[FANFIC] That's The Truth - Daiki Kaito X Tsukasa Kadoya

[athasshirabu]

Title : That’s the truth
Author : athasshirabu 
Pairing : Daiki Kaito X Tsukasa Kadoya
Rating : PG
Genre: failed angst
Warning : Daiki and Tsukasa came from the same world and then lived in Blade’s world, so it’s kind of AU, I think XD Unbeta’d.
A/N : birthday fic for Maa-kun and yes, title taken from McFly’s song *runs*. It’s a super sappy fic but please bear it *hides*. HAPPY 22ND BIRTHDAY MASAHIRO INOUE! \(^_^)/



“I feel like I’ve been put on trial with you…”

Kaito sat on his bed, sweating a little. He glanced at the nightstand, looking at the clock on it. 3 AM. Kaito just had a dream, the same dream that had been ghosting him for almost a year now. The same dream that always woke him up in the middle of the night.

“Oh come on..” Kaito sighed, ruffling his hair softly. He leaned himself to the headboard, staring at the ceiling. He would always ended up like that, staring at the ceiling and drown in a deep thought.

Kaito dreamed of Tsukasa Kadoya, his lover, or ex lover, he didn’t know how to put it. Ever since Tsukasa left that day and never came back to his side. What he always had on the dream was Tsukasa sleeping beside him and then smiling sleepily when Kaito kissed that sleeping face. But at the end of the dream, there was the silhouette of Tsukasa walking away from him, never looking back no matter how many times Kaito called his name.

Kaito had been wandering to countless worlds to look for Tsukasa, before he found him in Blade’s world. Kaito almost wanted to cry, something that Kaito Daiki didn’t usually do, when he finally saw that cocky but beautiful face and heard that arrogant but pretty voice in BOARD’S restaurant. Kaito wanted to hug Tsukasa and never let him go again, but he couldn’t, he wouldn’t, because Tsukasa didn’t remember him.

Even after living together in Hikari Studio for almost six months, Tsukasa still couldn’t remember him. Sometimes Kaito thought Tsukasa didn’t want to remember him, a thought that made him wanted to slap himself. He never had the intention to tell Tsukasa the truth, he didn’t even know why. There was something on the back of his head that kept telling him that it would be better if Tsukasa didn’t know the truth.

Kaito patted his thighs, waking himself up from the deep thought, the same deep thought. He lied down on the bed, trying to get himself back to sleep.

*****************
“And it’s jealousy that’s in the way…”

“Oi, Kaito! Are you listening?!” Tsukasa shot, waking Kaito up from what looked like a daydream. They were having their lunch together in a small restaurant, Tsukasa invited him this morning, telling him that he had something to discuss with Kaito.

“I’m listening Tsukasa.” Kaito smiled, playing with his pasta. Kaito always had to remind himself to smile, no matter how painful it was to hear Tsukasa called him by his last name. “Yuusuke was being too nice again to Natsumelon right?”

Tsukasa sighed. “It’s Natsumikan.”

“Okay.” Kaito didn’t give a damn with the name, he never remembered any girls’ name though.

“Yuusuke preferred to go shopping with Natsumikan yesterday, even though he had promised to accompany me to buy tripod!” Tsukasa whined, ticking his index finger to the table. “He said Natsumikan would need his help because they were going to buy tons of supplies for the studio.” He continued, fisting his palms.

Kaito thought it was time for him to talk. “I think Yuusuke was right, Natsume-mikan probably need his help to bring the stuffs.” Kaito knew that wasn’t the best response because Tsukasa had already frowned before he finished talking. “You could have just asked me to accompany you.” He tried to ask.

Kaito believed he saw Tsukasa blushed before he answered. “I was sure you’d ditch my invitation.”

“But I’m here now.” Kaito exclaimed, trying to give Tsukasa a hint that he would never reject Tsukasa’s invitation. Seemed that Tsukasa caught the hint because his cheeks tinted pink and looking away from Kaito.

“Well..” was Tsukasa’s only word.

Tsukasa and Yuusuke had been dating for a couple months when Kaito first met him in Blade’s world. A fact that Kaito would like to refuse at first but decided to face the reality after, when he once saw Tsukasa laughed to what Yuusuke said with that free feeling that Kaito never witnessed before. That was probably why Kaito didn’t want to tell Tsukasa the truth.

“Then, you cannot say no if I ask you to accompany me to go shopping, agree?” Tsukasa stated, since it didn’t seem like a question at all to Kaito.

