"In Which Merlin Loses the Ability to Hug Unicorns"
Who: Arthur and Merlin
What: Most awkward date night you'll ever encounter
When: Day after this
Where: Some Restaurant and then the Castle
Rating: PG-13!!
Status: Complete
Arthur rubbed his hand over his eyes as he headed out of the park. The night before had been...the night before. He wasn't sure how to categorize peevishness mingled with a stupid amount of affection. Merlin managed to bring out both odd qualities at the same time. He often did. There was no earthly reason for Arthur to feel as hell bent on setting the record straight as he did now. Merlin could continue to believe or disbelieve what he chose to, so long as Arthur knew what he felt.
That didn't explain why his feet were taking him toward the center of town, or why his eyes roved over the shop signs looking for something...something to get rid of Merlin's obnoxiously blue eyes staring at him pathetically.
There had to be something he could do to prove what he had said. He just had to find it first.
~*~
Merlin was kind of bored. He'd played with Daisy, went into town and bought some clothes, looked through a few magic books at the book store (which, frankly, seemed a bit off and couldn't compare to his own book or the beautiful one Endora had left him.) Then he'd come back to the castle and played with Daisy again.
Where was Arthur, anyway? He sort of wouldn't mind spending some time with the git right about now. But he'd been absent from the castle when Merlin had left, and it seemed he wasn't back yet. Another hour or so, and Merlin would start to fret. Now, he'd settle for mildly apprehensive.
~*~
Another hour or so found Arthur in a state of utter bewilderment that came from talking to people in this town. His head was bowed low as he walked the corridors of their small castle, body moving him toward the one room he called his. There was nothing for it.
He'd made "dinner reservations". Truly the most disconcerting event of the week.
"We're going out tonight," he said with no preamble when he finally came upon Merlin.
Merlin gaped, forgetting the speech/rant he'd planned about Arthur needing to warn him when he'd be gone that long, or Merlin would be forced to assume he was lying bloodied on a street again somewhere. "We're doing what now?"
"We," Arthur gestured between the two of them, "are going to dine out."
"Em," Merlin blinked. "Okay. Mind if I ask why?"
"Yes, as a matter of fact I do. I'm not going to have to order you to eat with me, am I?" Arthur arched a brow expectantly, giving in to Daisy's restless jumping in front of him. He crouched down and scratched between the puppies ears, but his eyes never left Merlin's face. "Well?"
"Well" yourself, Merlin thought. Honestly, Arthur had to know that looking up at him like that, his eyes quite matched the pleading shininess of the puppy's he was petting. "Alright," he answered. "Sure. Em... when?"
"Idiot," Arthur scoffed and made to stand, tucking Daisy under his arm. "Five o'clock, which gives you two hours to bathe."
Merlin crossed his arms. "What makes you think I need two hours to bathe? And-- wait-- am I supposed to be getting dressed up or something?"
"No, but you smell like you've been rolling around outside with the dog all day."
To which, Merlin only grinned sheepishly. He couldn't exactly deny that, after all. "Well then. I will see you at five."
That drew Arthur up short and he huffed a sharp, "Right."
~*~
Two hours later, Merlin was standing in front of the mirror, hair still damp, wondering if he looked alright in the tan colored pants and red shirt with buttons down the front. This whole modern clothing thing still baffled him a bit. Back in his time, he'd only owned three outfits, plus one to sleep in, and those were chosen completely for comfort and convenience. Dressing to look good wasn't something he fully understood. But right now, he wanted to.
"Are you ready yet?" Arthur asked, pushing open the door and leaning against the frame.
Merlin turned around and blinked. Arthur, apparently, had no trouble picking nice attire. Then again, he'd had to dress to look good his entire life.
Not that Merlin thought it would be possible for him to look anything but good, no matter what he wore.
He gave a quick nod. "Yeah. I'm ready."
"For God's sake," Arthur grumbled, crossing the room to Merlin's side. He undid the top few buttons and fixed them in proper order, untucking the collar of the shirt. His hands lingered on Merlin's shoulders as he brought his gaze to the other boy's face. "It's no wonder all your clothing are rags."
Merlin rolled his eyes as Arthur tended to his shirt. "You know Sire, you did trust me to dress you nearly every day back home. Apparently you found me competent enough then."
Then he noticed Arthur's eyes on him, and ducked his head, blushing. "Shouldn't we be going? The em... restaurant... is expecting us."
"Yes, that is quite the puzzle, isn't it?" Arthur eyed Merlin up and down, assessing the damage and determining he looked fine. "We have time." He tilted his chin in consideration, leaning forward until his lips brushed the curve of Merlin's ear. "I want you to dress like this more often."
Merlin just about turned the colour of his shirt, and shivered inside and possibly out as well. "I can do that," he answered, slightly muffled once he'd dropped his face to Arthur's shoulder.
"Of course you can, I ordered you to." Arthur smirked, letting his lips drag across Merlin's cheek and then pulled away. "Now that you look halfway decent, we should go."
"Right," Merlin agreed, attempting to get his bearings. He coughed and ducked his head again, then grinned crookedly. "After you, Sire."
Shaking his head, Arthur pushed the door open the whole way. "Ladies first."
Merlin raised his eyebrows and stepped aside. "No, no. I insist. Age before beauty, after all."
"I'm not quite sure I know how old you are, Merlin." Just because they had discovered the idiot's birthday, didn't mean they knew that. Arthur folded his arms across his chest and then made a sweeping gesture toward the door.
"Fine," Merlin finally relented, going through the door and the turning to reach for Arthur's wrist, tugging him along. "Anyway, I'm twenty. I'm nearly certain of it."
"Oh, he thinks he's twenty, does he?"
Arthur allowed himself to be dragged out of the bedroom and down the hall before he forced Merlin to slow. What Merlin didn't know, wouldn't hurt him, after all. Arthur had set reservations, as the giggling girl behind the odd table had told him, but she'd added that there were very few for that evening and they could be quite a few minutes late and receive a table.
Arthur was counting on that promise to hold.
Merlin raised his eyebrows and turned to look back at Arthur. "Why are we stopping? Is the back of my shirt wrinkled or something?"
