(no subject)
a good buddy and co-worker gave his notice a little while ago at our school program. he works with one of the youth in evening program who happens to be trans. this kid doesn't have much of a support system in general, let a alone a support system in his transition. he's gotten pretty close to my buddy and i know he's going to miss him when he leaves.
tonight after work, a few of us, including my buddy from work, went out for dinner. afterward everyone took off and my buddy and i stuck around and chatted. he was telling me about the boy and how he's got lots of concerns and feels alone, etc. my buddy asked me to check in on him, talk to him. (a few months back, i met this boy and gave him a bunch of trans resources and info about surgeries, etc). my buddy said that whenever they talk about stuff regarding transition, my name always comes up. my buddy says he looks up to me and has a sense of "if he can do it, i can do it", a sort of optimism. i've been feeling a little lost in regards to work lately, unsure if youth work is where i wanna be, unsure if i'm really where i should be right now. hearing my buddy says these things gave me a feeling of ease, like the refresh button has been pressed in my life, like i am where i should be, my work is laid out for me. i really want to help this kid. i don't know what kind of superhero moves i can make...but i'll sit with him, listen to him, talk with him. i feel like i have little epiphanies all the time. and i feel like just when i start to doubt myself, i impress myself.
it also meant a lot to me that this buddy, who didn't know about me when we first met still really likes and respects me. not that i thought he'd hate me, but i always have a bit of weariness when people who didn't know before, find out. plus, the way he found out about it made me smile. after i met the boy who's trans, he apparently went to school the next day, excitedly went up to my buddy and told him about how much of a help i was and how cool it was to meet me, etc etc.
it's really easy to assume that because i'm only one guy, i'm just living my life, trying to be a good person, how much of an effect could i really have on someone? it's amazing when you learn that you're bigger than you think, your life and your experience have value and even one conversation can really positively impact someone.
tonight after work, a few of us, including my buddy from work, went out for dinner. afterward everyone took off and my buddy and i stuck around and chatted. he was telling me about the boy and how he's got lots of concerns and feels alone, etc. my buddy asked me to check in on him, talk to him. (a few months back, i met this boy and gave him a bunch of trans resources and info about surgeries, etc). my buddy said that whenever they talk about stuff regarding transition, my name always comes up. my buddy says he looks up to me and has a sense of "if he can do it, i can do it", a sort of optimism. i've been feeling a little lost in regards to work lately, unsure if youth work is where i wanna be, unsure if i'm really where i should be right now. hearing my buddy says these things gave me a feeling of ease, like the refresh button has been pressed in my life, like i am where i should be, my work is laid out for me. i really want to help this kid. i don't know what kind of superhero moves i can make...but i'll sit with him, listen to him, talk with him. i feel like i have little epiphanies all the time. and i feel like just when i start to doubt myself, i impress myself.
it also meant a lot to me that this buddy, who didn't know about me when we first met still really likes and respects me. not that i thought he'd hate me, but i always have a bit of weariness when people who didn't know before, find out. plus, the way he found out about it made me smile. after i met the boy who's trans, he apparently went to school the next day, excitedly went up to my buddy and told him about how much of a help i was and how cool it was to meet me, etc etc.
it's really easy to assume that because i'm only one guy, i'm just living my life, trying to be a good person, how much of an effect could i really have on someone? it's amazing when you learn that you're bigger than you think, your life and your experience have value and even one conversation can really positively impact someone.