*Of Draco and MSN...*
OK, yesterday my MSN name was 'Oh, radiator,' said Draco, 'you're so hot...' and celtic_roisin decided for some reason to start our conversation with a note to Draco about it.
From then on our chat turned into a very random RP/convo/argument between our 'characters', which was just so completely weird I thought I had to post it. *huggles celtic_roisin* It's so nice to find someone on the same twisted wavelength as I am...
So, I hereby present to y'all:
celtic_roisin: Oh Draco, you need a quickie...
astra_argentea: No thanks, Mudblood, I'm gay.
celtic_roisin: Goddamn it.
astra_argentea: I know you're disappointed. After all, I AM the single most attractive wizard in the country -- Harry Potter aside, of course.
celtic_roisin: But I love yoooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuu. You loved me last night
astra_argentea: You must be mistaken. I know I had a lot to drink, but a Mudblood whore...a FEMALE Mudblood whore? I don't think so
celtic_roisin: *glares* You bitch.
astra_argentea: Me? I'M a bitch? Excuse me for having standards. Malfoys don't just jump in bed with the first slut they meet, you know.
celtic_roisin: Excuse me, but last night you said I was the best you'd ever had....you lying scum.
astra_argentea: Again I assure you that it wasn't me you were with last night.
celtic_roisin: Uh-hum. You seem to clearly remember the radiator...Nw try to remember what was on TOP of the radiator.
astra_argentea: A naked, sweaty Harry Potter. My BOYFRIEND. *glares*
celtic_roisin: *cough* Or so you think *waves polyjuice in front of your face*
astra_argentea: *gasps* No...you didn't...
celtic_roisin: *smirks*
astra_argentea: You...you SLUT! You WHORE! You...you fucking COCKTEASE! ^_~ I can't believe you did that to me!
celtic_roisin: You can fucking talk. I had to pay you back somehow... you dumped me for...HIM!!! A fucking POOF, for God's sake.
astra_argentea: It's obvious you just can't handle that I went off with a poof because I AM ONE!
celtic_roisin: YOU ARE NOT!!! YOU ARE A FUCKING SLYTHERIN! YOU CAN'T BE!
astra_argentea: Half the bloody house are gay! How else would we get our reputation as the school sex gods?!
celtic_roisin: *scowls* Because of people like me...I taught you everything...or was that your fucking Mother, eh? *smirk*
celtic_roisin: Ah, look at the little Malfoy now. He can't even speak, is that right. God, you should be in Hufflepuff.
astra_argentea: Hufflepuff? *dies* It so happens I was talking to your cousin, Mudblood. He's much nicer than you are.
And it was my father, actually, but thanks for asking. ^_~
celtic_roisin: You keep your cock-teasing hands AWAY from my cousin, you bitch. He doesn't need to be fucked senseless by the likes of you...He's no fucking poof...
astra_argentea: He sure as hell acts like one. *smirk*
celtic_roisin: He does not, you fucking dickhead *bitch-slaps you*
astra_argentea: Excuse me, but I think I know a gay man when I see one, thank you very much. Besides, even the straight ones find me attractive...
celtic_roisin: You shut up, you prick. Or else *waves polyjuice at you again*
astra_argentea: I won't fall for it this time, bitch.
astra_argentea: *blinks* How did you get into our house, anyway?
celtic_roisin: *smirks* You fall for everything with a cock. You can't help yourself, can you? Get a fucking clue, whore.
astra_argentea: I'M a whore? ME? I'm not the one who snuck into my house and pretended to be Harry fucking Potter in order to get a shag! You're fucking desperate! Although I can understand your fixation with me. I mean, I AM gorgeous...
celtic_roisin: Fuck off. Mr high-and-mighty, you like like you've been dunked inot a vat of bleach. Hello, look at that hideous lump you call a face. You think that THAT is gorgeous? You need fucking glasses.
astra_argentea: BLEACH? BLEACH??!?!?!?!?! HOW DARE YOU ACCUSE ME OF BLEACHING MY HAIR?!?!?!? I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW I'M A NATURAL BLOND, UNLIKE YOU!!!!!!!!!!11oneoneoneeleven
celtic_roisin: You didn't seem to mind it last night now, did you.
celtic_roisin: In fact, you couldn't get enough of it. You wanted me, and you told me...you remember? Of course not. You are a POOF, of course. You don't remember stuff like that. Fucking Malfoys. Lying cunts, the lot of you.
