Been a long time

May 03, 2007 18:06

I thought I'd share my favorite Recruiting stories thus far:

I've been a Recruiter for Enterprise for a few months now and I have to say it is RICH fodder for short stories (especially my Part Time hires):

Today the HR Manager at work got a phone call. It went a little something like this:

"This is **** How may I help you?"
"This is *** *** from Branch ## and I'm having a problem..."
"Ok, what is it?"
"Well the thing is, my Parole Officer told me that everytime I cross the DC line I'm breaking the law!!"
"Uh huh..."
"Yeah, so what should we do?"
"Well...um....why do you have a Parole Officer"
"That is something I don't wish to disclose at this time"
"Yeah...I'm gonna need to know what happened. Are we talking felony here or misdemeanor?"
" **chuckle** I'd rather not disclose"

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Dear Ms. Tiff,

I woul dlike to thenk you for tha oportunite to interview with Enterprize. I got you letter sayin that you didnt' think you wer going to hire me. I was just wundering why that Was?

Thank YOU.

Mr. JOnes

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Last Question on the Job Application:

Have you ever been charged with a Felony?

YES

If "yes" please explain.

It was all a big misunderstanding. My Wife left her handgun in my car.

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*spanishspanishspanishspanishspanishspanishspanish*
"No hablo espanol"
*spanishspanishspanish*
"Yeah. I still don't speak Spanish"
*spanishspanish*
"Nothin'...."
*spanish*
Ok, bye.
BITCH.
"Now that one I got!"

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"Hey Brian. You were supposed to start work yesterday. What happened?"
"Yeah. I just didn't feel like it. Plus I couldn't remember where you said I was supposed to go."
"Oh. I see. Well unfortunately we're not going to be able to keep you on. We really needed you to show up yesterday."
"Yeah. I mean, maybe I could do tomorrow or something."
"No, that won't be necessary. We're letting you go."
"Aight, nice. When do we get paid?"

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**6th voicemail in two hours**

"Miss Shaw, I know I'm buggin' you but I really need 'dis job. I got 5 kids and beels to pay. Please call me back. You a'int avoidin' me is you?"

noooooooo of course not creepy stalker person...not at all....

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