6. 20 ( in which I may love Show forever)
Seriously, this, this is why Show will always be my forever girl. Also further proof that the writers are in your f-list, it's literally like fandom wrote this episode, it is the most glorious mash up of the best hiatus fics from last year. Cas being there all the time, anyone?
I went into this episode with a sense of dread, like I was going to witness the beginning of the end for my OTP but I left feeling strangely hopeful, even as the episode broke my heart, more on that later.
CAS. OH CASSSSSSSS. THE PARK BENCH.
DON'T STEP ON THE FISH, THERE ARE BIG PLANS FOR THE FISH. So, SPN clearly not going down the 7 days route then. OH HAI RUDIMENTARY OLD TESTAMENT RECAP. RANDOM TOWER OF BABEL INSULT, DAVID AND GOLIATH lolll
Small point, I love how he looks at his hands as he begins the narration, it's just so telling, him wondering how these hands could've done the things he's been doing recently. Oh, Cas.
'What if I've made the wrong choice? How am I supposed to know?' I DON'T KNOW CAS, I DON'T KNOW. This episode was brilliant for showing the turmoil of the angels, without this purpose of creating the apocalypse they are so completely lost.
And sure Cas is there to lead them, but truth be told it's a case of the blind leading the blind, he doesn't know what to do, he has sketchy images of being the hero and so much expectation of his shoulders that he's doing the best he can.
The thing is it's never really explained why working with Crowley is such a bad thing, sure it's working with a demon but aside from the natural stigma attatched to it, it seems not that bad. Ironically, all this hurt and destruction has been caused by Cas' guilt and him trying to cover up his 'dirty little secret'. To paraphrase 'The Good Wife' it's not the mistake that the people can't forgive, it's the cover up'. Certainly this seemed to be the case with Dean. The obvious fallout from all this covering up business is Rachel, seeing her all hopeful and determined just highlighted what she became and what cas did to her, she seemed a whole lot less bitter in this episode than when we saw her last, his conflicted feelings about fight the war, or be with the Winchesters seemed to be grating on her too. Btw did you see that angel extra who was staring at Cas with hearts in her eyes? Was is acting or is she just in love with Misha? I couldn't tell.
Crowley, God I love it when he gets shouty, Mark Sheppard was pretty stellar in this but then again he always is. The thing about Crowley ( and Ruby to some extent I suppose early in S3) is that what he's offering doesn't seem so wrong.
Can we just talk about Demon!Bobby for a second? I LOVE THAT GUY. FBI THOMAS. ROWS OF GOBLETS FILLED WITH BLOOD. OUT THE BACk (IDJITS). Which naturally leads to Cas being the world's biggest badass, check him out with the double smiting and the ninja moves. HOT DAYUM.
Dean, oh Dean. Oh, OTP of epicness. I loved the entire episode ( though Sam would die for Cas? I love my Sassy an' all but when did this happen?) but the D/C was off the charts, man. Dean finally realising that Cas was upt ot somethingwas the most upsetting thing- and it stemmed from Cas FINALLY understanding and using (!) a pop culture reference, homeboy cannot catch a break.
The single mosts painful thing for me was seeing those angel wards on the windows, I never thought the day would come when Cas wouldn't be welcome in their lives. I know the Sam and Bobby heart broken at Cas' team change was a little tneous but all of them have been there for Cas ( maybe Sam less so, but let's not forget he was pretty in awe of him for a long time), Bobby was starting to extend his surrogate father orl to Cas and witnessing his blatant betrayal must have been painful for them too. BUT DEAN , OH DEAN.
THEIR BOND IS CLEARLY MORE PROFOUND THAN I ANTICIPATED.
YOU'RE LIKE A BROTHER TO ME
YOU'RE LIKE A BROTHER TO ME
YOU'RE LIKE A BROTHER TO ME
BROTHER
BROTHER
BROTHER
YOU ME
GAWD I LOVE IT WHEN THEY VALIDATE MY THOUGHTS IN CANON, I FEEL THE LOVE SERA AND BEN. I FEEL IT.
I did not expect Dean to be so forgiving actually, he was harder on Sam, and since it's now clear Sam's soul has something to do with this, I was shocked, over the moon at how Dean thre Cas some rope. OH CAS, WHEN WILL YOU LEARN? YOU DON'T HAVE TO GO IT ALONE!
FINALE TIME. OH GOD, I WILL BE CRUSHED. AGAIN.
Though the message to take away from this ( at least for me) was that cas will find redemption, whether he can find it in himself to walk away and face the music for what he's done, (PLEASE LET HIM FALL. PLEASE LET HIM FALL. PLEASE LET HIM FALL. PLEASE LET HIM FALL. PLEASE LET HIM FALL. PLEASE LET HIM FALL. PLEASE LET HIM FALL. PLEASE LET HIM FALL. PLEASE LET HIM FALL. PLEASE LET HIM FALL. PLEASE LET HIM FALL. PLEASE LET HIM FALL. ) or whether he's going to be absolved by God remains to seen, but given this episode I don't think that we'll be seeing the end of D/C anytime soon, say all you want about 'I've got to do I what I've got to do' Dean but I think it's pretty clear from this episode that at the end of the day you can't let your angel go.
'i did it all for you, because of you,' this sentiment has been expressed before by Cas under different circumstances and Dean was very bluff about it but I wonder is that how he really felt? We know that Dean has a tendency to feel guilty for the mistakes of the people around him, especially his family and now he's expressed Cas to be as such, Dean must feel the burden of knowing that he did encourage to doubt. Dean did give Cas freedom, if not directly then atl east he showed him that he could have freedom, if he chose. Now clearly Dean didn't make the decisions for Cas and he doesn't share in any of the blame for what Cas has felt he had to do but will Dean feel this way? It'll be interesting to see how exactly it is that he goes about trying to stop Cas, and at the end of the day he is just a man and one with deep feelings about the nagel he's sworn to stop at that. OH DEAN.
On a more cinematic level, I was loving the noir-y feel to this, the noir is being amped up as we round off the season I guess. This season, man, I don't even know. The first half was mediocre at best, save for a couple of episodes and this half well, I feel like it would've enjoyed it so much more if the first half had built up the arc more, the overactive fannish mind can only fill in so mnay gaps. Maybe the season will be better as a marathon, is this Sera getting into her stride? Was is always intended like this, slow ( sometimes painfully so) at the beginning and increasingly intense towards the end? IDK.
Hopefully what's going on with Sam's soul will be explained the week after next and we'll get a satisfying ending even if it causes a flood of tears. I might do some more thinky thoughts on Heaven, I had quite a lot of feelings about that
Over all, I think the episode was brilliant, I loved it , there was so much hype and we all built it up in our minds so much that on some level something had to give somewhere, but on the D/C count it defnitely surpassed my expectations, and to be fair, something with that amount of Casface in it couldn't possibly have underwhelmed me. :D
ETA: Check out this beautiful vid by ashdoode about the D/C in this ep 'And we wake up in the breakdown in the things we never thought we could be' Oh, Goo Goo Dolls, how so perfect?! ;___;