"We aren't stopping, Merlin." Arthur fell into step beside Merlin, freeing his arm from the tight hold.
"But you--" slowed down, Merlin was about to say. Then he realized they were indeed still walking, but Arthur was close to his side now. Ah. He cleared his throat. "So then... where are we going, exactly?"
Arthur smirked and grasped Merlin's hand. Flustering Merlin came so easily to him sometimes, and it never failed to make Arthur's day just that much brighter. An off-balance Merlin was a predictable one. "Don't you enjoy surprises?"
Merlin glared down at that hand suspiciously, but didn't let go. "I suppose I do," he answered slowly. "It's just that a 'surprise' from you usually involves an extended hunting trip or a special round of moving target practice with Merlin as the target."
"Come on, you know that's just a bit of fun. Harmless." Arthur valiantly kept a straight face. "Would I ever make you dress up this nicely just to watch you ruin it in the mud?"
"Absolutely," Merlin answered without missing a beat. "It would only make it that much more fun for you."
"You're probably right. However, I'm unarmed. One would think that would be hint enough."
Deciding this was sufficient enough (for now), Merlin nodded and laced his fingers through Arthur's. "Fine. But if this turns out to be anything prattish, I will make sure you don't see Daisy for a week."
Arthur scoffed and pushed open the heavy outer doors of the castle, leading to a mild spring night. Arthur took a sharp breath of fresh air and hummed. Merlin needed to work on his threats. He couldn't honestly believe that was threatening. "Seeing how her bed is in my room, you can hardly call that a threat."
Hmph. He had a point. "I will put an invisibility charm on her so that only I can see her," he amended, smirking. "But you don't have to worry about it, do you? Because this is not going to be anything prattish."
"Can a spell be that specialized?" Arthur asked, momentarily frowning. He had seen, for the most part, the extent of Merlin's powers, he had read all the library had to offer on their particular variations of what Merlin may one day know, but not once did any of the tales mention anything as specific as that.
It sounded absurd.
Which was highly odd.
"Of course not. You need to learn to trust me, Merlin."
Mostly, Merlin had been kidding about the invisibility spell. Now, he tilted his head to think about it. "Huh... you know... I have no idea," he admitted with a small grin. "Probably. But I don't know how yet." Then he used their linked hands to tug himself closer and nudge Arthur's shoulder. "And I do trust you."
"You had better," Arthur muttered, leading Merlin out of the park and onto the curb.
Merlin followed, furrowing his brow. Arthur was treating that last point with a good amount of seriousness. A strange contrast against the usual banter. But maybe Merlin was just reading too much into it. "I've been working on the spell," he said abruptly, mostly to break the silence but also because he did actually want to tell Arthur. "I don't think it will be long now. Before it works the right way."
Arthur didn't dare turn to look at whatever ridiculous expression Merlin was making. The entire tone of their conversation had become tainted, and Arthur was man enough to admit that it was partially his fault.
"You won't be experimenting with it on me again."
Merlin snorted, seeing no reason why the mood couldn't be lifted again. "Isn't trust supposed to work both ways, Sire?"
"I trust you. Your magic is quite a different thing entirely. Especially after that flying spell."
Grinning brightly, Merlin clutched Arthur's hand tighter and muttered the words before Arthur would even realize he had. They were only floating several inches, and for only enough time for Merlin to quip, "This one, you mean?" before he brought them down again, snickering.
Arthur took his time to settle his startled breathing before soundly smacking the back of Merlin's head.
"Yes. That one."
Even as he rubbed the sore spot on his head, Merlin continued to laugh. "I just thought it would help us get there faster. Are you sure you don't want me to continue?" Merlin spent so much time worrying about Arthur in life-or-death situations, he had only now realized how amusing it was to see the prince so fearful of something Merlin knew wouldn't hurt him.
"We're walking."
Merlin just smiled wider, and moved closer to Arthur's side.
~*~
Arthur's stomach was doing the oddest thing. It was fluttering like there was a small bird caught in the dead center and doing aerial somersaults to some frantic tune that Arthur's body couldn't keep up with. He pushed open the door to the eatery and gestured for Merlin to enter before him.
Merlin glanced at Arthur for a moment. He almost said something about the disturbingly hospitable gesture, but there was something about Arthur's expression that made him hold his tongue. Calling it nervousness seemed a bit hard to believe, and yet, that was what it looked like. Merlin managed a smile that he hoped looked appreciative or maybe reassuring, and stepped through the door.
"It's nice," he commented slightly under his breath, eyes wandering over the elegantly adorned room. And it was. Probably the nicest, most lavish place he'd seen since leaving Camelot.
Merlin's eyes were really too big for his face. Arthur's bird friend seemed to be banging its head under his ribcage relentlessly. He eyed the woman behind the podium, and she hurried to lead them to one of the free tables.
He smiled tightly at her comment about enjoying themselves as he sank down onto one of the chairs.
Merlin still didn't really have this restaurant situation down fully. Since arriving here, he'd been to one or two. But not one like this, and the concept of a menu still baffled him. Having so many choices for something to eat... and then telling someone to go and make it for you? It wasn't the life of a farmer, or a manservant. Still, he let his eyes skim down the page, trying to decide what looked most appetizing.
He thought maybe he should say something, so for a moment, he glanced up from the menu and across the table at Arthur. Something gave a somersault in his chest as his eyes swept over the well-defined face, and he quickly looked back down. Suddenly, he had absolutely nothing to say. Suddenly, he wondered if he was in way over his head here.
Merlin wasn't very subtle. Arthur would have thought by now there would have been some improvement in that area. The bird was settling, hopefully for good, because he would look foolish sitting there and eating nothing.
"What is it?" he asked, resigned to the insufficient explanation he was sure to get.
"Nothing," Merlin answered quickly, eyes flickering up and down again. It was the truth, honestly. The whole problem was not knowing what to say, after all. "Do you know what you're having to eat?"
"Steak." Arthur didn't even look down at the list before him. "You're lying."
