Hi Journal
I have grown more hair since I last sat a wrote here. I have also been clashing with the world a little bit more effectively too. I have reached some sort or zenith in my life. I am not soaring high. My feet are still on the ground, yet I have good vision. I cannot explain it, but I know things are going to be ok. I do not live in fear of the other foot falling. I will act appropriately if it does.
I have reached a view point that allows me to see quite a bit. From my perch, I can approach professionals, and know that they are encountering one as well. I can see Jen, know her more clearly with understanding, and know what this love between us is. I am not worried about my friends I have them and that is enough for me. I can see some places where I am blind too. I do not need to pretend to see in those places either. I can acknowledge the weakness and learn to compensate for it. I can look at politics and feel bothered a little bit more descriptively. I can see what is going on with our economy and disagree with the actions being taken. Hell, I am young I can disagree for a while longer.
From here I can see things that upset me too. These things like racism, sexism, ignorance, social abuse, and deception tug on me when ever I walk out the door. It terrifies even more when I see them in myself. Three times in the last month I have had some black person call me honky or some slur as I am walking home from the gym. I have heard people talk about Hilary, and how she needs to be president because she is a woman. I have heard neighbors and myself quietly tell each other that whatever happened was not the fault of any of us. But who is doing this? Where do these things come from?
These things have bothered me for a long long time. In fact upsetting does not frame it correctly. Words like appalling, enraging, and demoralizing could as easily take upsetting's place, but sensationalism is a contributor to the scenario out there. I am going to be as guiltless as possible in adding to the mindless escapade of hypersensitive social issues.
The things I have seen have caused an inexcusable mar in my view point. Why do people look at me in hate when I have never met them? Why do some women think so little of men? Though I lack the scholarship necessary for the having an answer, if I had to guess I would point to the masses readily trading in their guilt for hobbled redemption. Should men feel guilty at a "woman's plight"? How long does someone have before it is time to stand up and walk? Does all this plight really exist save in the countless recounting in the shadow of our own imagination, and in the pieces of propaganda claiming equality can only be had by a reversal of the same ignorant practices? Again, if I had to guess I am sure I would pursue the answer down one of these avenues.
These are probably issues best left to gentler hands, but I am looking at books titled "Stupid White Men", hearing women go gozanga over a women candidate because she is a woman, or seeing people grow cynical when made to speak and act in the light of conflicting evidence. There is a long way to go before a collective realization can explain what eliminating prejudice means. The realization comes in a pill that is hard to swallow. It takes a refusal to believe in a predetermined future. It takes a denial of the guilt that signs the blank check written on an otherwise well minded social conscious. It takes an ownership of the elephant that is not just in the room, but sitting on everyone's lap.
Somethings are just ripe for the picking.
HiL out
I have reached a view point that allows me to see quite a bit. From my perch, I can approach professionals, and know that they are encountering one as well. I can see Jen, know her more clearly with understanding, and know what this love between us is. I am not worried about my friends I have them and that is enough for me. I can see some places where I am blind too. I do not need to pretend to see in those places either. I can acknowledge the weakness and learn to compensate for it. I can look at politics and feel bothered a little bit more descriptively. I can see what is going on with our economy and disagree with the actions being taken. Hell, I am young I can disagree for a while longer.
From here I can see things that upset me too. These things like racism, sexism, ignorance, social abuse, and deception tug on me when ever I walk out the door. It terrifies even more when I see them in myself. Three times in the last month I have had some black person call me honky or some slur as I am walking home from the gym. I have heard people talk about Hilary, and how she needs to be president because she is a woman. I have heard neighbors and myself quietly tell each other that whatever happened was not the fault of any of us. But who is doing this? Where do these things come from?
These things have bothered me for a long long time. In fact upsetting does not frame it correctly. Words like appalling, enraging, and demoralizing could as easily take upsetting's place, but sensationalism is a contributor to the scenario out there. I am going to be as guiltless as possible in adding to the mindless escapade of hypersensitive social issues.
The things I have seen have caused an inexcusable mar in my view point. Why do people look at me in hate when I have never met them? Why do some women think so little of men? Though I lack the scholarship necessary for the having an answer, if I had to guess I would point to the masses readily trading in their guilt for hobbled redemption. Should men feel guilty at a "woman's plight"? How long does someone have before it is time to stand up and walk? Does all this plight really exist save in the countless recounting in the shadow of our own imagination, and in the pieces of propaganda claiming equality can only be had by a reversal of the same ignorant practices? Again, if I had to guess I am sure I would pursue the answer down one of these avenues.
These are probably issues best left to gentler hands, but I am looking at books titled "Stupid White Men", hearing women go gozanga over a women candidate because she is a woman, or seeing people grow cynical when made to speak and act in the light of conflicting evidence. There is a long way to go before a collective realization can explain what eliminating prejudice means. The realization comes in a pill that is hard to swallow. It takes a refusal to believe in a predetermined future. It takes a denial of the guilt that signs the blank check written on an otherwise well minded social conscious. It takes an ownership of the elephant that is not just in the room, but sitting on everyone's lap.
Somethings are just ripe for the picking.
HiL out