Kaito laughed softly, producing a slight questioning face from Tsukasa. He always liked this, Kaito thought in amused. “Only if I’m not busy searching for treasures.”

Tsukasa snorted his spaghetti. “No fair! You always busy with those stupid treasures!” Tsukasa said in annoyance. “That’s why you’re a smart mouthed thief, Kaito.”

Kaito cringed at his last name again, but then laughing a little at Tsukasa’s annoyed face. “Just kidding Tsukasa.” Tsukasa gave him a look but saying no words.

I’d love to spend all day with you, you know. Kaito said silently. The memories of he and Tsukasa spending their times together flooded his mind soon after.

**********************
“Coz I shouldn’t have to plead my case, so much love to save…”

That day Tsukasa spent almost all day in Hikari studio, having nothing to do. He was in his room, his body sprawled lazily on the bed. Being unoccupied, he travelled his eyes around the room, until he spotted an old looking suitcase -his suitcase- that he had been abandoning in the corner of his room for a long time. Tsukasa had only opened the suitcase once, back then after Eisuke allowed him to live in Hikari studio. He remembered nothing about his belongings inside the suitcase, except the clothes that must be his.

Tsukasa got up from the bed, walking slowly to reach the suitcase. “It’s been a long time…” He whispered, examining the suitcase. Tsukasa felt uneasy with the suitcase, because it reminded him with his past that had long gone. There was the urge to throw it away but he ended up opening it. It has nothing in it, since Tsukasa had emptied his clothes and other little stuffs. He exhaled, the uneasy feeling washed his body, making him almost shiver.

“I should’ve thrown it away long ago…” He was about to close the suitcase when he noticed a small bulge in the very corner of the suitcase’s pocket. “Eh? What’s that? I thought I had emptied everything on it.” He wondered, reaching for the thing inside the pocket.

“A Flash disk?” Tsukasa furrowed his eyebrows together. “Is this mine?” He said, standing up. He studied the pink flash disk on his palm. He liked pink, and that was why he somehow sure it was his. He strode to the desk in his room where his laptop was and plugged the newfound flash disk to the laptop, curious with what was inside.

Tsukasa found that there are lots of picture in it, and he could recognize most of the pictures had him in it. He clicked one of the pictures, wanting to see it clearly. His heart skipped a beat when he saw the larger version of it. A picture of him with Kaito.

“Kaito?” Tsukasa’s voice scattered, something in his head stung. Tsukasa clicked the ‘next’ button and saw another one, he kissed Kaito’s cheek on the picture. He saw more, pictures of Kaito alone or him alone, and next, and next. Tsukasa checked the date when the pictures had taken. “Almost one and a year ago,” He mumbled.

Tsukasa knew something was wrong, that flash disk was old, he knew that because he hadn’t seen it like forever -he didn’t remember that it was his though- and there was no way he could take picture with Kaito when he hadn’t met Kaito at the time the pictures were taken! Tsukasa felt confused, his head hurt now. He closed his eyes, trying to think clearly but only to find tons of unclear images of him and Kaito flooding his eyes. The room was spinning for Tsukasa, he tried to stand up from the chair but fell back weakly.

“What was that…” Tsukasa rubbed his his temples, the room was spinning like crazy now. “Kaito and me?” Tsukasa never experienced this kind of headache before this one was weird. His stomach flared, he wanted to vomit. “Did I know Kaito before? Why did he does not tell me that he knows me? Why did he doesn’t tell me that we were together?” Thousand of questions burned his head, striking him with unclear images of him and Kaito once again.

Tsukasa felt completely crushed, giving up and rest his head on the table. Someone cracked the door open. Tsukasa didn’t bother to look who was coming.

“Tsukasa did you see my --” There was Kaito who was coming in, cut his own words when he saw Tsukasa in the room. “Tsukasa? Are you sleeping?” He stepped closer, checking Tsukasa. Tsukasa didn’t move, didn’t produce any sound as well, but Kaito knew he wasn’t sleeping. His eyes landed on the laptop’s screen once he closed enough to Tsukasa. Kaito heard a loud thump in his ears, everything went white and he just stood there, unmoved.

“Can you tell me anything about this Kaito?” that came Tsukasa’s muffled sound. Tsukasa lifted his face, standing up successfully this time. He stared at Kaito who looked completely startled but still have his usual calm posture. “Kaito!” Tsukasa snapped.

