20 Facts
Good god, let's see if I can even come up with 20. (I'm assuming they should be vaguely interesting, rather than 'I have blue eyes.')
1. I'm a dog person. I have two dogs right now - Luna (basset/terrier mutt), who is 13.5 and Foxy (corgi/sheltie mutt) who is 3. Tom convinced me to move out of our apartment overlooking Golden Gate Park into a crap neighborhood but a house we could own by staying I could have dogs. While they aren't my kids, they are an important part of my life.
2. I'm a reader. I inhale books (which sometimes means I don't remember them too clearly) and have filled up several bookshelves and need more. I could probably fill a whole room of shelves with books I own. I have read every genre, fiction and non. I tend to follow my passion of the moment, which is good when I'm at the library and less good when I actually purchase the books.
3. I both love and hate my body. I guess that's pretty common for women, but I've hated my body for most of my life (even when I used to weigh about 80 lbs less than I do now). It's only since getting pregnant and having kids that I've really come to appreciate what it can do. It grew two beings and fed them for years. I'd like to treat it better, but most of the time I don't. I eat crap, drink too much and exercise way too little. A work in progress, I guess.
4. I'm a fangirl. I love to get really into something, write fanfic, the whole bit. Lord of the Rings is my main fandom, but I dabble in other stuff. I even went to a LotR convention, back in 2003. Which was 10 years ago and that freaks me right out. I miss my fellow fangirls.
5. I would never again live away from the ocean. I am only a few miles away from the Pacific and I love it. There is something about looking out over the ocean that soothes me.
6. I'm a Pisces, and I'm pretty much exactly like that.
7. If I could, I would spend the rest of my life in college. I love studying, reading, learning. Nothing would make me happier than reading, discussing, listening to lectures and writing papers forever.
8. I love sleep. I have a love affair with my bed. I daydream about pillows and blankets and long naps. Maybe this is because of having kidlets who wake me up in the night, but probably not. I count myself very lucky that I've avoided my brother's issues with insomnia.
9. I'm queer. This is something I've been struggling with lately, trying to figure out who I am. I've been out as bisexual for a good 18 years or so... but I'm also realizing that I was still forming my sexual identity when I started dating Tom. I'm not sure where I fall on the Kinsey scale anymore.
10. I'm a writer. I finally finished the first draft of a novel I've been working on for years. (Like, an embarrassing number of years.) I have confidence that the second draft will take much less time, and I hope to see my book actually in print one of these days. But even if I never 'traditionally' publish, I'm sure I'll put stuff online, and even if I couldn't do that I would still write. Writing is one way I make sense of the world.
11. I'm still trying to figure out who I want to be when I grow up. The two careers that have called to me most (besides 'author') are midwife and grief counselor. There's something about the liminal edges of life that beckons. Maybe it's the cutting through of bullshit.
12. I'm an introvert. I've been pretty clear about that all of my life. I've struggled with shyness and social anxiety ever since I can remember (and before I can remember, too. My separation anxiety as a kid was legendary). Even though I am becoming more confident, I still need to retreat sometimes to recharge before going out into the world again. I'm learning to be okay with that.
13. My connections with other people keep me sane. It's funny, a strange flip-side to my introversion - if I spend too long with just my own brain for company, it gets me into trouble. I know all about the 'stinking thinking'.
14. One of my greatest talents is anticipatory anxiety. And by 'greatest' I mean biggest. Not most awesome. It sucks. But I'm learning to deal with that, too.
15. My second greatest talent is the ability to hide how I'm feeling. I've surprised my couple's counselor with this a few times. I'm a little proud of this fact. But I also realize this distances me from other people, and I'm trying to be more open with my messiness.
16. My favorite color is purple. I have purple glasses. My first car was a purple Chevy Cavalier. I had purple Birkenstocks for years. I dyed my hair purple for a bit, but was too lazy to keep it up. (Other favorite colors include blue and green. I am totally a water person.)
17. If I didn't live in San Francisco (and I can barely imagine leaving, after only 14 years here), I would live in Hawaii. The slowness, the water, the weather, my idea of heaven.
18. I sometimes believe I was born in the wrong year. I feel like a displaced hippie.
19. I wish I could re-do my college years and take advantage of the exploration possibilities. I am so sad that I boxed myself in so tightly with fear. I wish I had gone abroad, taken classes at Mt. Holyoke and Smith (while I was at UMass), made more friends, dated women...
20. Of all the things in my life, I love being a mother the most. I went through probably 20 years where I was adamant about not wanting kids. Part of that was from my anxiety, and part of it was not wanting to pass on the depression and anxiety. I am so glad I didn't let it stop me, because (for me) there is *nothing* that compares to being a mother. I am desperately in love with Tai and Miriam, and if I had more energy, I would have at least one more kid. I loved being pregnant and giving birth and having a newborn and watching that tiny being become a person. I am so fascinated by it every day. (Even when I am also tearing my hair out and both kids are screaming.)
