Sometimes I wonder...
Some times I wonder what my life would be like if I made different decisions. What career would I be pursuing? What friends would I have? Would my "interests" be different? There are so many changes I've gone through that have brought me here.
Sometimes I wonder what my life would be like had I never stopped dancing. I would've never gained all the weight that I did. I wouldn't have been in horizons. I would've finished farther behind in school. I would have never joined band, never sang in choir. If I had taken my dancing career seriously, then maybe I wouldn't be lost in an endless struggle to find a major that suits me with a job that that drains me.
Sometimes I wonder where I would be if I had studied ninjitsu to its fullest. Would I have my own dojo? Would I build my own family or move and become acclimated with Kogakaiden.
Sometimes I wonder how I would be if I hadn't lost all my weight. Would I be so narcissistic? Would I still constantly worry about my health, about whats wrong with me? I would at least know what it is that pushes people away.
Sometimes I wish I could turn back time and change so much of my life. These aren't really regrets, because I have enjoyed every one of my experiences. Each encounter, each life I have gone through has given me insight to the world I live in now. And even though the past can't be rewritten, my future is still a blank canvas ready to explode with color and life. I just wish I could start over.
Sometimes I wonder what my life would be like had I never stopped dancing. I would've never gained all the weight that I did. I wouldn't have been in horizons. I would've finished farther behind in school. I would have never joined band, never sang in choir. If I had taken my dancing career seriously, then maybe I wouldn't be lost in an endless struggle to find a major that suits me with a job that that drains me.
Sometimes I wonder where I would be if I had studied ninjitsu to its fullest. Would I have my own dojo? Would I build my own family or move and become acclimated with Kogakaiden.
Sometimes I wonder how I would be if I hadn't lost all my weight. Would I be so narcissistic? Would I still constantly worry about my health, about whats wrong with me? I would at least know what it is that pushes people away.
Sometimes I wish I could turn back time and change so much of my life. These aren't really regrets, because I have enjoyed every one of my experiences. Each encounter, each life I have gone through has given me insight to the world I live in now. And even though the past can't be rewritten, my future is still a blank canvas ready to explode with color and life. I just wish I could start over.