Kaito sighed, looking at the window behind Tsukasa. He didn’t want to tell Tsukasa anything, mostly in this kind of awkward situation. But Kaito knew there was no way to run again. “You saw those pictures Tsukasa?” Kaito said, calmly. “Figured out something?” He added, voice shaking a little.

“Why didn’t you tell me that we were together?” Tsukasa demanded, desperately.

“I didn’t have to.”

“Of course you have to.”

Kaito always wanted Tsukasa to remember about him, about them, about everything, so they could have their normal life back. But he wanted Tsukasa to remember all by himself. At first, there was the urge to test Tsukasa’s love but then it changed. “I didn’t want to get in your relationship with Yuusuke.” Kaito finally explained.

“The way you smile and laugh when you spent the time with Yuusuke, I never saw it before.” Kaito added, smiling weakly. Tsukasa face hardened, didn’t know how to say.
“I never told anyone about this too,” Tsukasa started. “Since the first time I met you, I feel like I’ve known you for a very long time.” He explained. “You’ve always been in my daydream even though I’m with Yuusuke.”

Kaito wanted everything to be over soon, this was too painful. “That was just your imagination, you don’t remember me.”

“It wasn’t!” Tsukasa shouted, literally. “I know it wasn’t...Daiki…”

Been looking anywhere else but Tsukasa’s eyes, Kaito snapped his head when he heard Tsukasa said his first name. Once again, there were those memories that almost blinded him now. “Tsukasa…”

“I- I was too shy to admit that I actually liked to spend my time with you,” Tsukasa continued. “That I liked the way your smart mouth talk,” He sounded like he wasn’t in the earth anymore. “That I want to touch your face with my hands…”

Kaito thought he could explode anything, melting himself into Tsukasa so that they wouldn’t separate anymore but he had his own promise that he couldn’t broke. “It’s too late Tsukasa.” He finally said. “You can’t be selfish like that to Yuusuke.”

“But-“

Kaito put his index finger to Tsukasa’s lips, the familiar lips that he had been dreaming of since Tsukasa had gone. “Treasure must never be lost.” He withdrew his finger from Tsukasa’s lips. “Yuusuke treasures you like no one in the world Tsukasa, you shouldn’t doubt him and let him lose you.” Kaito definitely lied, if there was a person who treasure Tsukasa in the entire universe, it must be him.

“Have you remembered everything Tsukasa?” Tsukasa shook his head slowly, tears was forming in his eyes.

Kaito then turned his body, leaving the room, leaving Tsukasa that seemed petrified. When Tsukasa gained his senses back, Kaito had already gone. Tsukasa ran to chase Kaito, he dashed to Kaito’s room but found nothing. He went downstairs, checking every single room, including the dark room, but still found no sign of Kaito.

Tsukasa went outside, went to the street, went to the park and went to every single possible place he thought he could find Kaito but he wasn’t anywhere. A day, a week and then a month, he never heard anything about Kaito again.

********************

“Tsukasa, let’s go!” Yuusuke smiled, making his own eyes disappear. That day he had a promised with Tsukasa to go shopping, his lover favourite activity. “Tsukasa?” Yuusuke scooted closer to Tsukasa who seemed out of the planet. “Tsukasa…” He waved his hands in front of Tsukasa’s eyes trying to get Tsukasa back on reality. Tsukasa blinked his eyes, straightening his sitting position.

“Oh yes, Yuusuke? What?” Tsukasa smiled.

“I thought we’re going to go shopping today?” Yuusuke said, smiling back.

“Oh, today?”

Yuusuke didn’t have to argue about it, this kind of thing happened a lot. Tsukasa wasn’t Tsukasa anymore ever since Kaito left the house and was nowhere to be found. Yuusuke didn’t want to believe that it was Kaito who made Tsukasa like this, but his clear mind knew that it was. “It’s okay if you want to cancel it though…” Yuusuke said.

“Ah, no, let’s go.” Tsukasa stood up, clinging to Yuusuke.

***********************

“Coz there’s no saving us now…”

“Hey Tsukasa, do you think we need a new set of cushions?” Yuusuke asked, feeling the cushion’s material. No answer from Tsukasa. “Tsukasa?” Yuusuke turned himself around, Tsukasa wasn’t behind him anymore. Where did he go? He thought, darting his eyes everywhere. “Ah, there he is.” Yuusuke smiled, striding his way to Tsukasa.

“Tsukasa, don’t just left like that…” Yuusuke tapped Tsukasa’s back. Tsukasa didn’t move. His eyes pinned to something, someone. Yuusuke followed Tsukasa’s stare and found Kaito Daiki at the end of it. “Daiki!” Yuusuke almost shouted.

