(no subject)
as i've already recognized about myself-
i'm a horrible time-manager.
i think i can do everything.. so i try..
then i end up being cluttered & overscheduled
& have no time to relax or sleep
because i have a compulsive need to make things perfect.
this stresses me out so much- so some days i oversleep & watch tv
& procrastinate to unhealthy, unsuccessful levels.
this type of laziness makes me sad
so i schedule more events & programs & classes.
and so continues the cycle.
& in this personal little bubble of self destruction
i leave no time to friends or family-
just the occasional weekend, where my focus is work anyway.
i can't explain how much i miss certain people.
a boy that won't talk to me.
a sister that frequently hates me.
a brother that i talk to maybe once a week, if i'm lucky.
parents that i worry about constantly.
extended family thats having major health problems.
i honestly don't see a way out.
why is life this hard?
i'm a horrible time-manager.
i think i can do everything.. so i try..
then i end up being cluttered & overscheduled
& have no time to relax or sleep
because i have a compulsive need to make things perfect.
this stresses me out so much- so some days i oversleep & watch tv
& procrastinate to unhealthy, unsuccessful levels.
this type of laziness makes me sad
so i schedule more events & programs & classes.
and so continues the cycle.
& in this personal little bubble of self destruction
i leave no time to friends or family-
just the occasional weekend, where my focus is work anyway.
i can't explain how much i miss certain people.
a boy that won't talk to me.
a sister that frequently hates me.
a brother that i talk to maybe once a week, if i'm lucky.
parents that i worry about constantly.
extended family thats having major health problems.
i honestly don't see a way out.
why is life this hard?