Merlin rolled his eyes, knowing Arthur wouldn't be appeased until he confessed whatever 'deep dark secret' he was convinced Merlin was hiding. "I supposed I'm just... overwhelmed," he said, realizing this was just as much the truth as his first answer.
Sighing heavily, Arthur cast aside his menu and folded his hands on the table. Merlin being overwhelmed came as no shock to Arthur. Truth be told, Arthur couldn't say he was unaffected as well. This was veering dangerously toward courtship. Something for girls. And despite what he liked to say, Merlin was not a girl.
"Do you want to stay here?"
"Here, in the restaurant?" Merlin asked, closing his own menu and settling an only-slightly wavering gaze on Arthur. "Yes, of course. I like it," he half-smiled. "Really. It's just... em... you know."
"Overwhelming?" Arthur's lips quirked into a half smile. Merlin's reaction wasn't the one he had hoped for. Though, what he hoped for remained elusive. One thing Arthur knew with a great deal of certainty that if Merlin remained wound tight, Arthur would remain on edge and this would prove to be the most tedious evening he had endured since arriving here.
Heart fluttering at Arthur's understanding smile, Merlin laughed. "Right. That." He took a breath, wondering if it was only his imagination that Arthur didn't seem totally at ease either. He decided it probably wasn't, and hesitantly reached across the table and laid a hand on Arthur's folded ones. "Really, though. I'm glad we're doing this. Thank you."
"I have to admit," Arthur began, letting out a breath he hadn't been aware he'd kept trapped inside, "This could be going a good deal worse."
He gazed at his covered hands and smirked, catching Merlin's wrist. "Are you even hungry?"
That was extremely close to a compliment. Merlin looked smilingly at Arthur and swiped a thumb along Arthur's fingers, starting to feel more relaxed. He was hungry, or would be more so if his stomach didn't feel like it was home to a nest of hyperactive owls. In a good way, he was pretty sure. But they were starting to calm down a little. "Yes. Why, aren't you?"
~*~
Arthur drowsily led Merlin back from the restaurant to the park, stomach satisfied and brain fuzzed from wine. The night had been, dare he say it, nice, and he didn't want to jeopardize it. So he didn't speak, in the hopes Merlin would follow his cue and say nothing either. With the fresh, night air clearing his senses, Arthur realized that was logically impossible and resigned himself to being chattered at to fill the silence.
It's not like Merlin could really help it. He just liked to talk. He talked when he was happy, or nervous, or distressed, and right now, he was two out of those three. He wasn't even sure what he was saying anymore. But the night was nice, and the air was nice, and the dinner had been nice and so had the wine, so really, what he was saying probably didn't matter. Then he saw their castle a few paces away, and actually comprehended himself saying, "Em, well-- this was-- fun."
"You are the worst drunk I've ever had the displeasure of hanging about with in the history of the entire world," Arthur grumbled, waving his hand until it fell against the back of Merlin's head and slid down to his neck. "Quite truly the worst."
Merlin made a noise that was somewhat akin to an insulted gasp, but turned into a laugh along the way. "I'm not drunk!" he protested. "Just-- fuzzy. A little. Not drunk."
"Fuzzy?" Arthur's lips quirked into an easy smirk and he ruffled the back of Merlin's hair.
Which kind of made Merlin giggle a little, and then blush because he'd giggled. He covered his mouth with his hand, then his whole face instead. "Definitely not drunk," came the slightly muffled comment from behind his palm.
"No, of course you aren't." Arthur wound his arm around Merlin's shoulders and drew him close, for safety and speed's sake. If Merlin fell over now, well, Arthur could manage carrying him, but it wasn't exactly his idea of a fun time. "It takes a great deal more alcohol to make you unsteady," he continued loftily.
Whatever Arthur's reason might have been for the gesture, Merlin wasn't wasting it. He nuzzled close and laughed. "A great deal more," he agreed, nodding. They made their way into the castle. Not wanting to wake anyone who might be sleeping-- especially not Uther, who really, really shouldn't see them like this-- Merlin spoke quietly. "Anyway, thank you for tonight." He was pretty sure somewhere earlier in the evening, he'd said that already. Maybe a few times. But he meant it enough to say it again. Whatever had possessed Arthur to plan this, Merlin was glad for it.
Arthur nodded. Heat coiled low in his stomach as Merlin's nose buried against his neck and prickles crept down his back. He tightened his hold a fraction, whether in warning or encouragement. Alcohol made these things more confusing. He hadn't nearly consumed as much as he would have wished to, given the circumstances, but the amount he'd had was substantial in it's own right.
The drinks here were sweeter, but no less potent.
"Come on, let's get back to the room."
For some reason, a small hoard of butterflies went zipping through Merlin's heart and stomach. "Kay," he agreed. Still tucked into Arthur's side, he stepped off down the hall, wondering if the heavy, prickling feeling hanging around them was only his imagination, or because of the wine. At the same time, Merlin was sure the effects of the wine were beginning to ebb away, losing out to the unexplainable idea that something was about to happen, something big that made his heart pound. "After you, Sire," he said in an unintentionally low voice when they reached the bedroom door.
A few seconds passed when Arthur simply stood there eying the inside of Merlin's ear, unfortunately the only bit he could eye, before determining Merlin was, in fact, drunker than he imagined. He pushed open the door and dragged Merlin in through it before shutting it with a loud thunk.
The movement came as a bit of a surprise, and Merlin inhaled sharply, eyes widening as he lifted them and turned his face to look at Arthur. The look he saw there was one he was pretty sure he wasn't familiar with. But he was pretty sure he didn't want it to go away. Merlin shivered lightly. The fog in his mind might have started to clear a little, but it didn't make him any more certain of what to do. "Arthur...?" he tried, voice catching.
Merlin shuddered under Arthur's hand. Silence spread tight and heavy in the room following Merlin's inquiry. Arthur didn't know what was wrong with him.
And there had to be something unerringly wrong.
He dragged his thumb in loose circles over Merlin's shoulders, focusing on the movement over the sound of blood whooshing in his ears. The feeling only came before a fight. Usually a challenging one at that, but Merlin wasn't a fighter. Morgana insisted he was a "lover" and the word tasted odd on his tongue even though he'd never repeated it.