Tsukasa turned his head slowly, looking down to Yuusuke. “That boy is really Daiki, Yuusuke?”

Yuusuke looked up, staring at Tsukasa’s eyes, the eyes that wasn’t the same. “Yes, Tsukasa, that’s Daiki.” Tsukasa had already run his way to Kaito when Yuusuke finished talking, leaving Yuusuke alone.

“Daiki!” Tsukasa called, running closer to Kaito. The said boy looked stunned, rushing his way to go from there. “Daiki! Wait!” Tsukasa tried again. Kaito didn’t wait for Tsukasa, running away with all his might. Tsukasa followed Kaito’s reaction, running to chase him. In the half way Kaito stopped, in front of the park. Tsukasa sighed in relief, stopping his run as well. He was only a metre away from Kaito, and even the sight of Kaito’s back made him happy.

Kaito turned around, smiling. “Yo, Tsukasa.”

He said ‘Yo, Tsukasa’? That’s all? A voice in the back of Tsukasa’s head said. “Daiki…” Tsukasa broke in tears, falling on his knees.

Kaito looked shocked, but didn’t do any move. “Tsukasa…”

It was almost a terrifying moment for both. Tsukasa kept crying and Kaito kept still on his spot. Kaito was the first one to speak. “Don’t cry, Tsukasa…”

Tsukasa lifted his face, standing up slowly and dashing to hug Kaito. Kaito soon felt his T-shirt wet with tears, not that he minded it, the feeling of Tsukasa’s familiar warmth was blinded him. Kaito raised his hands to hug Tsukasa back, hesitating a moment before hugged him tightly.

The world inside Kaito eyes sparked in beautiful colours, blinding him completely. Those unclear images and silhouettes that had been ghosting him in his dreams suddenly looked clear. He could feel everything now, after being numb for more than a year. Tsukasa’s body warmth was the only thing connected him to reality and he wanted to feel that warmth with him forever.

Tsukasa cried even more, he had the same images and memories that became all clear now. He even remembered how Kaito’s kiss felt like, how soft his hair was, how Kaito’s fingers felt like on his body, and everything. Tsukasa’s cry had started to gain some kids’ on the park attention, Kaito had to soothe him by stroking Tsukasa’s back, and it gradually changed in hiccups.

“Daiki… Where have you been?” Tsukasa said between his hiccups, releasing himself from Kaito but only mere centimetres. “I remembered everything, Daiki.” He added, looking at Kaito’s eyes. Those eyes that he used to adore before he lost his memories.

“You did? That’s good.” Kaito replied, hands still stroking Tsukasa’s back. That wasn’t what Kaito wanted to say. He actually wanted Tsukasa to know how happy he was and how he loved Tsukasa very much.

“Where have you been? When did you come back? Why didn’t you come back to the house?”

“Wow, wait, wait!” Kaito laughed softly at Tsukasa’s sudden questions. “I’m gonna answer it one by one okay?” Tsukasa nodded, parting his body away from Kaito’s.

“I’ve been wandering to other worlds again, searching for treasures.” Kaito finally answered. “I just came back today, but sorry Tsukasa, I don’t have the intention to come back to the house.” Kaito added.

“Why?” Tsukasa’s voice broke.

Kaito bit his lip. “I just… I just don’t want to.”

“Are you going to leave again?”

Kaito went silent. Tsukasa seemed like he was about to cry anytime soon again. “I don’t know Tsukasa.”

Tsukasa buried his face in his palms, trying very hard not to cry. “Why did you come back then?” Tsukasa said in muffled voice. “If you’re not intending to stay, why did you come back?” Tsukasa’s voice was sharp, hooking Kaito up.

“I was trying to find the most priceless treasure in the universe,” There was a slight blush on Kaito’s face. “But I was wrong, I realized that the most priceless treasure in the universe for me is just you.”

“Daiki…”

“At first I came back just to see if you’re okay and all, but I don’t think I could leave again.” Kaito continued.

“So don’t.”

“I decided the goal of my journey, Tsukasa.” Kaito seemed to remind Tsukasa with his ‘motto’.

“Don’t leave!” Tsukasa practically shrieked. Kaito was about to say something when he opened his mouth, but in the end nothing came up.

“Don’t leave, Daiki…” That wasn’t Tsukasa who spoke, it was Yuusuke.

