New Years
My cousin Hillary is back from Kansas this week, end I took my brother up to Delhi, NY (about 2 hours into nowhere) to visit her this weekend. We were the cousin equivalent of best friends growing up, and share a lot of common interests even today. She was having a gathering with lots of her artsy friends, and I spent part of the weekend playing various board games, Rock Band, drinking and talking nearly til dawn.
I've been in a pretty bad rut for weeks now, and this one of the only times I've been almost normal and happy for about 24 hours straight. It was pretty good, and it's the first part of an initiative I've realized I need to do.
You would think recent girl disasters would be the cause of my depression, and you wouldn't be off the mark. However, that's not the only cause of this problem, which has been waxing and waning since I moved to Poughkeepsie. Especially since the spring, I've lost a lot of ground I had made on exercising, getting out of the house more, and seeing friends often.
First of all, I have a lot of friends. Like, a crazy amount. Yes, they've scattered the country a bit, but I have quite a few in driving distance. Even Andrew, the guy I spent a year and a half making video games with, lives a mere 10 minutes from me, and we're both such procrastinators, that we barely hang out. I've decided to go back to my old rule: I must visit friends 3 times a week. That forces me to get my ass out of the house, or at least pick up the phone and be assertive about actually inviting people here (Which I can count on my hands the number of times that has happened).
Exercise is another big thing: Last year I was running, doing Crossfit (a great gym), and Thai Chi. Over the summer both my gym and Thai Chi class have disbanded, and because of the places I chose to run in Poughkeepsie, my knee starting giving out, which caused me to stop running. For starters, I either have to get a gym membership, or I need to find alternate ways of exercising. The big hold up is how much I love pull-ups, and my lack of access to a place to do them.
Because of the lack of exercise, I've physically not felt nearly as well, I've had less energy, and that's led to more laziness and depression, something that isn't who I have been at my prime. While I was seeing Bea, I felt a lot better about myself, but I still wasn't at the peak I was even a year ago. I used to be passionate and excited about almost everything in life. I was good at getting others excited about things, and finding the good in almost anything. I used to try new recipes nearly every week, photograph my food, explore nature often, and so many other things.
I think exercise and friends are the key to returning to this person. I guess that's my New years resolution. It's nothing I haven't done before, but more building a latter to climb out of this rut. It's been getting dug out over the last two years, but I think it's possible.
I've been in a pretty bad rut for weeks now, and this one of the only times I've been almost normal and happy for about 24 hours straight. It was pretty good, and it's the first part of an initiative I've realized I need to do.
You would think recent girl disasters would be the cause of my depression, and you wouldn't be off the mark. However, that's not the only cause of this problem, which has been waxing and waning since I moved to Poughkeepsie. Especially since the spring, I've lost a lot of ground I had made on exercising, getting out of the house more, and seeing friends often.
First of all, I have a lot of friends. Like, a crazy amount. Yes, they've scattered the country a bit, but I have quite a few in driving distance. Even Andrew, the guy I spent a year and a half making video games with, lives a mere 10 minutes from me, and we're both such procrastinators, that we barely hang out. I've decided to go back to my old rule: I must visit friends 3 times a week. That forces me to get my ass out of the house, or at least pick up the phone and be assertive about actually inviting people here (Which I can count on my hands the number of times that has happened).
Exercise is another big thing: Last year I was running, doing Crossfit (a great gym), and Thai Chi. Over the summer both my gym and Thai Chi class have disbanded, and because of the places I chose to run in Poughkeepsie, my knee starting giving out, which caused me to stop running. For starters, I either have to get a gym membership, or I need to find alternate ways of exercising. The big hold up is how much I love pull-ups, and my lack of access to a place to do them.
Because of the lack of exercise, I've physically not felt nearly as well, I've had less energy, and that's led to more laziness and depression, something that isn't who I have been at my prime. While I was seeing Bea, I felt a lot better about myself, but I still wasn't at the peak I was even a year ago. I used to be passionate and excited about almost everything in life. I was good at getting others excited about things, and finding the good in almost anything. I used to try new recipes nearly every week, photograph my food, explore nature often, and so many other things.
I think exercise and friends are the key to returning to this person. I guess that's my New years resolution. It's nothing I haven't done before, but more building a latter to climb out of this rut. It's been getting dug out over the last two years, but I think it's possible.