"Hm? What is it?"
"I... I don't know," was Merlin's best answer, and it came with a small, nervous laugh. Holding Arthur's gaze made the feeling in his stomach intensify to the point of bursting, so he shot his eyes toward his feet. He brought an ever-so-slightly trembling hand to his shoulder, to rest atop Arthur's. "I'm em... not really sure what to do here." The admittance came quietly, and with it was the acknowledgment that there was definitely something he thought might be happening. Something more than just saying good night, and going to sleep.
"Thankfully, we've never expected you to think, have we?" Though, Arthur thought with grim determination, he had no better clue what would occur next than Merlin did.
The jibe made Merlin feel slightly more comfortable, though not much. He laughed again, though, and decided maybe they should at least sit down. Gripping Arthur's hand, he led them toward the bed and took a seat, tugging Arthur down beside him. "M-maybe we should just... turn in for the night."
"Merlin." Arthur sat alongside Merlin and found himself reaching for the idiot's face. There was something about him that left Arthur stuck fast in place. There always had been. His fingers grazed the side of Merlin's chin as Arthur considered him. "What do you want?"
Flushed, Merlin leaned into Arthur's hand and shut his eyes. He was feeling so much, all at once, it was like he was drowning. But then, so much of what he was feeling was... was good, and maybe he didn't want to come up for air.
But he was confused, and uncertain... and maybe the slightest bit terrified, and his heart wasn't going to stay in his chest much longer if it kept on pounding in the manner it was. Merlin didn't know how to answer Arthur's question, so he did the only thing he could think of. He closed the distance, and kissed him.
This, at least, made sense to him. This, he understood. And most importantly, he wouldn't have to talk.
Arthur slid his fingers back into Merlin's hair, gliding over Merlin's too big ears as he moved to cradle his head. Blood pushed against his ear drums as he took what Merlin gave him without question. Too long had he been restraining himself and goddamn he was going to take what he wanted.
Now.
Had Merlin been anyone else, this never would have been a problem. Emotions got tangled and snarled, coiling within his chest in a large lump that made breathing impossibly hard and his heart beat improbably fast to compensate. And it was all Merlin's fault. He curled Merlin's hair around his fingers tugged and pushing until he had Merlin pushed up against the headboard of the bed.
"You never answered my question," he breathed harshly against Merlin's lips. "What do you want from me?"
Arthur's eager reaction startled Merlin, but it was not unwelcome. It made Merlin dizzy and breathless, and somehow that helped him forget the confusion and fear a little. Enough that he could open his eyes, and look into Arthur's, and somehow manage a choked answer. "Arthur, I just... I want... this." He kissed him again, more forceful than usual, hopefully leaving no room for questioning because if he had to explain any further, he was going to start thinking too hard about it again and that would do no good. "You."
Determined to ignore the trembling in his hands, Arthur kissed and sucked his way slowly down Merlin's jaw, over the bump of his chin and down the front of his throat, hovering a moment over Merlin's Adam's apple. His breathing came out heavy and fast, hot as he tried to wrestle his fraying thoughts in order.
But God it was harder than he expected it to be. How long had he been denying them both when he could have had anything he wanted with a simple look? He dusted his lips over the lump in Merlin's throat and resolutely told himself to stop thinking.
When, after all, had it done either of them good?
Maybe there was something to be said for instinct when it came to... this sort of thing. Because as clueless as Merlin was, there was something inside of him that seemed desperate to take over. And really, Merlin was only all too eager to let it. He gasped softly and slid his fingers into Arthur's hair, dragging them along his scalp and pressing down, encouraging Arthur to continue. God, Arthur had to continue.
At this point, Merlin couldn't stop to think if he tried. His mind was in a thousand places, and yet somehow, only one clear image broke through the haze. Arthur... Arthur and Arthur's lips and hands and breath and body and... and Merlin felt a fire spreading inside him that he'd never experienced and had no name for.
He wasn't quite sure when it happened, but somehow in one of his brief moments of awareness, he noticed that he'd pulled Arthur back up and that his fingers were fumbling with the buttons of his shirt.
Batting away Merlin's fingers, Arthur merely shrugged the shirt off over his head and tossed it aside without caring where it landed. He gazed down upon Merlin's face and bit back the groan that threatened to escape him. Arthur nuzzled the bare skin at the dip between Merlin's shoulder and neck, mouthing a kiss to the stretch of skin, before pulling back.
How far would be too far, he wondered, tugging on the collar of Merlin's shirt in a silent command to remove it.
For a moment, Merlin froze again. Which was ridiculous. Because really, it wasn't as though he'd never seen Arthur without a shirt on before. But then again, he knew this was very, very different from any of those times. So he let himself stare. Only for a moment though, before he realized what Arthur wanted, and somehow managed to catch his breath long enough to rid himself of his own shirt.
He looked up at Arthur again, unsure of what exactly he was waiting for.
Arthur's eyes roamed over the pale expanse of flesh presented to him and found himself wanting to push Merlin into the sunlight to get some color into his skin. His fingers moved in silent sweeps over Merlin's scrawny chest, amazed and unnerved by how easy it was to feel ribs beneath the skin. On anyone else it would be off-putting, on Merlin it only made too much sense. Arthur dragged his finger down Merlin's sternum and paused with a thoughtful hum.
Merlin was too nervous for this. So, he proceeded to assault Merlin's mouth to the best extent of his skills.
It was a wonder Merlin hadn't passed out yet, with how quick and short his breaths became while Arthur's fingers traveled. Then he couldn't breathe at all, since Arthur was suddenly kissing him again. It was less of a decision and more of a reflex when Merlin finally just... let go. Why was he so nervous, anyway? Really... it was only Arthur. He'd put his life in Arthur's hands time and time again, and trusted him with it. He loved Arthur. And maybe it had taken a little too long, but he could see now that even if Arthur had more trouble than he did saying it aloud, it didn't mean he hadn't made it clear.
Nerves forgotten, ignoring that he had no idea what he was doing, Merlin pulled Arthur down and let the instinct take over.
