Too tired....
I'm very tired tonight. I got over-heated taking my kids to a late afternoon soccer clinic with the local pro-team, the Austin Aztex, and came home feeling absolutely crummy. My temp was 102 when I got in, oh yay
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Someone else on my flist went through the ordeal of nursing their mother through the final week or two of cancer a couple of months ago. She also posted about her mother refusing food, and someone said this in the comments to her, about their own experience:
The hospice people told us that refusing to eat and drink was the patient's way of deciding that they had enough and that they were at peace with moving on. Letting go of that was one of the hardest things for me. I desperately needed to make sure that she was properly fed and hydrated. But, letting go of that in the end was a blessing. It stopped making her so miserable and it was the right thing to do in her situation.
It's going to be difficult for all of you. I lost my grandmother the other year to strokes and dementia, and you always feel like you should be doing 'something' to fix it somehow. As hard as it is, there comes a time when there's nothing you can do to fix it, and in fact, trying to fix it is like trying to stop the tide. Death is the natural conclusion, and though letting go is horrible, especially when it's someone who's been such a strong figure in your life, sometimes it's the respectful thing to do. Sometimes it's the best thing you can do to let the person know that it's all right to stop hanging on for those around them.
Sorry, this is probably all rambling and incoherent.
*gives you big hugs, tea and chocolate*
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He's doing a little better. Not great, but he's trying to eat again. We will just have to see where it goes from here.
Thank you so much, for everything!
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