Update
Well, I really should have been posting all along. Now there is way too much to catch up on and unfortunately very little of it good.
As many know I have been having some fairly serious problems with a roommate (not M, she is still awesome sauce). This roommate may still get us evicted but so far she seems satisfied with costing me some serious money (if we get evicted, I will lose almost $8,000 dollars because of her to date and I will not be able to find another place to live). Now said roommate is single and inviting men to the house on nights the baby is home for what I can only dub "booty calls". They show up, go into her room for an hour, moan alot and she walks them out with 'sex hair'. She may be a prostitute,but I think it is more likely she is just very lonely. Lord knows, it's not the activity I disapprove of. I've done worse. I've just never brought it into a family home. And her choice of partners is dubious at best. The last one cause Rowen to move the huge, heavy cat tree to just inside the baby's door for the night. The baby is at Gma's EVERY Thursday night and at Father's every Sat (overnight every other sat.) She has yet to have one of these dates on those nights. Oddly enough it tends to be Sunday and Wednesday nights. In the last 6 days, I have come home to find the door unlocked and the house empty 4 times. When I mention this, she shrugs. I don't even know what to do anymore. I'm probably going to have to sue her for past rent/deposit/utilities owed. The leasing company won't evict just her, even though she is the only one they have a problem with. She was even stupid enough to admit to having a skunk in writing when they had nothing but the brief glance of a stoned repairman to go on. They could have proved nothing without written affidavids from multiple, reliable sources or pictures. To get pictures they would need a court order to enter and search the house and any judge would through the request out after seeing photos of my big, fluffy, black and white long haired cat who is identified on the lease. So she had to give up the skunk and I know she is blaming me for that. She hasn't said a single civil thing to me or Rowen Since he moved here (Dec.6) so I cannot correct this perception. I honestly don't care anymore, she blames me for everything else that is wrong with her life. She can keep being a victim, I'm done.
In late Dec. Rowen and had a few problems but it was mostly over in a week. I thought it was going to be a much bigger deal than it was. He is a much better person than I am.
I lost my job Dec. 6th. Oddly enough it may be good for me. I was working 12 hour shift and losing my mind for $11 an hour. Now I make $1500 a month on unemployment. Recently, I got a temp to hire 9-5:30 job for $14 an hour, but I'm hoping I get a $17.57 an hour job at UCI. All the school holiday breaks and killer benefits. Plus, for working there before I already have 18 months in to my retirement. 18.5 year till pension eligibility. Mostly, I love spending more time with the baby.
My aunt died and two of my mom's cousin's died in the same weekend.
My mother admitted she does not remember most of the time she was married to my Father or Step-father, aka my childhood. Now I have no chance of getting context or a linear understand of the things that happened. Oh, and both men had been married before mom and I never knew.
My car sounds like shit and it will probably be a month before I can have anyone look at it.
On Tuesday I took my dog to the vet. In a weird coinscidence a golden retrevier walked up to my back door as I was trying to leave. I put him in the garage with food and water and called the owner. When the owner came he reminded me of a child molester, Normal looking, very rich suburby, but unidentifiably creepy somehow. He mentioned the dog has run away a few times before. As he walked away from the house, the dog stopped and didn't want to go. He hit the dog hard in the middle of the back and violently dragged it away. I don't think the guy knows I saw. If that dog makes it back to me, it is disappearing.
This morning I had to deal with the fact my ex lies to me, tries to teach the baby to lie to me, dresses her in boys underwear and makes he feel ashamed of herself to the point that the nightmares have returned (though, thank g-d not as bad as before). I am continuely grateful for the baby's therapist. She handles the ex very well and I am very proud of myself for the way I dealt with the situation. I do have to admit, the fact he knows the court ordered him to stop this behavior once before does help my cause.
But mostly, I'm dealing with having to put my dog down today. He was wonderful and loving. He knew his job was to take care of the baby and he did it with calm reliability. Even M, who was bravely dealing with her long standing terror of dogs, loved him and would take him on walks alone sometimes. He was in alot of pain and had begun having seizures so I know it was the right thing to do ,but still holding him at the vet today was hard. He was loving and cuddling to the last second. My mom and Rowen were there and that definatly helped. It was oddly comforting to see Rowen cry for Patch. He is a good man and even though he only knew Patch for 6 weeks, he really loved that dog. My cats have spent the day following me around a cuddling with me. That has been very helpful as well.
I'm sorry this post is so poorly written; I don't have the strength for eloquince (or decent spelling).