************************************
EPIC-FADEOUT-OF-VANILLA!DANI-PROPORTIONS
************************************
What: Most awkward date night you'll ever encounter
When: Day after this
Where: Some Restaurant and then the Castle
Rating: PG-13!!
Status: Complete
Arthur rubbed his hand over his eyes as he headed out of the park. The night before had been...the night before. He wasn't sure how to categorize peevishness mingled with a stupid amount of affection. Merlin managed to bring out both odd qualities at the same time. He often did. There was no earthly reason for Arthur to feel as hell bent on setting the record straight as he did now. Merlin could continue to believe or disbelieve what he chose to, so long as Arthur knew what he felt.
That didn't explain why his feet were taking him toward the center of town, or why his eyes roved over the shop signs looking for something...something to get rid of Merlin's obnoxiously blue eyes staring at him pathetically.
There had to be something he could do to prove what he had said. He just had to find it first.
~*~
Merlin was kind of bored. He'd played with Daisy, went into town and bought some clothes, looked through a few magic books at the book store (which, frankly, seemed a bit off and couldn't compare to his own book or the beautiful one Endora had left him.) Then he'd come back to the castle and played with Daisy again.
Where was Arthur, anyway? He sort of wouldn't mind spending some time with the git right about now. But he'd been absent from the castle when Merlin had left, and it seemed he wasn't back yet. Another hour or so, and Merlin would start to fret. Now, he'd settle for mildly apprehensive.
~*~
Another hour or so found Arthur in a state of utter bewilderment that came from talking to people in this town. His head was bowed low as he walked the corridors of their small castle, body moving him toward the one room he called his. There was nothing for it.
He'd made "dinner reservations". Truly the most disconcerting event of the week.
"We're going out tonight," he said with no preamble when he finally came upon Merlin.
Merlin gaped, forgetting the speech/rant he'd planned about Arthur needing to warn him when he'd be gone that long, or Merlin would be forced to assume he was lying bloodied on a street again somewhere. "We're doing what now?"
"We," Arthur gestured between the two of them, "are going to dine out."
"Em," Merlin blinked. "Okay. Mind if I ask why?"
"Yes, as a matter of fact I do. I'm not going to have to order you to eat with me, am I?" Arthur arched a brow expectantly, giving in to Daisy's restless jumping in front of him. He crouched down and scratched between the puppies ears, but his eyes never left Merlin's face. "Well?"
"Well" yourself, Merlin thought. Honestly, Arthur had to know that looking up at him like that, his eyes quite matched the pleading shininess of the puppy's he was petting. "Alright," he answered. "Sure. Em... when?"
"Idiot," Arthur scoffed and made to stand, tucking Daisy under his arm. "Five o'clock, which gives you two hours to bathe."
Merlin crossed his arms. "What makes you think I need two hours to bathe? And-- wait-- am I supposed to be getting dressed up or something?"
"No, but you smell like you've been rolling around outside with the dog all day."
To which, Merlin only grinned sheepishly. He couldn't exactly deny that, after all. "Well then. I will see you at five."
That drew Arthur up short and he huffed a sharp, "Right."
~*~
Two hours later, Merlin was standing in front of the mirror, hair still damp, wondering if he looked alright in the tan colored pants and red shirt with buttons down the front. This whole modern clothing thing still baffled him a bit. Back in his time, he'd only owned three outfits, plus one to sleep in, and those were chosen completely for comfort and convenience. Dressing to look good wasn't something he fully understood. But right now, he wanted to.
"Are you ready yet?" Arthur asked, pushing open the door and leaning against the frame.
Merlin turned around and blinked. Arthur, apparently, had no trouble picking nice attire. Then again, he'd had to dress to look good his entire life.
Not that Merlin thought it would be possible for him to look anything but good, no matter what he wore.
He gave a quick nod. "Yeah. I'm ready."
"For God's sake," Arthur grumbled, crossing the room to Merlin's side. He undid the top few buttons and fixed them in proper order, untucking the collar of the shirt. His hands lingered on Merlin's shoulders as he brought his gaze to the other boy's face. "It's no wonder all your clothing are rags."
Merlin rolled his eyes as Arthur tended to his shirt. "You know Sire, you did trust me to dress you nearly every day back home. Apparently you found me competent enough then."
Then he noticed Arthur's eyes on him, and ducked his head, blushing. "Shouldn't we be going? The em... restaurant... is expecting us."
"Yes, that is quite the puzzle, isn't it?" Arthur eyed Merlin up and down, assessing the damage and determining he looked fine. "We have time." He tilted his chin in consideration, leaning forward until his lips brushed the curve of Merlin's ear. "I want you to dress like this more often."
Merlin just about turned the colour of his shirt, and shivered inside and possibly out as well. "I can do that," he answered, slightly muffled once he'd dropped his face to Arthur's shoulder.
"Of course you can, I ordered you to." Arthur smirked, letting his lips drag across Merlin's cheek and then pulled away. "Now that you look halfway decent, we should go."
"Right," Merlin agreed, attempting to get his bearings. He coughed and ducked his head again, then grinned crookedly. "After you, Sire."
Shaking his head, Arthur pushed the door open the whole way. "Ladies first."
Merlin raised his eyebrows and stepped aside. "No, no. I insist. Age before beauty, after all."
"I'm not quite sure I know how old you are, Merlin." Just because they had discovered the idiot's birthday, didn't mean they knew that. Arthur folded his arms across his chest and then made a sweeping gesture toward the door.
"Fine," Merlin finally relented, going through the door and the turning to reach for Arthur's wrist, tugging him along. "Anyway, I'm twenty. I'm nearly certain of it."
"Oh, he thinks he's twenty, does he?"
Arthur allowed himself to be dragged out of the bedroom and down the hall before he forced Merlin to slow. What Merlin didn't know, wouldn't hurt him, after all. Arthur had set reservations, as the giggling girl behind the odd table had told him, but she'd added that there were very few for that evening and they could be quite a few minutes late and receive a table.
Arthur was counting on that promise to hold.
Merlin raised his eyebrows and turned to look back at Arthur. "Why are we stopping? Is the back of my shirt wrinkled or something?"
