Pairing: Helena G Wells/Claudia Donovan
Rating: PG, fluffy crack fic
Spoiler: Season 2 of Warehouse 13
Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to any of the lovely Warehouse 13 ladies. If I did, they would have a lot more fun - trust me!
Summary: HG, wanting to get to know Claudia better agrees to going out to lunch. Claudia, seeing an opportunity to introduce HG to something new takes our time traveler to the golden arches establishment.
Side note: complete crack fic. No story line implied at all :)
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HG picked up the little golden nugget and turned it over. She sniffed it and then put it down again.
“Are you sure this is food?” she mumbled.
Claudia laughed and nodded. She picked up another chicken nugget and dunked it in the sauce.
“It’s chicken. You dunk it in the sauce and pop it in your mouth. Meal on the go,” she said happily.
“This is not chicken,” Helena protested. “It doesn’t look anything like chicken. It doesn’t even smell like chicken.”
Claudia sighed and rolled her eyes. She pushed the fries closer to Helena.
“Try these.”
“What’s this? Fish?” Helena muttered.
“Potatoes or more specifically French Fries.”
“If the French did this to potatoes they are crazier than I ever thought possible,” Helena mumbled and picked up a crisp fry. She bit off about half an inch and chewed it slowly. Her eyebrows shot up and she stared, surprised, at Claudia. “They are actually not bad. Terribly fattening I’m sure, but quite tasty.”
“French Fries 1, Chicken Nuggets 0,” Claudia tallied up. “What about this?”
“What is it?” Helena asked and warily eyed the container.
“It’s a milkshake. Chocolate flavored.”
“A milk shake?” Helena said confused. “Why would you ever want to shake milk? It would eventually turn to butter.”
Claudia laughed and shook her head. “No it won’t. Milk is pasteurized now. It doesn’t have any cream and stuff in it.”
“No cream? Then what’s the point?” Helena exclaimed and stared at her. “So that’s why the milk has tasted so odd.”
Claudia nodded. “Try it,” she said and pushed the drink closer to Helena. “You might like it.”
“Why is there a cover?” Helena asked confused. She sighed. “This is all so odd. Not even I could’ve come up with this.”
Claudia grabbed the drink and sipped it before handing it back to Helena. “See? You use the straw.”
“Oh, so that’s what it’s for,” Helena said and chuckled. She wrapped her lips around the straw and sucked. Nothing happened. She raised an eyebrow at Claudia.
“You need to suck harder,” Claudia instructed.
Helena winked at her. Claudia blushed furiously. She watched Helena’s cheeks hollow as she sucked hard on the straw. She laughed out loud at the look on Helena’s face when she tasted the ice cream.
“Claudia, this is delicious,” she gasped. She tasted it again and smiled. “I like it.”
“Great, now hand it over,” Claudia said and made an impatient hand gesture.
Helena leaned back and held the milkshake out of Claudia’s reach. “This one’s mine. Get your own,” she said and made a face at Claudia.
“Hey!” Claudia protested.
“I’m not eating any of those chickens, so you can have all of them, but I’m keeping this.”
Claudia rolled her eyes and got up. “Why me?” she mumbled.
“Hey,” Helena exclaimed. “Show some respect, young lady.”
Claudia made a face at her and headed for the counter to get another shake.
THE END
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