Everyone Goes Through It. I Think.
Everyone goes through it. I think. I’ve been struggling with allergies and sleeping and it’s getting to me mentally. There’s a crack in my façade and I can’t seem to find my spackle. Trying to fill it up with food, obviously that doesn’t work. What’s up?
I feel “not smart enough”. I like to surround myself with smart people, those who are smart on all sorts of different topics. I don’t like to debate, but I like to learn. However, lately I’ve been feeling dumb. It’s not that I can’t perform my job or exceed those goals, it’s that I just feel stupid all around.
So I say to myself, “self, you need to be smarter!” yet I’m not one to study or go out of my way to learn. If you know what I mean. Well, I can spell it out for you: I’m lazy. I’m lazy but I want to be smart. I know things like knowledge aren’t going to fall into my lap yet I sit here at work wondering when I’ll learn something new. Or have an answer to someone’s question. Or be able to talk with authority on a subject that’s not work related .I’ve got that covered.
I fully admit I’m just average, yet some of the stunts reported in the media honestly make me feel like a genius. Then again when I do educate myself about a topic I don’t necessarily follow through. I’ve been seeing this with my eating lately. A smart person (if that were me) would avoid cheese and other things that make them sick and just move on. This is where my smarts don’t kick in with just a food example. There are still many more “smarts” that aren’t clicking in the food/fuel sphere, never mind all the other things in my life.
While I want to be smart, I want to actually learn AND apply those smarts.
Originally published at Killer Bunnies, Inc. Please leave any comments there.