"We aren't stopping, Merlin." Arthur fell into step beside Merlin, freeing his arm from the tight hold.
"But you--" slowed down, Merlin was about to say. Then he realized they were indeed still walking, but Arthur was close to his side now. Ah. He cleared his throat. "So then... where are we going, exactly?"
Arthur smirked and grasped Merlin's hand. Flustering Merlin came so easily to him sometimes, and it never failed to make Arthur's day just that much brighter. An off-balance Merlin was a predictable one. "Don't you enjoy surprises?"
Merlin glared down at that hand suspiciously, but didn't let go. "I suppose I do," he answered slowly. "It's just that a 'surprise' from you usually involves an extended hunting trip or a special round of moving target practice with Merlin as the target."
"Come on, you know that's just a bit of fun. Harmless." Arthur valiantly kept a straight face. "Would I ever make you dress up this nicely just to watch you ruin it in the mud?"
"Absolutely," Merlin answered without missing a beat. "It would only make it that much more fun for you."
"You're probably right. However, I'm unarmed. One would think that would be hint enough."
Deciding this was sufficient enough (for now), Merlin nodded and laced his fingers through Arthur's. "Fine. But if this turns out to be anything prattish, I will make sure you don't see Daisy for a week."
Arthur scoffed and pushed open the heavy outer doors of the castle, leading to a mild spring night. Arthur took a sharp breath of fresh air and hummed. Merlin needed to work on his threats. He couldn't honestly believe that was threatening. "Seeing how her bed is in my room, you can hardly call that a threat."
Hmph. He had a point. "I will put an invisibility charm on her so that only I can see her," he amended, smirking. "But you don't have to worry about it, do you? Because this is not going to be anything prattish."
"Can a spell be that specialized?" Arthur asked, momentarily frowning. He had seen, for the most part, the extent of Merlin's powers, he had read all the library had to offer on their particular variations of what Merlin may one day know, but not once did any of the tales mention anything as specific as that.
It sounded absurd.
Which was highly odd.
"Of course not. You need to learn to trust me, Merlin."
Mostly, Merlin had been kidding about the invisibility spell. Now, he tilted his head to think about it. "Huh... you know... I have no idea," he admitted with a small grin. "Probably. But I don't know how yet." Then he used their linked hands to tug himself closer and nudge Arthur's shoulder. "And I do trust you."
"You had better," Arthur muttered, leading Merlin out of the park and onto the curb.
Merlin followed, furrowing his brow. Arthur was treating that last point with a good amount of seriousness. A strange contrast against the usual banter. But maybe Merlin was just reading too much into it. "I've been working on the spell," he said abruptly, mostly to break the silence but also because he did actually want to tell Arthur. "I don't think it will be long now. Before it works the right way."
Arthur didn't dare turn to look at whatever ridiculous expression Merlin was making. The entire tone of their conversation had become tainted, and Arthur was man enough to admit that it was partially his fault.
"You won't be experimenting with it on me again."
Merlin snorted, seeing no reason why the mood couldn't be lifted again. "Isn't trust supposed to work both ways, Sire?"
"I trust you. Your magic is quite a different thing entirely. Especially after that flying spell."
Grinning brightly, Merlin clutched Arthur's hand tighter and muttered the words before Arthur would even realize he had. They were only floating several inches, and for only enough time for Merlin to quip, "This one, you mean?" before he brought them down again, snickering.
Arthur took his time to settle his startled breathing before soundly smacking the back of Merlin's head.
"Yes. That one."
Even as he rubbed the sore spot on his head, Merlin continued to laugh. "I just thought it would help us get there faster. Are you sure you don't want me to continue?" Merlin spent so much time worrying about Arthur in life-or-death situations, he had only now realized how amusing it was to see the prince so fearful of something Merlin knew wouldn't hurt him.
"We're walking."
Merlin just smiled wider, and moved closer to Arthur's side.
~*~
Arthur's stomach was doing the oddest thing. It was fluttering like there was a small bird caught in the dead center and doing aerial somersaults to some frantic tune that Arthur's body couldn't keep up with. He pushed open the door to the eatery and gestured for Merlin to enter before him.
Merlin glanced at Arthur for a moment. He almost said something about the disturbingly hospitable gesture, but there was something about Arthur's expression that made him hold his tongue. Calling it nervousness seemed a bit hard to believe, and yet, that was what it looked like. Merlin managed a smile that he hoped looked appreciative or maybe reassuring, and stepped through the door.
"It's nice," he commented slightly under his breath, eyes wandering over the elegantly adorned room. And it was. Probably the nicest, most lavish place he'd seen since leaving Camelot.
Merlin's eyes were really too big for his face. Arthur's bird friend seemed to be banging its head under his ribcage relentlessly. He eyed the woman behind the podium, and she hurried to lead them to one of the free tables.
He smiled tightly at her comment about enjoying themselves as he sank down onto one of the chairs.
Merlin still didn't really have this restaurant situation down fully. Since arriving here, he'd been to one or two. But not one like this, and the concept of a menu still baffled him. Having so many choices for something to eat... and then telling someone to go and make it for you? It wasn't the life of a farmer, or a manservant. Still, he let his eyes skim down the page, trying to decide what looked most appetizing.
He thought maybe he should say something, so for a moment, he glanced up from the menu and across the table at Arthur. Something gave a somersault in his chest as his eyes swept over the well-defined face, and he quickly looked back down. Suddenly, he had absolutely nothing to say. Suddenly, he wondered if he was in way over his head here.
Merlin wasn't very subtle. Arthur would have thought by now there would have been some improvement in that area. The bird was settling, hopefully for good, because he would look foolish sitting there and eating nothing.
"What is it?" he asked, resigned to the insufficient explanation he was sure to get.
"Nothing," Merlin answered quickly, eyes flickering up and down again. It was the truth, honestly. The whole problem was not knowing what to say, after all. "Do you know what you're having to eat?"
"Steak." Arthur didn't even look down at the list before him. "You're lying."
Merlin rolled his eyes, knowing Arthur wouldn't be appeased until he confessed whatever 'deep dark secret' he was convinced Merlin was hiding. "I supposed I'm just... overwhelmed," he said, realizing this was just as much the truth as his first answer.
