So I haven't written in eons; hopefully you haven't forgotten me:)
Well well, the seemingly never present in LJ Steph is back, at least for this post; then I may go away again, only reading in the background and not writing. I hope you don't think any less of me. I've been trying to think of something useful to write about; not just how my day was or what I've been up to, though, doubt me not, I'll inevitably bring those topics up because what I've been up to obviously make up much of who I am.
As of a few days ago, I've been with Jeremy, my boyfriend not to mention my best friend, for 8 months. A short time you say? Perhaps in the long run yes; but it feels as if it's only been about 3. I count this time thing not as bad. Nah, in fact, I think it's wonderful! I cannot honestly recalled a time when I've been as happy as I am now. He makes me smile when he appears n my thoughts and my dreams are selfishly kept to myself:) I only get to see him every other weekend which is harder than I thought it would be. I've begun to dread every other Sunday's ending because it means that one of us has let the other for a time. I've never really cried at goodbye's, except when I was a small child leaving my grandparents' house or foolishly when my mom picked my brother and me up from my gene donor's house. Now, I'm lucky if I can hold back my tears when it's leaving time, despite the fact that we will se each other within two weeks time. It still sucks. Yeah, things will not be this way next summer; Jeremy and I have already talked about it and both of us agree that this sucks and cannot continue. That's how things stand in that respect. I love him with all of my heart, and that's all there is to it.
School went well. Met lots of new people. Had lots of fun and experienced new things. Got my first of many piercings as my present from Jeremy last Christmas. Going to get another soon. Probably other side of lip. Probably. Still a biology major with an anthropology minor with hopes of attending Boston Eye and Ear to do optometry and specialize in disease. Those are my hopes, my goals if you will. That's school.
Sometimes I notice myself slipping away from reality, getting distant. And I've been wondering why that is. Perhaps it's the lack of time I spend with my friends or both of my parents just hanging out. I can't remember the last time exactly I saw a few select friends that I miss greatly. I've also been plagued with a bitterness that I'm doing my best to give to God. I'm tired of it and yet every time I think of two people, it comes back like the bile taste when you're sick. That's depressing in itself and when I think of it I get into a violent mood and don't act as myself. I don't like it. It needs to stop. Heh, should I talk to these people about it? Probably not; I fear it'll just be thrown back in my face and left at that. I don't like it one bit, but pray for me, even if you don't pray, to shirk this bitterness. "Love your enemies." That's a verse from somewhere in the Bible; I don't know where, but I know that Jesus said it in the gospels. "Love your enemies." So hard and yet so necessary.
Feel loved whoever you are reading this and peace be with you even in the most chaotic times in your life. Peace be with with you. I love you Jeremy! Peace!
As of a few days ago, I've been with Jeremy, my boyfriend not to mention my best friend, for 8 months. A short time you say? Perhaps in the long run yes; but it feels as if it's only been about 3. I count this time thing not as bad. Nah, in fact, I think it's wonderful! I cannot honestly recalled a time when I've been as happy as I am now. He makes me smile when he appears n my thoughts and my dreams are selfishly kept to myself:) I only get to see him every other weekend which is harder than I thought it would be. I've begun to dread every other Sunday's ending because it means that one of us has let the other for a time. I've never really cried at goodbye's, except when I was a small child leaving my grandparents' house or foolishly when my mom picked my brother and me up from my gene donor's house. Now, I'm lucky if I can hold back my tears when it's leaving time, despite the fact that we will se each other within two weeks time. It still sucks. Yeah, things will not be this way next summer; Jeremy and I have already talked about it and both of us agree that this sucks and cannot continue. That's how things stand in that respect. I love him with all of my heart, and that's all there is to it.
School went well. Met lots of new people. Had lots of fun and experienced new things. Got my first of many piercings as my present from Jeremy last Christmas. Going to get another soon. Probably other side of lip. Probably. Still a biology major with an anthropology minor with hopes of attending Boston Eye and Ear to do optometry and specialize in disease. Those are my hopes, my goals if you will. That's school.
Sometimes I notice myself slipping away from reality, getting distant. And I've been wondering why that is. Perhaps it's the lack of time I spend with my friends or both of my parents just hanging out. I can't remember the last time exactly I saw a few select friends that I miss greatly. I've also been plagued with a bitterness that I'm doing my best to give to God. I'm tired of it and yet every time I think of two people, it comes back like the bile taste when you're sick. That's depressing in itself and when I think of it I get into a violent mood and don't act as myself. I don't like it. It needs to stop. Heh, should I talk to these people about it? Probably not; I fear it'll just be thrown back in my face and left at that. I don't like it one bit, but pray for me, even if you don't pray, to shirk this bitterness. "Love your enemies." That's a verse from somewhere in the Bible; I don't know where, but I know that Jesus said it in the gospels. "Love your enemies." So hard and yet so necessary.
Feel loved whoever you are reading this and peace be with you even in the most chaotic times in your life. Peace be with with you. I love you Jeremy! Peace!