the only gift i wanted is her.
well. it was wierd. it wasn't bad. it was different. missing. santa was late. haha that was funny, kinna sad. but i'd be late too...i mean, we're older now. maggies santa gifts were put out, ready for her. no one had a stocking. and it didn't look or smell like christmas like it used to. just missing.
there was no one to jump on top of in bed to wake up and cuddle. and ask if we could open presents yet and she would tell me "wake me up at 6:30..go play with what santa got you" *kiss* then i'd play and watch the clock untill 6:30 but give her an extra 10 minutes just to be nice...then i'd make her some hot cocoa...maybe make some breakfast that she'd pretend to like. and i'd show her all the cool stuff santa brought. and shed open her presents all slow...and sweet...acting surprised, even tho she knew what she got. and we'd always forgot about the stockings hanging over the tv. we were so happy. just us. and no one else. we were each others only. each others best friends. then we'd head to grandmas house. for more gifts. and we'd open the door and the smell of a grandmas house...music playing in the background. libby already in her presents. "ready?" "yeah!" and we'd all go into the other room and sort out the gifts...the room would be such a mess afterwards hah...
not seeing her name on any presents was...
wasn't right.
i sit here and wonder when i was talking about...because i don't remember maggie there..or wayne. but they were...but they're not what i remember. i can only remember us. maybe its after their divorce..and maggie wasn't awake yet.yeah.
is it hitting me yet?
i want someone to understand. i want this to get out.i keep holding on to something. the feeling shes comin back.
i hate christmas now. thats kind of sad. it was my favorite. but...its not really christmas without her. its just not.
i'm going to go next door and forget. people need to come over and play with us. now please. :)
i really hope everyone had a nice christmas. because u all rock hard. like for real. i love my friends. i wish ya understood. I FUCKIN LOVE YOU ALL.
omfg, christmas isn't about getting everthing you wanted you selfish fucks. i'm sorry. but damn. and its no one in paticular. things aren't all that matter. god dammit. whats gunna happen when u have everything you want. u'll just want more. ahhh. and maybe you do care about other things besides stuff that you'll throw away in a year or so. people still care about you even if they didn't get you anything!!!! okay...i'm done and cool. and um.. bye *hugs* i don't hate anyone. jus disappointed?
there was no one to jump on top of in bed to wake up and cuddle. and ask if we could open presents yet and she would tell me "wake me up at 6:30..go play with what santa got you" *kiss* then i'd play and watch the clock untill 6:30 but give her an extra 10 minutes just to be nice...then i'd make her some hot cocoa...maybe make some breakfast that she'd pretend to like. and i'd show her all the cool stuff santa brought. and shed open her presents all slow...and sweet...acting surprised, even tho she knew what she got. and we'd always forgot about the stockings hanging over the tv. we were so happy. just us. and no one else. we were each others only. each others best friends. then we'd head to grandmas house. for more gifts. and we'd open the door and the smell of a grandmas house...music playing in the background. libby already in her presents. "ready?" "yeah!" and we'd all go into the other room and sort out the gifts...the room would be such a mess afterwards hah...
not seeing her name on any presents was...
wasn't right.
i sit here and wonder when i was talking about...because i don't remember maggie there..or wayne. but they were...but they're not what i remember. i can only remember us. maybe its after their divorce..and maggie wasn't awake yet.yeah.
is it hitting me yet?
i want someone to understand. i want this to get out.i keep holding on to something. the feeling shes comin back.
i hate christmas now. thats kind of sad. it was my favorite. but...its not really christmas without her. its just not.
i'm going to go next door and forget. people need to come over and play with us. now please. :)
i really hope everyone had a nice christmas. because u all rock hard. like for real. i love my friends. i wish ya understood. I FUCKIN LOVE YOU ALL.
omfg, christmas isn't about getting everthing you wanted you selfish fucks. i'm sorry. but damn. and its no one in paticular. things aren't all that matter. god dammit. whats gunna happen when u have everything you want. u'll just want more. ahhh. and maybe you do care about other things besides stuff that you'll throw away in a year or so. people still care about you even if they didn't get you anything!!!! okay...i'm done and cool. and um.. bye *hugs* i don't hate anyone. jus disappointed?