Interlude
I apologize for the lack of responses I am not making - I appreciate your comments, I really do - but things got a tad busy, and I haven't even unloaded the pictures from the camera yet!
Even this little update is only to observe that SyFy has such badly acted movies (I love 'em) that I think I missed a career in z-grade acting. I know I can deliver a line with at least as much lack of conviction as those guys.
I wanted to be an actor at one point - a pretty normal thing, I suppose. I was passable at it - I got some major roles in some plays, at school and at the acting school I went to, and I was told that I could probably get in to RADA (Royal Academy of Dramatic Arts) no problem, as soon as I got a bachelor's degree (it's a secondary degree school, for the most part), and blah, blah, blah, so on and so forth. I've acted at the National Theater in DC, and I've been on public access cable.
(I should get a reality show, don't you think?)*
Even then, I was just unusual-looking enough that I could get sidekick roles and goofy parts (like Martha Plimpton, who is awesome), and if I'd lost weight, I could have gotten more, but the thing that stopped me was the constant rejection that actors go through - even the really good ones, of which I probably wasn't (didn't stick to it long enough to find out). I'm a sensitive soul, and I wasn't good at creating the necessary hard shell that actors need to build to survive the rat race.
Directors and casting agents are cruel - Simon on American Idol is a paragon of gentleness and consideration compared to some I ran into, even as a teen actor. I've been insulted, trashed, asked why I even bothered to come, told I sucked, told I looked horrible, and all in the calmest, most matter-of-fact way. Casting people don't have time to be nice - there's another 400 of you they need to see today, and you'll be forgotten as soon as you walk out. What's devastating to the auditioner is barely a blip in the director's day.
And behaving badly? Might get you a moment on TV during the AI auditions, but it gets you blacklisted from real auditions. You don't get to be a diva until you're commanding millions of dollars in revenue. The average spoiled brat on AI would get their name passed around all the casting people, and they wouldn't even be allowed to audition. The Chorus and the back row don't get to throw a temper tantrum, ever.
I knew that was a life I didn't have the temperament to hack. But man, if SyFy movies are anything to go by, I certainly had the talent. Never mind - it's not like I regret choosing a diferent path.
*My Crazy Mized-Up Life, showing hours of me planted on my butt in font of the TV, interspersed with occasional footage of me panicking at the thought of calling for pizza. Cable Access TV? I'm baaaaaaaaaack.