Oh, the pearls of wisdom
From my boyfriend of 6 yrs:
As I am about to tuck into 1/3 of a cup of carefully weighed Haagen-Daas caramel vanilla latte ice cream- he has watched me put it on the scale.
"You're not exercising right now so you had better watch how much fat you eat"
As he eats a ginormous cinnamon bun. He has more body fat than I do.
"Girls with anorexia just want to look like models or something so that guys will like them. But they totally overdo it."
Then I explain that sometimes women with anorexia are trying to disappear, or trying to be thin to escape the attention of men, etc. He thinks that is totally weird. Of course every single person with an eating disorder has the exact same motivations and behaviours!
On the plus side, he obviously has no idea about my super-secret-double-life. Fuck, I am so good at hiding this.
I sometimes just want to lose a bunch of weight so that he doesn't want me anymore and I can get out of here. This town is depressing, there is no opportunity here. I do not like working for him. I feel like it is a slap in the face of every woman who ever fought for my rights to go to school and work and travel by myself and be who I want to be. I have finished a double major/honours degree and now I am working as my boyfriend's secretary.
On the plus side, I think this job might look really good on my med school app- "Started a business from scratch and built it to $500,000 gross yearly sales within 5 yrs of business"
Every single thing I do, all day long, is to please him. I am my own last priority. Last night, instead of studying like I had planned, I cleaned the bathroom and vacuumed. I need to study because I need to continue to get good grades so I can be accepted.
As I am about to tuck into 1/3 of a cup of carefully weighed Haagen-Daas caramel vanilla latte ice cream- he has watched me put it on the scale.
"You're not exercising right now so you had better watch how much fat you eat"
As he eats a ginormous cinnamon bun. He has more body fat than I do.
"Girls with anorexia just want to look like models or something so that guys will like them. But they totally overdo it."
Then I explain that sometimes women with anorexia are trying to disappear, or trying to be thin to escape the attention of men, etc. He thinks that is totally weird. Of course every single person with an eating disorder has the exact same motivations and behaviours!
On the plus side, he obviously has no idea about my super-secret-double-life. Fuck, I am so good at hiding this.
I sometimes just want to lose a bunch of weight so that he doesn't want me anymore and I can get out of here. This town is depressing, there is no opportunity here. I do not like working for him. I feel like it is a slap in the face of every woman who ever fought for my rights to go to school and work and travel by myself and be who I want to be. I have finished a double major/honours degree and now I am working as my boyfriend's secretary.
On the plus side, I think this job might look really good on my med school app- "Started a business from scratch and built it to $500,000 gross yearly sales within 5 yrs of business"
Every single thing I do, all day long, is to please him. I am my own last priority. Last night, instead of studying like I had planned, I cleaned the bathroom and vacuumed. I need to study because I need to continue to get good grades so I can be accepted.