Top Ten TV Decisions that Make Me Want to Punch Someone
So since misreallhad to go out of town this weekend she did three lists in a row.
(You should really check out her Ways My Life Should Be Like a Sitcom list. It rocks.)
Anyway, my turn now. We'll be back on our regular schedule on Tuesday.
1. The Jay Leno Show
Leno moves to prime time and slices four hours of scripted drama from NBC. And then when they realized what a huge mistake it was, Leno took back the Tonight Show and shafted Conan in the process. I blame the cancellation of Life on this one.
2. HBO cancels Deadwood between seasons
It's not so much that they canceled it, they did it after the third season was already in the can. Which means that the best show in television history (it's my list, just accept it) got the most unsatisfying end imaginable and all the plotlines built in the third season to be resolved in the fourth were just left hanging.
3. The laugh track on the first season of Sports Night
I thank gatsbyfanfor reminding me of this one. It's not just that a canned laugh track clashes horribly with dialogue that intelligent and witty. It's that the people who controlled it didn't know what was funny.
4. Adding a fourth judge to American Idol
My relationship with Kara Dioguardi is, shall we say, complex. On the one hand, she often had a very annoying manner and delivered her critiques in a style that convinced me she had rehearsed them in the bathroom mirror. On the other hand, she gave the most thoughtful, specific, useful feedback that show has ever seen. But the bottom line is that, flawed as it was, the Simon/Paula/Randy combo was some perverted kind of magic and it was a stupid idea to mess with it.
5. Everything about the "new" American Idol other than Ryan Seacrest
J-Lo seemed like she was going to be good there, for awhile. And Steven Tyler was a hoot. But suddenly the judging became an absolute joke, which reached its peak one week when every single one of the ten singers got nothing but glowing praise. It was the everbody-gets-a-gold-star method of judging, which later turned into everybody-but-Haley-Reinhart-gets-a-gold-star. I can handle Steven. I just figure he's the new Paula and he can say any hilarious, loopy shit he wants. But J-Lo and Randy? They have me ready to build a shrine of love and remorse to Kara.
6. The writer's strike
Pushing Daisies was the hot new show. It had great ratings, all the critics were talking up its clever, quirky, innovative self. The the writer's strike happened and when it was finally resolved, PD seemed to have lost the wind from its brightly-colored sails.
7. Russell T. Davies
Okay, he's a person and not a decision. But I really want to punch him. Like, a lot.
8. The finale of Lost
You fucking assholes. Really? You give us six seasons of the most riveting, confusing, tightly-plotted sci-fi drama ever... and you end it in the motherfucking AFTERLIFE? We're supposed to be satisfied that all the couples who were ripped apart (let's see, that would be ALL OF THEM) and all the children who grew up without parents (again, ALL OF THEM) were reunited after they died? If we go by that formula, Romeo & Juliet could have ended on a high note.. I wasn't even asking for a storybook ending. But I think we deserved something less lame than everybody-dies-but-they're-happy-in-heaven.
9. Reality show winners who shouldn't have won
I'm not talking Kris vs. Adam kind of stuff. For one thing, even though I think Adam should have won, Kris is the bees knees and I'm happy for him. And for another thing, this decision was left in the often incomprehensible and unreliable hands of the Viewing Public. There's no accounting for what they do sometimes. No, I'm talking about shows where a panel of judges selects the less-talented and less-likeable of two finalists to take home the big prize. Ilan Hall wins Top Chef? Are you kidding me? He plagiarized everything he did from the Spanish restaurant he worked at before the show and he was a fucking ASSHOLE to boot. Project Runway's had a few of them. Chloe beat Daniel in Season 2, Jefferey CHEATED and beat Uli in Season 3, and in the most egregious decision, Gretchen beat Mondo in Season 8.
10. Shows gone too soon
Life, Pushing Daisies, Sports Night, Firefly, Terriers, Veronica Mars, Boomtown, Dresden Files... the list goes on. As I'm sure you'll all prove to me in the comments.
