deathathon ficlet from the betafish
Superstitious Nonsense by the betafish for death-a-thon
Assignment Riley death by umbrella - comedy. Please review its betafish's first ficlet!
"You know, I'm usually supportive about these little forays into the metaphysical..." Riley sounded less than convincing to the others in the room, "but this time I think you're all going overboard."
All the scoobies and Spike had assembled to help with the location spell Willow was attempting to refine. Success would mean an easier way to locate any new demonic incursions into Sunnydale.
"Witchcraft is just superstitious nonsense. Even the most complicated spells can be explained and replicated with a suitable application of good, hard, science."
The redhead winced noticeably and bit her lip. She'd have to ignore this rant if she wanted to complete this particular spell without it fizzling out.
"The only thing hard in here is your head, mate! Now shut up or get out, I'm missing poker night to help Red with this."
"There are just better ways of going about this, is all I'm saying." As usual, Riley was like a dog with a bone. He just wouldn't let go of it.
"If that's all you're saying then we're lucky." Not usually one to agree with the vampire, even Xander was becoming annoyed by Riley's reluctance to let Willow work her magics. He had seen the results of her spells failing before, and it was never good. "Could you please be
quiet until she's finished?"
"Buffy would agree with me if she were here", Riley continued.
"Shhh!!!" Willow was about at the end of her rope, as she glared and hissed at the paramilitary pain in the butt.
"Just give me a few days and I'm sure the Initiative can come up with something that will do the trick. I just hate to see anything so important to your efforts having to rely on the inconsistencies of a bunch of superstitious nonsense."
Willow's lip started to bleed.
"Okay, that's it!" Willow stopped her spell-workings and turned her attention fully toward Riley. "First of all, most superstitions stem from genuine concerns. Second, magic is a real and actual force that everyone here, including you, has witnessed in action. Third, you're
making it impossible for me to do this spell, so sit down and shut up or leave!"
"I'm just saying..." Riley began.
"Shut up!!!", the scoobies cut him off in unison.
"Better take this, it's raining." Spike handed him an umbrella, and motioned toward the door.
"Superstitions, including magic, block mankind from discovering the truth. They serve to keep us ignorant of the real forces at work in our lives and in the world around us. They hinder scientific investigation and discovery by allowing us to be satisfied with the impossible by linking unrelated, coincidental actions together without any logical reason. That's why this 'magic' you're attempting to perform could never work as well as the scientific device I'm trying to help you to get, but for some reason you're all too fixated on this bunk to realize what I'm saying is true." Riley was fully atop his soapbox now.
The color of Willow's face had far surpassed the red of her hair minutes ago.
"There are simply no connections between these tabooed actions and any real effects!"
Before anyone could object to Riley's tirade, the speaker acted.
"Watch, I'll show you!"
The bright shower of sparks brilliantly burned the image of Riley opening the umbrella and thrusting it upward into the light socket of the overhead fixture into the retinas of everyone present.
They all sat briefly in the dark silence that followed before Spike sniffed the air and muttered, "Anyone else hungry for bacon?"
Assignment Riley death by umbrella - comedy. Please review its betafish's first ficlet!
"You know, I'm usually supportive about these little forays into the metaphysical..." Riley sounded less than convincing to the others in the room, "but this time I think you're all going overboard."
All the scoobies and Spike had assembled to help with the location spell Willow was attempting to refine. Success would mean an easier way to locate any new demonic incursions into Sunnydale.
"Witchcraft is just superstitious nonsense. Even the most complicated spells can be explained and replicated with a suitable application of good, hard, science."
The redhead winced noticeably and bit her lip. She'd have to ignore this rant if she wanted to complete this particular spell without it fizzling out.
"The only thing hard in here is your head, mate! Now shut up or get out, I'm missing poker night to help Red with this."
"There are just better ways of going about this, is all I'm saying." As usual, Riley was like a dog with a bone. He just wouldn't let go of it.
"If that's all you're saying then we're lucky." Not usually one to agree with the vampire, even Xander was becoming annoyed by Riley's reluctance to let Willow work her magics. He had seen the results of her spells failing before, and it was never good. "Could you please be
quiet until she's finished?"
"Buffy would agree with me if she were here", Riley continued.
"Shhh!!!" Willow was about at the end of her rope, as she glared and hissed at the paramilitary pain in the butt.
"Just give me a few days and I'm sure the Initiative can come up with something that will do the trick. I just hate to see anything so important to your efforts having to rely on the inconsistencies of a bunch of superstitious nonsense."
Willow's lip started to bleed.
"Okay, that's it!" Willow stopped her spell-workings and turned her attention fully toward Riley. "First of all, most superstitions stem from genuine concerns. Second, magic is a real and actual force that everyone here, including you, has witnessed in action. Third, you're
making it impossible for me to do this spell, so sit down and shut up or leave!"
"I'm just saying..." Riley began.
"Shut up!!!", the scoobies cut him off in unison.
"Better take this, it's raining." Spike handed him an umbrella, and motioned toward the door.
"Superstitions, including magic, block mankind from discovering the truth. They serve to keep us ignorant of the real forces at work in our lives and in the world around us. They hinder scientific investigation and discovery by allowing us to be satisfied with the impossible by linking unrelated, coincidental actions together without any logical reason. That's why this 'magic' you're attempting to perform could never work as well as the scientific device I'm trying to help you to get, but for some reason you're all too fixated on this bunk to realize what I'm saying is true." Riley was fully atop his soapbox now.
The color of Willow's face had far surpassed the red of her hair minutes ago.
"There are simply no connections between these tabooed actions and any real effects!"
Before anyone could object to Riley's tirade, the speaker acted.
"Watch, I'll show you!"
The bright shower of sparks brilliantly burned the image of Riley opening the umbrella and thrusting it upward into the light socket of the overhead fixture into the retinas of everyone present.
They all sat briefly in the dark silence that followed before Spike sniffed the air and muttered, "Anyone else hungry for bacon?"