blanks me, and it freaks me out. My friend says that he can relax more in Maths as he has his friends around him, so he can chat, but in the other lessons etc he's scared of looking like a tit (her word, not mine) and goes all hermit on me.
He seems to be such a nice guy! And not too smart, (I was being nosy in maths at the gcse results of the people on my table, and I looked at his, they're very similar to mine) so I don't feel intimidated by him in lessons.
Gah. Its unfair.
Why does this guy I like have absolutely no interest in me? I've put the effort into the way I've looked (not just for him) so unless I'm doing something completely wrong with the clothes thing thats not an issue, I put effort into my work, I have a laugh, I've been trying to make other friends, and I'm not a loner as I have a fair few friends from my old school either, so he can't think I'm antisocial and not approachable either.
Thats another problem, I've found out I can't make friends. I either over-nice people, or make sarcastic comments about teachers (like nazi lady and my second art teacher, follower of the photography teacher) but they are very rarely appreciated, and I feel completely and utterly stupid for saying what ever I do- that is, if I pluck up the confidence to talk to anyone. I'm rather glad that I have people I know from school there with me, I'm only starting to realise how hard it must have been for my sis, starting a college in a completely different part of the country. But then, I've never had the same amount of confidence that she has, so maybe it was easier for her, I don't know.
I've kept good contact with my besties from school, and hopefully seeing them this upcoming week. We've hardly been off the phone to eachother, texting in (and inbetween) classes in college, chatting on the phone and net in the evenings, its been great. I love them so so so much. I truely don't know what I'd do without them.
Its really quiet at college without them, as my friends who are with me are the quiet ones out of the group, so its kinda wierd. I miss them at college-thats why I've been texting them so much. Hope I don't loose contact with them, they are two of the only people I've shared pretty much all of my secrets, who understand my faults and love me anyway.
Bah. I need to dry my hair, otherwise it'll go all static and nasty.
I'll update soon. x