(You should really check out her Ways My Life Should Be Like a Sitcom list. It rocks.)
Anyway, my turn now. We'll be back on our regular schedule on Tuesday.
1. The Jay Leno Show
Leno moves to prime time and slices four hours of scripted drama from NBC. And then when they realized what a huge mistake it was, Leno took back the Tonight Show and shafted Conan in the process. I blame the cancellation of Life on this one.
2. HBO cancels Deadwood between seasons
It's not so much that they canceled it, they did it after the third season was already in the can. Which means that the best show in television history (it's my list, just accept it) got the most unsatisfying end imaginable and all the plotlines built in the third season to be resolved in the fourth were just left hanging.
3. The laugh track on the first season of Sports Night
I thank gatsbyfanfor reminding me of this one. It's not just that a canned laugh track clashes horribly with dialogue that intelligent and witty. It's that the people who controlled it didn't know what was funny.
4. Adding a fourth judge to American Idol
My relationship with Kara Dioguardi is, shall we say, complex. On the one hand, she often had a very annoying manner and delivered her critiques in a style that convinced me she had rehearsed them in the bathroom mirror. On the other hand, she gave the most thoughtful, specific, useful feedback that show has ever seen. But the bottom line is that, flawed as it was, the Simon/Paula/Randy combo was some perverted kind of magic and it was a stupid idea to mess with it.
5. Everything about the "new" American Idol other than Ryan Seacrest
J-Lo seemed like she was going to be good there, for awhile. And Steven Tyler was a hoot. But suddenly the judging became an absolute joke, which reached its peak one week when every single one of the ten singers got nothing but glowing praise. It was the everbody-gets-a-gold-star method of judging, which later turned into everybody-but-Haley-Reinhart-gets-a-gold-star. I can handle Steven. I just figure he's the new Paula and he can say any hilarious, loopy shit he wants. But J-Lo and Randy? They have me ready to build a shrine of love and remorse to Kara.
6. The writer's strike
Pushing Daisies was the hot new show. It had great ratings, all the critics were talking up its clever, quirky, innovative self. The the writer's strike happened and when it was finally resolved, PD seemed to have lost the wind from its brightly-colored sails.
7. Russell T. Davies
Okay, he's a person and not a decision. But I really want to punch him. Like, a lot.
8. The finale of Lost
You fucking assholes. Really? You give us six seasons of the most riveting, confusing, tightly-plotted sci-fi drama ever... and you end it in the motherfucking AFTERLIFE? We're supposed to be satisfied that all the couples who were ripped apart (let's see, that would be ALL OF THEM) and all the children who grew up without parents (again, ALL OF THEM) were reunited after they died? If we go by that formula, Romeo & Juliet could have ended on a high note.. I wasn't even asking for a storybook ending. But I think we deserved something less lame than everybody-dies-but-they're-happy-in-heaven.
9. Reality show winners who shouldn't have won
I'm not talking Kris vs. Adam kind of stuff. For one thing, even though I think Adam should have won, Kris is the bees knees and I'm happy for him. And for another thing, this decision was left in the often incomprehensible and unreliable hands of the Viewing Public. There's no accounting for what they do sometimes. No, I'm talking about shows where a panel of judges selects the less-talented and less-likeable of two finalists to take home the big prize. Ilan Hall wins Top Chef? Are you kidding me? He plagiarized everything he did from the Spanish restaurant he worked at before the show and he was a fucking ASSHOLE to boot. Project Runway's had a few of them. Chloe beat Daniel in Season 2, Jefferey CHEATED and beat Uli in Season 3, and in the most egregious decision, Gretchen beat Mondo in Season 8.
10. Shows gone too soon
Life, Pushing Daisies, Sports Night, Firefly, Terriers, Veronica Mars, Boomtown, Dresden Files... the list goes on. As I'm sure you'll all prove to me in the comments.