Sighing heavily, Arthur cast aside his menu and folded his hands on the table. Merlin being overwhelmed came as no shock to Arthur. Truth be told, Arthur couldn't say he was unaffected as well. This was veering dangerously toward courtship. Something for girls. And despite what he liked to say, Merlin was not a girl.
"Do you want to stay here?"
"Here, in the restaurant?" Merlin asked, closing his own menu and settling an only-slightly wavering gaze on Arthur. "Yes, of course. I like it," he half-smiled. "Really. It's just... em... you know."
"Overwhelming?" Arthur's lips quirked into a half smile. Merlin's reaction wasn't the one he had hoped for. Though, what he hoped for remained elusive. One thing Arthur knew with a great deal of certainty that if Merlin remained wound tight, Arthur would remain on edge and this would prove to be the most tedious evening he had endured since arriving here.
Heart fluttering at Arthur's understanding smile, Merlin laughed. "Right. That." He took a breath, wondering if it was only his imagination that Arthur didn't seem totally at ease either. He decided it probably wasn't, and hesitantly reached across the table and laid a hand on Arthur's folded ones. "Really, though. I'm glad we're doing this. Thank you."
"I have to admit," Arthur began, letting out a breath he hadn't been aware he'd kept trapped inside, "This could be going a good deal worse."
He gazed at his covered hands and smirked, catching Merlin's wrist. "Are you even hungry?"
That was extremely close to a compliment. Merlin looked smilingly at Arthur and swiped a thumb along Arthur's fingers, starting to feel more relaxed. He was hungry, or would be more so if his stomach didn't feel like it was home to a nest of hyperactive owls. In a good way, he was pretty sure. But they were starting to calm down a little. "Yes. Why, aren't you?"
~*~
Arthur drowsily led Merlin back from the restaurant to the park, stomach satisfied and brain fuzzed from wine. The night had been, dare he say it, nice, and he didn't want to jeopardize it. So he didn't speak, in the hopes Merlin would follow his cue and say nothing either. With the fresh, night air clearing his senses, Arthur realized that was logically impossible and resigned himself to being chattered at to fill the silence.
It's not like Merlin could really help it. He just liked to talk. He talked when he was happy, or nervous, or distressed, and right now, he was two out of those three. He wasn't even sure what he was saying anymore. But the night was nice, and the air was nice, and the dinner had been nice and so had the wine, so really, what he was saying probably didn't matter. Then he saw their castle a few paces away, and actually comprehended himself saying, "Em, well-- this was-- fun."
"You are the worst drunk I've ever had the displeasure of hanging about with in the history of the entire world," Arthur grumbled, waving his hand until it fell against the back of Merlin's head and slid down to his neck. "Quite truly the worst."
Merlin made a noise that was somewhat akin to an insulted gasp, but turned into a laugh along the way. "I'm not drunk!" he protested. "Just-- fuzzy. A little. Not drunk."
"Fuzzy?" Arthur's lips quirked into an easy smirk and he ruffled the back of Merlin's hair.
Which kind of made Merlin giggle a little, and then blush because he'd giggled. He covered his mouth with his hand, then his whole face instead. "Definitely not drunk," came the slightly muffled comment from behind his palm.
"No, of course you aren't." Arthur wound his arm around Merlin's shoulders and drew him close, for safety and speed's sake. If Merlin fell over now, well, Arthur could manage carrying him, but it wasn't exactly his idea of a fun time. "It takes a great deal more alcohol to make you unsteady," he continued loftily.
Whatever Arthur's reason might have been for the gesture, Merlin wasn't wasting it. He nuzzled close and laughed. "A great deal more," he agreed, nodding. They made their way into the castle. Not wanting to wake anyone who might be sleeping-- especially not Uther, who really, really shouldn't see them like this-- Merlin spoke quietly. "Anyway, thank you for tonight." He was pretty sure somewhere earlier in the evening, he'd said that already. Maybe a few times. But he meant it enough to say it again. Whatever had possessed Arthur to plan this, Merlin was glad for it.
Arthur nodded. Heat coiled low in his stomach as Merlin's nose buried against his neck and prickles crept down his back. He tightened his hold a fraction, whether in warning or encouragement. Alcohol made these things more confusing. He hadn't nearly consumed as much as he would have wished to, given the circumstances, but the amount he'd had was substantial in it's own right.
The drinks here were sweeter, but no less potent.
"Come on, let's get back to the room."
For some reason, a small hoard of butterflies went zipping through Merlin's heart and stomach. "Kay," he agreed. Still tucked into Arthur's side, he stepped off down the hall, wondering if the heavy, prickling feeling hanging around them was only his imagination, or because of the wine. At the same time, Merlin was sure the effects of the wine were beginning to ebb away, losing out to the unexplainable idea that something was about to happen, something big that made his heart pound. "After you, Sire," he said in an unintentionally low voice when they reached the bedroom door.
A few seconds passed when Arthur simply stood there eying the inside of Merlin's ear, unfortunately the only bit he could eye, before determining Merlin was, in fact, drunker than he imagined. He pushed open the door and dragged Merlin in through it before shutting it with a loud thunk.
The movement came as a bit of a surprise, and Merlin inhaled sharply, eyes widening as he lifted them and turned his face to look at Arthur. The look he saw there was one he was pretty sure he wasn't familiar with. But he was pretty sure he didn't want it to go away. Merlin shivered lightly. The fog in his mind might have started to clear a little, but it didn't make him any more certain of what to do. "Arthur...?" he tried, voice catching.
Merlin shuddered under Arthur's hand. Silence spread tight and heavy in the room following Merlin's inquiry. Arthur didn't know what was wrong with him.
And there had to be something unerringly wrong.
He dragged his thumb in loose circles over Merlin's shoulders, focusing on the movement over the sound of blood whooshing in his ears. The feeling only came before a fight. Usually a challenging one at that, but Merlin wasn't a fighter. Morgana insisted he was a "lover" and the word tasted odd on his tongue even though he'd never repeated it.
