Today is sucking hard.

[auroara]

I got to work and realized, as I was screaming loudly at the router located in another room, that I was a bit grumpy. I realized not too long after that, that I was in the full swing of PMS. My coworker came in and made silly jokes, bought me breakfast, and then got to work. I told her that I was grumpy and then I apologized in advance. I'm good like that. I rarely get grumpy, but when I do it's bad news bears.

My coworker soon got a call that her grandma was being rushed to the hospital. She, of course, ran to the hospital along with the rest of the family. You see, her whole freaking family is here in town because my coworker is getting married. Tomorrow. She kept me updated with the progress until we finally got the message that her Grandma had passed on. I thought I might puke.

My mother is about the same age as her grandma. They are not old ladies. They are young. They are older than me, but young by anyone's standards. I know that death is natural and as much a part of life as birth is, but intellectually knowing is not enough.

I also can't do anything to help. Part of me wants to bake something for her. Part of me keeps weeping (mostly my tear ducts, honestly.) Part of me just wants to shut down.