astra_argentea: I wanted HARRY! Harry's my BOYFRIEND! I remember telling HIM that, you deceitful bitch: I don't think you're in any position to call ME a lying cunt!
celtic_roisin: *sweet smile* I didn't lie, I just didn't tell. But you never questioned me, did you?
celtic_roisin: If yuo know him so well, then how didn't you guess it was me, eh?
astra_argentea: I have sex with Harry regularly enough to see absolutely nothing wrong with shagging him... except, of course, that it was YOU! What kind of dirty fetishes do you have, polyjuicing yourself into a guy? Don't tell me you didn't get off on it, because I was there...
And he'd been out all morning, how was I to know you weren't him? It's not like I love him or anything. *blush*
celtic_roisin: You disgust me...You LOVE him?! You make me sick...and hello, it was a bit hard to get off, seeing as you were trying to fuck me senseless in the process.
astra_argentea: Isn't the point that you wanted to be fucked senseless by me? *raises eyebrow* And I said I DIDN'T love him, idiot, learn to read!
celtic_roisin: Learn to control your emotions, you little fuck. And so what if it was.
astra_argentea: Control MY emotions? I didn't use fucking Polyjuice to get my love interest into bed! How long were you planning this, anyway? That potion isn't exactly quick-brewing! And how did you get any of his hair? *glares* I'm beginning to consider getting a restraining order against you...
celtic_roisin: Oh, so now you want a bed involved as well as a radiator...well, that could be arranged *smirk*
astra_argentea: *smirks* I thought I was no good? I mean, piss off! I still have to think of what to tell Harry...he has to believe that I'd never knowingly *glares* cheat on him... *worries*
celtic_roisin: Awww, look who's wowwying about telling his poor wittle Harry-kins..
astra_argentea: He's NOT my wittle Harry-kins! I don't care about him! I just, um, don't want to jeopardise my reputation as a great lover, that's all... *cough*
celtic_roisin: *pretends to sniff* Well, I'll let you get on and tell your precious little man, shall I? And, for the books, you aren't that good *smirk*
astra_argentea: Ask the REAL Harry. He's had me more ways than you can count. ^_~
celtic_roisin: *walks off* I'd rather not.
Notes: 'You loved me last night' is something celtic_roisin actually said to dk_faerie the other day completely innocently. ^_^ And 'slut', 'whore', 'cocktease' is an in-joke about the film 'American Beauty'. Don't ask. ^_^
BTW, that is actually the chat from start to finish. There was the occasional gtg now *hugs* type comment in brackets which I removed, but other than that...no planning, no nothing; just our strange, strange minds at work. *sighs* Got rid of my insane urge to write smut, though.
*SS*
From then on our chat turned into a very random RP/convo/argument between our 'characters', which was just so completely weird I thought I had to post it. *huggles celtic_roisin* It's so nice to find someone on the same twisted wavelength as I am...
So, I hereby present to y'all:
celtic_roisin: Oh Draco, you need a quickie...
astra_argentea: No thanks, Mudblood, I'm gay.
celtic_roisin: Goddamn it.
astra_argentea: I know you're disappointed. After all, I AM the single most attractive wizard in the country -- Harry Potter aside, of course.
celtic_roisin: But I love yoooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuu. You loved me last night
astra_argentea: You must be mistaken. I know I had a lot to drink, but a Mudblood whore...a FEMALE Mudblood whore? I don't think so
celtic_roisin: *glares* You bitch.
astra_argentea: Me? I'M a bitch? Excuse me for having standards. Malfoys don't just jump in bed with the first slut they meet, you know.
celtic_roisin: Excuse me, but last night you said I was the best you'd ever had....you lying scum.
astra_argentea: Again I assure you that it wasn't me you were with last night.
celtic_roisin: Uh-hum. You seem to clearly remember the radiator...Nw try to remember what was on TOP of the radiator.
astra_argentea: A naked, sweaty Harry Potter. My BOYFRIEND. *glares*
celtic_roisin: *cough* Or so you think *waves polyjuice in front of your face*
astra_argentea: *gasps* No...you didn't...
celtic_roisin: *smirks*
astra_argentea: You...you SLUT! You WHORE! You...you fucking COCKTEASE! ^_~ I can't believe you did that to me!
