Worlds away
So my inner traveller took a hit today.
I had a discussion with Tom Heller, one of the leading figures in the international climate change negotiation world, and an expert in many ways in his field. He is a professor at SLS, and represents much that I admire in the environmental world; dispassion, honestly, frankness, and creativity. Which is why it was so poainful to me to hear this world-famous negotiator deride the utility of international negotiations, and emphasize more critical, economic, technical analysis as the path to the future.
I wouldn't say that I disagree with him. It would be hard to examine the world of climate change today without feeling at least some sense of cynicism, especially in China, India, Brazil, and the host of up-and-coming countries who seem to be mouthing off what htey need to mouth and doing exactly what they need to, earth be damned, to maximise their growth. Not that I blame those countries, but it's pretty hard to miss.
The sad part about this story, is that the United Nations Environmental Program seems to be an ever-receding dream of mine. To be honest, I chose it mostly becuase of its location in Nairobi, Kenya - a place that I have always wanted to go, and would like to go before I get too settled in. But from what he said, I would essentially be wasting my time there, and if I want ot actually do good work, the place to go would be some sort of climate-oriented business or organization ideally in the DC area.
Meanwhile, I have a friend, Melissa, who is currently living what sounds like almost hte ideal life in Europe. She is out there with her boyfriend, wandering around, settling down as desired, soaking in the cultures and mores of foreign lands with nary a care in the world. Her writing is admittedly incredible, which always romanticizes any experience, but I still can't help but imagine myself thriving in the world she paints, as much as my mind tells me I would languish.
I guess it all comes down to choices, and for me it feels a lot like I get to either change the world, or experience the world. The more I do of one, the less I will do of the other. It's a difficult decision, really, especially given my personality. On the one hand, I could work my entire life and actually have some positive effect on the world, but then miss out on what is after all my one chance to exeperience it. Or, I could give in to my perpetual wanderlust and see every exotic nook and cranny the world has to offer - and throw away all the tools I have been blessed with to actually matter; essentially, to live, to see, to open my mind, and then to wither, with few the better for my existence.
I mean, I'm sure that I'm going to see lots of places the world has to offer - but by putting myself on this path towards success, I am dooming myself to a snapshot, rather than a painting, of every foreign land I visit.
I think I'm going to go to Nairobi if I get the job, consequences be damned. This is one of my last chances to really live and experience an area of the world that I have been fascinated wiht since I was 10. It's an important life experience, and I feel like at hte end of the day, I need to be happy with what I do and who I am, and I have hte rest of my life to be important. It is just painful to know that no matter what I do, I throw away a different opportunity.
I had a discussion with Tom Heller, one of the leading figures in the international climate change negotiation world, and an expert in many ways in his field. He is a professor at SLS, and represents much that I admire in the environmental world; dispassion, honestly, frankness, and creativity. Which is why it was so poainful to me to hear this world-famous negotiator deride the utility of international negotiations, and emphasize more critical, economic, technical analysis as the path to the future.
I wouldn't say that I disagree with him. It would be hard to examine the world of climate change today without feeling at least some sense of cynicism, especially in China, India, Brazil, and the host of up-and-coming countries who seem to be mouthing off what htey need to mouth and doing exactly what they need to, earth be damned, to maximise their growth. Not that I blame those countries, but it's pretty hard to miss.
The sad part about this story, is that the United Nations Environmental Program seems to be an ever-receding dream of mine. To be honest, I chose it mostly becuase of its location in Nairobi, Kenya - a place that I have always wanted to go, and would like to go before I get too settled in. But from what he said, I would essentially be wasting my time there, and if I want ot actually do good work, the place to go would be some sort of climate-oriented business or organization ideally in the DC area.
Meanwhile, I have a friend, Melissa, who is currently living what sounds like almost hte ideal life in Europe. She is out there with her boyfriend, wandering around, settling down as desired, soaking in the cultures and mores of foreign lands with nary a care in the world. Her writing is admittedly incredible, which always romanticizes any experience, but I still can't help but imagine myself thriving in the world she paints, as much as my mind tells me I would languish.
I guess it all comes down to choices, and for me it feels a lot like I get to either change the world, or experience the world. The more I do of one, the less I will do of the other. It's a difficult decision, really, especially given my personality. On the one hand, I could work my entire life and actually have some positive effect on the world, but then miss out on what is after all my one chance to exeperience it. Or, I could give in to my perpetual wanderlust and see every exotic nook and cranny the world has to offer - and throw away all the tools I have been blessed with to actually matter; essentially, to live, to see, to open my mind, and then to wither, with few the better for my existence.
I mean, I'm sure that I'm going to see lots of places the world has to offer - but by putting myself on this path towards success, I am dooming myself to a snapshot, rather than a painting, of every foreign land I visit.
I think I'm going to go to Nairobi if I get the job, consequences be damned. This is one of my last chances to really live and experience an area of the world that I have been fascinated wiht since I was 10. It's an important life experience, and I feel like at hte end of the day, I need to be happy with what I do and who I am, and I have hte rest of my life to be important. It is just painful to know that no matter what I do, I throw away a different opportunity.