I'll try to be happier next time.
As many know I have been having some fairly serious problems with a roommate (not M, she is still awesome sauce). This roommate may still get us evicted but so far she seems satisfied with costing me some serious money (if we get evicted, I will lose almost $8,000 dollars because of her to date and I will not be able to find another place to live). Now said roommate is single and inviting men to the house on nights the baby is home for what I can only dub "booty calls". They show up, go into her room for an hour, moan alot and she walks them out with 'sex hair'. She may be a prostitute,but I think it is more likely she is just very lonely. Lord knows, it's not the activity I disapprove of. I've done worse. I've just never brought it into a family home. And her choice of partners is dubious at best. The last one cause Rowen to move the huge, heavy cat tree to just inside the baby's door for the night. The baby is at Gma's EVERY Thursday night and at Father's every Sat (overnight every other sat.) She has yet to have one of these dates on those nights. Oddly enough it tends to be Sunday and Wednesday nights. In the last 6 days, I have come home to find the door unlocked and the house empty 4 times. When I mention this, she shrugs. I don't even know what to do anymore. I'm probably going to have to sue her for past rent/deposit/utilities owed. The leasing company won't evict just her, even though she is the only one they have a problem with. She was even stupid enough to admit to having a skunk in writing when they had nothing but the brief glance of a stoned repairman to go on. They could have proved nothing without written affidavids from multiple, reliable sources or pictures. To get pictures they would need a court order to enter and search the house and any judge would through the request out after seeing photos of my big, fluffy, black and white long haired cat who is identified on the lease. So she had to give up the skunk and I know she is blaming me for that. She hasn't said a single civil thing to me or Rowen Since he moved here (Dec.6) so I cannot correct this perception. I honestly don't care anymore, she blames me for everything else that is wrong with her life. She can keep being a victim, I'm done.
In late Dec. Rowen and had a few problems but it was mostly over in a week. I thought it was going to be a much bigger deal than it was. He is a much better person than I am.
I lost my job Dec. 6th. Oddly enough it may be good for me. I was working 12 hour shift and losing my mind for $11 an hour. Now I make $1500 a month on unemployment. Recently, I got a temp to hire 9-5:30 job for $14 an hour, but I'm hoping I get a $17.57 an hour job at UCI. All the school holiday breaks and killer benefits. Plus, for working there before I already have 18 months in to my retirement. 18.5 year till pension eligibility. Mostly, I love spending more time with the baby.
My aunt died and two of my mom's cousin's died in the same weekend.
My mother admitted she does not remember most of the time she was married to my Father or Step-father, aka my childhood. Now I have no chance of getting context or a linear understand of the things that happened. Oh, and both men had been married before mom and I never knew.
My car sounds like shit and it will probably be a month before I can have anyone look at it.
On Tuesday I took my dog to the vet. In a weird coinscidence a golden retrevier walked up to my back door as I was trying to leave. I put him in the garage with food and water and called the owner. When the owner came he reminded me of a child molester, Normal looking, very rich suburby, but unidentifiably creepy somehow. He mentioned the dog has run away a few times before. As he walked away from the house, the dog stopped and didn't want to go. He hit the dog hard in the middle of the back and violently dragged it away. I don't think the guy knows I saw. If that dog makes it back to me, it is disappearing.
This morning I had to deal with the fact my ex lies to me, tries to teach the baby to lie to me, dresses her in boys underwear and makes he feel ashamed of herself to the point that the nightmares have returned (though, thank g-d not as bad as before). I am continuely grateful for the baby's therapist. She handles the ex very well and I am very proud of myself for the way I dealt with the situation. I do have to admit, the fact he knows the court ordered him to stop this behavior once before does help my cause.
But mostly, I'm dealing with having to put my dog down today. He was wonderful and loving. He knew his job was to take care of the baby and he did it with calm reliability. Even M, who was bravely dealing with her long standing terror of dogs, loved him and would take him on walks alone sometimes. He was in alot of pain and had begun having seizures so I know it was the right thing to do ,but still holding him at the vet today was hard. He was loving and cuddling to the last second. My mom and Rowen were there and that definatly helped. It was oddly comforting to see Rowen cry for Patch. He is a good man and even though he only knew Patch for 6 weeks, he really loved that dog. My cats have spent the day following me around a cuddling with me. That has been very helpful as well.
I'm sorry this post is so poorly written; I don't have the strength for eloquince (or decent spelling).
I'll try to be happier next time.