When: Friday night, August 26
Where: Coming into town along Main Street
Who: Carrot Ironfoundersson & OPEN
What: Someone's about to be very, very, very confused
Rating: Depends on who finds him! For Carrot's part, probably no higher than G
(
If you could kindly direct me to the Hubwards Gate... )
It would be impossible, Abe thought, to truly explain his known origins. He didn't know how far Carrot's world's science had progressed. Telling the man that he'd been found in a small cylindrical tank and then having to explain the significance of Abraham Lincoln's date of death being inscribed near the tank as a relation to his name seemed not only too complex but too detailed of an explanation.
Abe was about to savor his second egg when the question arouse, "Hm? Yes."
And then a moment after that he nodded. "I was aware of that possibility, captain. Don't worry, though. I've got you covered. When I invited you to eat I did not expect you to pay."
He bit into his second hard boiled egg with a contented sound. Though not centuries old, the day of letting it out certainly added that hint of familiarity to the flavor.
"Tell me captain, are there any non humans in your dimension that are sentient?" Abe asked, curious.
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He was troubled by the situation with the money. Carrot never took advantage of people's generosity. Every bar and tavern in the city felt free to offer him his meals gratis whenever he came in, secure in the knowledge that he'd insist on paying. Sometimes someone in the Watch would stand the group a round of drinks, but Carrot scrupulously made sure he also paid for his share of rounds, even though he rarely drank alcohol. He all but wrote it down. Dwarfs paid their debts - and did their damnedest never to let themselves get into debt in the first place.
"I can't allow that, Mr Sapien," he said solemnly. "It's kind of you, but it just wouldn't be right."
On the other hand, he thought, looking at the coins again, what was he to do? He didn't actually carry dollars with him; few but the wealthy did. At about ten dollars, one meal here would cost nearly a week's pay.
He was still staring at the numbers on the menu when the question surprised him. "Nonhumans? Of course, sir. Lots." It seemed a peculiar question; given the evidence of Abraham himself, Carrot had naturally concluded that this Roundworld was also generously populated with sentient nonhumans. What a strange world it would be that had only humans in it! Though this world was strange enough already. "Ankh-Morpork is the second largest dwarf city on the Disc," he said, "though I was raised in the mines up at Copperhead, and only came to the city when the time came for me to be a human. There are trolls, of course, and gnomes, gnolls - well, they're sort of sentient, gnolls. The gargoyles - they're a sort of troll subspecies, though they're not very like your average troll. The undead races: vampires, zombies, bogeymen, werewolves..."
Neither his voice nor his face changed on the last one, but there was a warmth behind it that the others didn't have. He cleared his throat and went on. "And there's an orangutan, sir. Just one, the Librarian. And an intelligent talking dog I know called Gaspode. You get a few peculiarities like that, so close to the University. Why do you ask?"
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"Captain," Abe said softly, sensing the sensitivity to Abraham's offer. "Perhaps we can work something out? I will pay for this meal and at some point you might pay me back? It doesn't have to be monetarily, of course. Perhaps you will be able to help me in some way? Offer a service or a product? A trade or barter? If you do decide to stay in town there is a stipend given and at that point you would have more than enough to pay me back. Regardless I would be more than happy to make up the difference of money of this meal." He gestured toward the change Carrot had in front of him.
Abraham listened to the plethora of creatures Carrot described. It was like the Troll Market, he thought. He cocked his head at the unusual emotion that flitted toward him at 'werewolves' but said nothing.
"An orangutan?" Certainly not a sentient creature on Earth. At least as far as scientists were able to tell. "In the dimension I come from most inhuman creatures are in hiding. I am sure you will find this to be unique, though, from person to person in town depending on our origins. But in my world the prominent and assumed only sentient creature on Earth are humans. Though in the past it was much different. Most all of the creatures you have mentioned also exist on Earth but are not prominent nor known to be anything more than mythology," Abe said a little sadly. "In fact, most are very dangerous. In my dimension my job was to help find the most dangerous magical beings and help stop them from their continued massacre. I would love to compare the creatures from our worlds, captain."
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On the other hand, paying him back would necessitate staying here for some length of time. When he found a way to get back, he wouldn't feel right about leaving if he were still in debt. Then again, if he had got here and was able to get home again, maybe he could return at some point to pay his debt.
He would have to make it work. He didn't have a choice. He nodded, trying to mask his reluctance with gratitude. "Well. Thank you, sir. I will repay you as soon as I'm able." Almost, he could hear Nobby and Colon laughing at him. The two of them mooched off others whenever the opportunity presented itself, and Carrot didn't hold it against them; it was just their way. But he just couldn't be comfortable behaving like that himself.
Much easier to talk about the Discworld, and the ways in which it differed from the world in which he now found himself. If this was the wizards' work, he admired their attention to detail. "Only the one orangutan," he reiterated. "I'm told he used to be a wizard, only some sort of magical accident transformed him into an orangutan, and he's never wanted to be changed back. Good man, though. He was on that flight to Cori Celesti, too. Of course he stowed away," he added matter-of-factly, "and nearly caused us to run out of air. But once we solved that, he was quite a good comrade."
He listened to Abe's description, the puzzled line reappearing between his brows. "But why should so many of them be dangerous? That is to say, of course some vampires and werewolves do cause trouble. I've run into a few of those." Literally run into, as in physically tackled, in one particular case. "But every race has a few bad apples, don't they? Most of the nonhumans are every bit as civilized and law-abiding as most of the humans - well. Generally law-abiding." He thought about it some more. "The really important laws anyway."
Not that Carrot thought any laws were unimportant. But he'd come to understand that certain crimes, like Tax Evasion for instance, or Loitering, got broken fairly regularly as a matter of course, and weren't worth getting bothered about. Whereas he had a much lower tolerance level for, say, unprovoked bloody murder. Or showing disrespect toward the elderly.
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