Many Many Thoughts
There are so many things I want to write in here... but finding the words is difficult... many times, I manage to think of them when I am not at my computer, which becomes quickly irritating... however... we shall start with some subjects from today and see where that leads me...
First of all... there appear to be two seperate opinions of me... half see me as wierd.. quiet, withdrawn... shy.. anti social.. the others see me as outgoing and bitchy.. strange combination ne? Well.. I shall try to explain this... I do not go out to talk to people. It is that simple. Chances are, I will not rush out to greet a person and meet someone new. That isn't my style... it's just not cool... If someone says hello to me, chances are, I'll say hello back... if they still refuse to go away... I may say more then 3 words to them. However, this is where the misunderstanding often starts... Let me put it like this... I will not freely offer information to people for the most part, superficial things, perhaps, simple things "I like pizza. I play role playing games. This class is boring" or a couple standard, boring career goals... "I want to do whatever". That is all... Things really not worth saying... those who want to know more, are very rarely freely offered the information... a select few close friends, whom I could easily count on one hand, may be offered some tidbits, or perhaps more, depending on how I am feeling and how close I am to them. The rest of the general population, may ask if they wish to know. Someone asked me today if I would answer outrageously personal questions if asked, and yes, yes I will. You can ask me whatever you want... and chances are, I will answer... but I will not justify my answers to you. This may sound bitchy... and odd for someone who really doesn't like themselves all that much... I don't like who I am, that is no secret, however, I am damn confidant in my moral code. I am comfortable in my value system, and I feel no need to justify my decisions to anyone but myself... So don't expect me to give a shit about what you think of me after you ask, if you don't want to know an answer because it may chance your opinion of me... then don't ask. Simple ne?
Other then that, hmm, basically, there isn't much else to say tonight... so I think I will hit the perverbial hay and see what comes up tomorrow to yammer on about.
First of all... there appear to be two seperate opinions of me... half see me as wierd.. quiet, withdrawn... shy.. anti social.. the others see me as outgoing and bitchy.. strange combination ne? Well.. I shall try to explain this... I do not go out to talk to people. It is that simple. Chances are, I will not rush out to greet a person and meet someone new. That isn't my style... it's just not cool... If someone says hello to me, chances are, I'll say hello back... if they still refuse to go away... I may say more then 3 words to them. However, this is where the misunderstanding often starts... Let me put it like this... I will not freely offer information to people for the most part, superficial things, perhaps, simple things "I like pizza. I play role playing games. This class is boring" or a couple standard, boring career goals... "I want to do whatever". That is all... Things really not worth saying... those who want to know more, are very rarely freely offered the information... a select few close friends, whom I could easily count on one hand, may be offered some tidbits, or perhaps more, depending on how I am feeling and how close I am to them. The rest of the general population, may ask if they wish to know. Someone asked me today if I would answer outrageously personal questions if asked, and yes, yes I will. You can ask me whatever you want... and chances are, I will answer... but I will not justify my answers to you. This may sound bitchy... and odd for someone who really doesn't like themselves all that much... I don't like who I am, that is no secret, however, I am damn confidant in my moral code. I am comfortable in my value system, and I feel no need to justify my decisions to anyone but myself... So don't expect me to give a shit about what you think of me after you ask, if you don't want to know an answer because it may chance your opinion of me... then don't ask. Simple ne?
Other then that, hmm, basically, there isn't much else to say tonight... so I think I will hit the perverbial hay and see what comes up tomorrow to yammer on about.