1. I'm a dog person. I have two dogs right now - Luna (basset/terrier mutt), who is 13.5 and Foxy (corgi/sheltie mutt) who is 3. Tom convinced me to move out of our apartment overlooking Golden Gate Park into a crap neighborhood but a house we could own by staying I could have dogs. While they aren't my kids, they are an important part of my life.
2. I'm a reader. I inhale books (which sometimes means I don't remember them too clearly) and have filled up several bookshelves and need more. I could probably fill a whole room of shelves with books I own. I have read every genre, fiction and non. I tend to follow my passion of the moment, which is good when I'm at the library and less good when I actually purchase the books.
3. I both love and hate my body. I guess that's pretty common for women, but I've hated my body for most of my life (even when I used to weigh about 80 lbs less than I do now). It's only since getting pregnant and having kids that I've really come to appreciate what it can do. It grew two beings and fed them for years. I'd like to treat it better, but most of the time I don't. I eat crap, drink too much and exercise way too little. A work in progress, I guess.
4. I'm a fangirl. I love to get really into something, write fanfic, the whole bit. Lord of the Rings is my main fandom, but I dabble in other stuff. I even went to a LotR convention, back in 2003. Which was 10 years ago and that freaks me right out. I miss my fellow fangirls.
5. I would never again live away from the ocean. I am only a few miles away from the Pacific and I love it. There is something about looking out over the ocean that soothes me.
6. I'm a Pisces, and I'm pretty much exactly like that.
7. If I could, I would spend the rest of my life in college. I love studying, reading, learning. Nothing would make me happier than reading, discussing, listening to lectures and writing papers forever.
8. I love sleep. I have a love affair with my bed. I daydream about pillows and blankets and long naps. Maybe this is because of having kidlets who wake me up in the night, but probably not. I count myself very lucky that I've avoided my brother's issues with insomnia.
9. I'm queer. This is something I've been struggling with lately, trying to figure out who I am. I've been out as bisexual for a good 18 years or so... but I'm also realizing that I was still forming my sexual identity when I started dating Tom. I'm not sure where I fall on the Kinsey scale anymore.
10. I'm a writer. I finally finished the first draft of a novel I've been working on for years. (Like, an embarrassing number of years.) I have confidence that the second draft will take much less time, and I hope to see my book actually in print one of these days. But even if I never 'traditionally' publish, I'm sure I'll put stuff online, and even if I couldn't do that I would still write. Writing is one way I make sense of the world.
11. I'm still trying to figure out who I want to be when I grow up. The two careers that have called to me most (besides 'author') are midwife and grief counselor. There's something about the liminal edges of life that beckons. Maybe it's the cutting through of bullshit.
12. I'm an introvert. I've been pretty clear about that all of my life. I've struggled with shyness and social anxiety ever since I can remember (and before I can remember, too. My separation anxiety as a kid was legendary). Even though I am becoming more confident, I still need to retreat sometimes to recharge before going out into the world again. I'm learning to be okay with that.
13. My connections with other people keep me sane. It's funny, a strange flip-side to my introversion - if I spend too long with just my own brain for company, it gets me into trouble. I know all about the 'stinking thinking'.
14. One of my greatest talents is anticipatory anxiety. And by 'greatest' I mean biggest. Not most awesome. It sucks. But I'm learning to deal with that, too.
15. My second greatest talent is the ability to hide how I'm feeling. I've surprised my couple's counselor with this a few times. I'm a little proud of this fact. But I also realize this distances me from other people, and I'm trying to be more open with my messiness.
16. My favorite color is purple. I have purple glasses. My first car was a purple Chevy Cavalier. I had purple Birkenstocks for years. I dyed my hair purple for a bit, but was too lazy to keep it up. (Other favorite colors include blue and green. I am totally a water person.)
17. If I didn't live in San Francisco (and I can barely imagine leaving, after only 14 years here), I would live in Hawaii. The slowness, the water, the weather, my idea of heaven.
18. I sometimes believe I was born in the wrong year. I feel like a displaced hippie.
19. I wish I could re-do my college years and take advantage of the exploration possibilities. I am so sad that I boxed myself in so tightly with fear. I wish I had gone abroad, taken classes at Mt. Holyoke and Smith (while I was at UMass), made more friends, dated women...
20. Of all the things in my life, I love being a mother the most. I went through probably 20 years where I was adamant about not wanting kids. Part of that was from my anxiety, and part of it was not wanting to pass on the depression and anxiety. I am so glad I didn't let it stop me, because (for me) there is *nothing* that compares to being a mother. I am desperately in love with Tai and Miriam, and if I had more energy, I would have at least one more kid. I loved being pregnant and giving birth and having a newborn and watching that tiny being become a person. I am so fascinated by it every day. (Even when I am also tearing my hair out and both kids are screaming.)