"Hm? What is it?"
"I... I don't know," was Merlin's best answer, and it came with a small, nervous laugh. Holding Arthur's gaze made the feeling in his stomach intensify to the point of bursting, so he shot his eyes toward his feet. He brought an ever-so-slightly trembling hand to his shoulder, to rest atop Arthur's. "I'm em... not really sure what to do here." The admittance came quietly, and with it was the acknowledgment that there was definitely something he thought might be happening. Something more than just saying good night, and going to sleep.
"Thankfully, we've never expected you to think, have we?" Though, Arthur thought with grim determination, he had no better clue what would occur next than Merlin did.
The jibe made Merlin feel slightly more comfortable, though not much. He laughed again, though, and decided maybe they should at least sit down. Gripping Arthur's hand, he led them toward the bed and took a seat, tugging Arthur down beside him. "M-maybe we should just... turn in for the night."
"Merlin." Arthur sat alongside Merlin and found himself reaching for the idiot's face. There was something about him that left Arthur stuck fast in place. There always had been. His fingers grazed the side of Merlin's chin as Arthur considered him. "What do you want?"
Flushed, Merlin leaned into Arthur's hand and shut his eyes. He was feeling so much, all at once, it was like he was drowning. But then, so much of what he was feeling was... was good, and maybe he didn't want to come up for air.
But he was confused, and uncertain... and maybe the slightest bit terrified, and his heart wasn't going to stay in his chest much longer if it kept on pounding in the manner it was. Merlin didn't know how to answer Arthur's question, so he did the only thing he could think of. He closed the distance, and kissed him.
This, at least, made sense to him. This, he understood. And most importantly, he wouldn't have to talk.
Arthur slid his fingers back into Merlin's hair, gliding over Merlin's too big ears as he moved to cradle his head. Blood pushed against his ear drums as he took what Merlin gave him without question. Too long had he been restraining himself and goddamn he was going to take what he wanted.
Now.
Had Merlin been anyone else, this never would have been a problem. Emotions got tangled and snarled, coiling within his chest in a large lump that made breathing impossibly hard and his heart beat improbably fast to compensate. And it was all Merlin's fault. He curled Merlin's hair around his fingers tugged and pushing until he had Merlin pushed up against the headboard of the bed.
"You never answered my question," he breathed harshly against Merlin's lips. "What do you want from me?"
Arthur's eager reaction startled Merlin, but it was not unwelcome. It made Merlin dizzy and breathless, and somehow that helped him forget the confusion and fear a little. Enough that he could open his eyes, and look into Arthur's, and somehow manage a choked answer. "Arthur, I just... I want... this." He kissed him again, more forceful than usual, hopefully leaving no room for questioning because if he had to explain any further, he was going to start thinking too hard about it again and that would do no good. "You."
Determined to ignore the trembling in his hands, Arthur kissed and sucked his way slowly down Merlin's jaw, over the bump of his chin and down the front of his throat, hovering a moment over Merlin's Adam's apple. His breathing came out heavy and fast, hot as he tried to wrestle his fraying thoughts in order.
But God it was harder than he expected it to be. How long had he been denying them both when he could have had anything he wanted with a simple look? He dusted his lips over the lump in Merlin's throat and resolutely told himself to stop thinking.
When, after all, had it done either of them good?
Maybe there was something to be said for instinct when it came to... this sort of thing. Because as clueless as Merlin was, there was something inside of him that seemed desperate to take over. And really, Merlin was only all too eager to let it. He gasped softly and slid his fingers into Arthur's hair, dragging them along his scalp and pressing down, encouraging Arthur to continue. God, Arthur had to continue.
At this point, Merlin couldn't stop to think if he tried. His mind was in a thousand places, and yet somehow, only one clear image broke through the haze. Arthur... Arthur and Arthur's lips and hands and breath and body and... and Merlin felt a fire spreading inside him that he'd never experienced and had no name for.
He wasn't quite sure when it happened, but somehow in one of his brief moments of awareness, he noticed that he'd pulled Arthur back up and that his fingers were fumbling with the buttons of his shirt.
Batting away Merlin's fingers, Arthur merely shrugged the shirt off over his head and tossed it aside without caring where it landed. He gazed down upon Merlin's face and bit back the groan that threatened to escape him. Arthur nuzzled the bare skin at the dip between Merlin's shoulder and neck, mouthing a kiss to the stretch of skin, before pulling back.
How far would be too far, he wondered, tugging on the collar of Merlin's shirt in a silent command to remove it.
For a moment, Merlin froze again. Which was ridiculous. Because really, it wasn't as though he'd never seen Arthur without a shirt on before. But then again, he knew this was very, very different from any of those times. So he let himself stare. Only for a moment though, before he realized what Arthur wanted, and somehow managed to catch his breath long enough to rid himself of his own shirt.
He looked up at Arthur again, unsure of what exactly he was waiting for.
Arthur's eyes roamed over the pale expanse of flesh presented to him and found himself wanting to push Merlin into the sunlight to get some color into his skin. His fingers moved in silent sweeps over Merlin's scrawny chest, amazed and unnerved by how easy it was to feel ribs beneath the skin. On anyone else it would be off-putting, on Merlin it only made too much sense. Arthur dragged his finger down Merlin's sternum and paused with a thoughtful hum.
Merlin was too nervous for this. So, he proceeded to assault Merlin's mouth to the best extent of his skills.
It was a wonder Merlin hadn't passed out yet, with how quick and short his breaths became while Arthur's fingers traveled. Then he couldn't breathe at all, since Arthur was suddenly kissing him again. It was less of a decision and more of a reflex when Merlin finally just... let go. Why was he so nervous, anyway? Really... it was only Arthur. He'd put his life in Arthur's hands time and time again, and trusted him with it. He loved Arthur. And maybe it had taken a little too long, but he could see now that even if Arthur had more trouble than he did saying it aloud, it didn't mean he hadn't made it clear.
Nerves forgotten, ignoring that he had no idea what he was doing, Merlin pulled Arthur down and let the instinct take over.
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EPIC-FADEOUT-OF-VANILLA!DANI-PROPORTIONS
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