july resolution
I realized that in the past few months (a year really) I've been almost without writing. My life has been so busy that I'm not sure that I can slow down enough to write something/anything. My sleep patterns are as awful as my eating habits--either too much or not enough. Money flies out of my hands for gas driving to and from Athens. There's always a reason to go, and never a reason to stay. Words become shorter than thoughts and I've already forgotten what that means.
My expectations yield disappointments, and how I wish they didn't. I'd be less cryptic if it would be less offensive.
On the other hand, when I'm in a better mood, I have no problem neglecting hunger, disappointments, low expectations, and so on. I'm happy then--which is most of the time. I probably feel like shit now because I'm hung over and I just want these eight days to pass me by.
My summer is like the air conditioning I'm not used to still. It's numbingly cold inside and too hot to breathe on the outside. I get more done when I'm numb, and complain more when I'm hot.
Yeah, I'm good; I'm just in that transition phase in between not seeing David in a long time and the realization that he's coming home. Will he recognize me? Will I recognize him? I always ask myself that after each parting. It's always fine by the second day, except the time when it wasn't and he almost left.
While he's been gone (or while I've been gone is probably more accurate), I've been struggling with the questions: are standards higher for me because I'm a girl or lower because I'm a girl? I think it depends on the situation, but I do rarely think that standards are the same. I can come to terms with that, but not with the notion that I don't think that the standards should be the same. Does that sound anti-feminist of me? Is it counterproductive even to consider this? Probably.
And what about the news? I'm excited about the election (God, it's so far away still). I have no idea really who I want to vote for (or, sorry, I have no idea for whom I want to vote, but that sounds awkward). I'm not even sure what I am looking for in a candidate. If you ask me a question like, do you prefer big or small government? I can't really say. It's not that I don't know, but it's more like I think they both work, but I'm more concerned with which person can set a plan in place that will render greatest efficiency. And I'm not only talking about fiscal matters that would result in smaller government: I also mean how can we enact social programmes that would create an equity between the people while keeping the bureaucracy minimal while achieving the greatest possible "equity outputs" (a Laffer curve of equity, if I may)? See, I say this and I feel like I'm talking more about how the EU should improve itself rather than what the US should do. I don't know how I feel about American politics. I try to care, but I end up being too concerned about social programs. I haven't studied American politics enough to equate in defense spending (I'm not opposed to this, I just don't know what to say). Or something.
My expectations yield disappointments, and how I wish they didn't. I'd be less cryptic if it would be less offensive.
On the other hand, when I'm in a better mood, I have no problem neglecting hunger, disappointments, low expectations, and so on. I'm happy then--which is most of the time. I probably feel like shit now because I'm hung over and I just want these eight days to pass me by.
My summer is like the air conditioning I'm not used to still. It's numbingly cold inside and too hot to breathe on the outside. I get more done when I'm numb, and complain more when I'm hot.
Yeah, I'm good; I'm just in that transition phase in between not seeing David in a long time and the realization that he's coming home. Will he recognize me? Will I recognize him? I always ask myself that after each parting. It's always fine by the second day, except the time when it wasn't and he almost left.
While he's been gone (or while I've been gone is probably more accurate), I've been struggling with the questions: are standards higher for me because I'm a girl or lower because I'm a girl? I think it depends on the situation, but I do rarely think that standards are the same. I can come to terms with that, but not with the notion that I don't think that the standards should be the same. Does that sound anti-feminist of me? Is it counterproductive even to consider this? Probably.
And what about the news? I'm excited about the election (God, it's so far away still). I have no idea really who I want to vote for (or, sorry, I have no idea for whom I want to vote, but that sounds awkward). I'm not even sure what I am looking for in a candidate. If you ask me a question like, do you prefer big or small government? I can't really say. It's not that I don't know, but it's more like I think they both work, but I'm more concerned with which person can set a plan in place that will render greatest efficiency. And I'm not only talking about fiscal matters that would result in smaller government: I also mean how can we enact social programmes that would create an equity between the people while keeping the bureaucracy minimal while achieving the greatest possible "equity outputs" (a Laffer curve of equity, if I may)? See, I say this and I feel like I'm talking more about how the EU should improve itself rather than what the US should do. I don't know how I feel about American politics. I try to care, but I end up being too concerned about social programs. I haven't studied American politics enough to equate in defense spending (I'm not opposed to this, I just don't know what to say). Or something.