Rough day.
Today, my autistic son got out of the house. I was frantically searching the entire neighborhood for him for twenty minutes before he was found behind the shed in my backyard. I was on the phone with 911 when my oldest son found him. Many things have been brought to light after this event that have left me slightly defeated, but I am choosing to remain hopeful.
I am re-babyproofing the house. He is too tall for some of the barriers and safety mechanism I had in place--and too smart for some of them as well. I am also considering a GSP tracker to keep on him at all times. His first instinct any time he gets the oppertunity is flight. Right now, it is manageable, and as we learn what his abilities are, we put up new barriers to help keep him safe.
The main realization that has me down today is this: my son is only three, yet it takes me several house-lengths to catch him if he gets his hand free from mine. What happens when he is 12? or 8? What am I going to do when he is too strong for me to overpower him when he wants to get away from me?
I have sent a message to a mom's group about how other moms handle their autistic children with a desire to flee. I have hope that maybe he will respond to therapy. Speech might be beyond him for years, but we might be able to teach him more ASL words. He knows what some of them are when I sign to him, but he doesn't sign back.
My most recent breakthrough in communication with him is promising. I have taught him to take me hand and pull me to what he wants. If it is out of his reach (like most things in my house), he puts his hands up, and I pick him up so he can show me what he wants. It is crude, but it is a huge breakthrough. One of the most difficult tasks in teaching communication to an autistic child is getting them to understand that they have to communicate. When they are little, the parents just do whatever needs to be done for them. We feed them, we bathe them, we love them. But when they get older and their wants lie outside of those necessities, they need to understand that if they want more than food or baths or love, like a specific game or a movie, they have to ask for it, or at the very least tell us what it is they want.
I want to say thank you to all the neighborhood kids and a few of the adults who set out to help me find him this afternoon. They say it takes a village to raise a child. I always thought that was a great concept, but now I know it is a necessity. And when you find yourself in a village willing to help you raise your children, it is a priceless gift. May all your neighbors be as good as mine!
I am re-babyproofing the house. He is too tall for some of the barriers and safety mechanism I had in place--and too smart for some of them as well. I am also considering a GSP tracker to keep on him at all times. His first instinct any time he gets the oppertunity is flight. Right now, it is manageable, and as we learn what his abilities are, we put up new barriers to help keep him safe.
The main realization that has me down today is this: my son is only three, yet it takes me several house-lengths to catch him if he gets his hand free from mine. What happens when he is 12? or 8? What am I going to do when he is too strong for me to overpower him when he wants to get away from me?
I have sent a message to a mom's group about how other moms handle their autistic children with a desire to flee. I have hope that maybe he will respond to therapy. Speech might be beyond him for years, but we might be able to teach him more ASL words. He knows what some of them are when I sign to him, but he doesn't sign back.
My most recent breakthrough in communication with him is promising. I have taught him to take me hand and pull me to what he wants. If it is out of his reach (like most things in my house), he puts his hands up, and I pick him up so he can show me what he wants. It is crude, but it is a huge breakthrough. One of the most difficult tasks in teaching communication to an autistic child is getting them to understand that they have to communicate. When they are little, the parents just do whatever needs to be done for them. We feed them, we bathe them, we love them. But when they get older and their wants lie outside of those necessities, they need to understand that if they want more than food or baths or love, like a specific game or a movie, they have to ask for it, or at the very least tell us what it is they want.
I want to say thank you to all the neighborhood kids and a few of the adults who set out to help me find him this afternoon. They say it takes a village to raise a child. I always thought that was a great concept, but now I know it is a necessity. And when you find yourself in a village willing to help you raise your children, it is a priceless gift. May all your neighbors be as good as mine!