Tsukasa and Kaito shocked, both didn’t realized that Yuusuka was near them, been listening their conversation. “Yuusuke…” Tsukasa was the first one called. Yuusuke walked slowly them, face looking sad and disturbed.

“I’m sorry for suddenly butting in, and I’d been listening to your conversation, sorry…”

Tsukasa shook his head, telling him it was okay while Kaito only shrugged.

“Daiki, don’t leave. Don’t ever leave Tsukasa again.” Yuusuke sounded almost desperate and down. “Stay here and be by Tsukasa’s side.”

Kaito didn’t get it, Did Yuusuke just encourage him to be with Tsukasa? He thought. “What do you mean Yuusuke?”

“You guys should not be apart, Tsukasa needs his strength, and his only strength is you only, Kaito.” Yuusuke looked at Kaito’s eyes intensely, showing Kaito that he was serious about it all.

The tears started forming in Tsukasa’s eyes again, whilst Kaito let out an awkward laugh. “I don’t get it, you ARE Tsukasa’s boyfriend, and you’re telling me to be with Tsukasa?”

“Yes, because that’s the best thing to do.”

“And you’re implying that you’re giving up your relationship with Tsukasa?” Tsukasa sobbed, Kaito turned his head solemnly.

“That’s the best option.” Yuusuke smiled, but everyone could tell that he was faking it.

“I don’t know you could be this selfish, Yuusuke.” Kaito snorted.

Tsukasa still sobbed. “Yuusuke, I’m sorry…”

Yuusuke shifted his gaze to Tsukasa, stepping closer to Tsukasa and caressing his side. “You don’t have to say sorry Tsukasa.” He smiled again, this time not faking it and it’s soothing Tsukasa very much. Tsukasa loved Yuusuke’s smile very much though.

Yuusuke turned himself back to face Kaito again, once Tsukasa seemed to be calmer. “I maybe possess Tsukasa’s body, but his heart belongs to you.” Tsukasa cried despite he was just getting calm a moment ago.

“When the verdict’s in it’s us who’s gonna lose…”

“Tsukasa was never being the same again since you left, Daiki.” Yuusuke started. “And I actually realized from the very first that Tsukasa that I know isn’t actually Tsukasa.” He added to cut Kaito who was going to interrupt. “I knew his heart belongs to someone else since the first time I looked into his eyes.”

Tsukasa dropped to the asphalt on his knee, couldn’t take it anymore, everything was too much for his mind to register. Yuusuke was still willing to be his boyfriend, taking care of him, cheering him up whenever he got down and even bare his arrogant and selfish attitudes despite the fact that he knew Tsukasa could never love him fully. Tsukasa felt like banging his head on the asphalt, punishing himself for being such a jerk.

“But Tsukasa looked happy when you guys together! I never saw that kind of expression when I was with him!” Kaito argued, almost losing his composure, all of this was too sudden and didn’t please him at all.

Yuusuke shook his head slowly. “No, you got it wrong, Daiki.” He exhaled, looking away from both figures. “It’s jealousy that’s in the way, so you thought like that.”

“But I-“

“I’m the one who spends the closest moment with Tsukasa for the past year. IIt makes me the one who knows Tsukasa better than anyone at least about what happened in the last one year.” Yuusuke rarely being a cocky or something, but this time he needed to be cocky to get Kaito senses. Kaito shut his mouth, registering what Yuusuke said and secretly agreeing it.

“Tsukasa I’m sorry for not telling you about how I actually think,” Yuusuke came closer to kneel down beside Tsukasa, bringing Tsukasa up into sitting position. “I was so selfish to have you only for myself, even though I knew the truth.”

Tsukasa looked at Yuusuke’s eyes with his damped eyes, seemed that he had been longing for that warm eyes forever. “I’m sorry Yuusuke…” Yuusuke shook his head, smiling.

Kaito looked down to the ground, sighing audibly. Yuusuke supported Tsukasa to stand up, guiding him to Kaito. “Daiki, you’ve been suffering a lot for a very long time, it’s time for you to get what you’ve lost.” Yuusuke assured.

Kaito took Tsukasa from Yuusuke’s arms. “What about you?”

“Me?” Yuusuke chuckled. “My biggest happiness is to see Tsukasa happy, nothing else. Now he’s happy with you, I’m over.” By that, Yuusuke patted Kaito and Tsukasa’s arms, smiling liked he always did.

“And that’s the truth, oh, oh, oh yeah… That’s the truth…”

*********************
SO SORRY FOR THE ULTIMATE SAPPYNESS m(__)m