celtic_roisin: You can fucking talk. I had to pay you back somehow... you dumped me for...HIM!!! A fucking POOF, for God's sake.
astra_argentea: It's obvious you just can't handle that I went off with a poof because I AM ONE!
celtic_roisin: YOU ARE NOT!!! YOU ARE A FUCKING SLYTHERIN! YOU CAN'T BE!
astra_argentea: Half the bloody house are gay! How else would we get our reputation as the school sex gods?!
celtic_roisin: *scowls* Because of people like me...I taught you everything...or was that your fucking Mother, eh? *smirk*
celtic_roisin: Ah, look at the little Malfoy now. He can't even speak, is that right. God, you should be in Hufflepuff.
astra_argentea: Hufflepuff? *dies* It so happens I was talking to your cousin, Mudblood. He's much nicer than you are.
And it was my father, actually, but thanks for asking. ^_~
celtic_roisin: You keep your cock-teasing hands AWAY from my cousin, you bitch. He doesn't need to be fucked senseless by the likes of you...He's no fucking poof...
astra_argentea: He sure as hell acts like one. *smirk*
celtic_roisin: He does not, you fucking dickhead *bitch-slaps you*
astra_argentea: Excuse me, but I think I know a gay man when I see one, thank you very much. Besides, even the straight ones find me attractive...
celtic_roisin: You shut up, you prick. Or else *waves polyjuice at you again*
astra_argentea: I won't fall for it this time, bitch.
astra_argentea: *blinks* How did you get into our house, anyway?
celtic_roisin: *smirks* You fall for everything with a cock. You can't help yourself, can you? Get a fucking clue, whore.
astra_argentea: I'M a whore? ME? I'm not the one who snuck into my house and pretended to be Harry fucking Potter in order to get a shag! You're fucking desperate! Although I can understand your fixation with me. I mean, I AM gorgeous...
celtic_roisin: Fuck off. Mr high-and-mighty, you like like you've been dunked inot a vat of bleach. Hello, look at that hideous lump you call a face. You think that THAT is gorgeous? You need fucking glasses.
astra_argentea: BLEACH? BLEACH??!?!?!?!?! HOW DARE YOU ACCUSE ME OF BLEACHING MY HAIR?!?!?!? I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW I'M A NATURAL BLOND, UNLIKE YOU!!!!!!!!!!11oneoneoneeleven
celtic_roisin: You didn't seem to mind it last night now, did you.
celtic_roisin: In fact, you couldn't get enough of it. You wanted me, and you told me...you remember? Of course not. You are a POOF, of course. You don't remember stuff like that. Fucking Malfoys. Lying cunts, the lot of you.
astra_argentea: I wanted HARRY! Harry's my BOYFRIEND! I remember telling HIM that, you deceitful bitch: I don't think you're in any position to call ME a lying cunt!
celtic_roisin: *sweet smile* I didn't lie, I just didn't tell. But you never questioned me, did you?
celtic_roisin: If yuo know him so well, then how didn't you guess it was me, eh?
astra_argentea: I have sex with Harry regularly enough to see absolutely nothing wrong with shagging him... except, of course, that it was YOU! What kind of dirty fetishes do you have, polyjuicing yourself into a guy? Don't tell me you didn't get off on it, because I was there...
And he'd been out all morning, how was I to know you weren't him? It's not like I love him or anything. *blush*
celtic_roisin: You disgust me...You LOVE him?! You make me sick...and hello, it was a bit hard to get off, seeing as you were trying to fuck me senseless in the process.
astra_argentea: Isn't the point that you wanted to be fucked senseless by me? *raises eyebrow* And I said I DIDN'T love him, idiot, learn to read!
celtic_roisin: Learn to control your emotions, you little fuck. And so what if it was.
astra_argentea: Control MY emotions? I didn't use fucking Polyjuice to get my love interest into bed! How long were you planning this, anyway? That potion isn't exactly quick-brewing! And how did you get any of his hair? *glares* I'm beginning to consider getting a restraining order against you...
celtic_roisin: Oh, so now you want a bed involved as well as a radiator...well, that could be arranged *smirk*
astra_argentea: *smirks* I thought I was no good? I mean, piss off! I still have to think of what to tell Harry...he has to believe that I'd never knowingly *glares* cheat on him... *worries*
celtic_roisin: Awww, look who's wowwying about telling his poor wittle Harry-kins..
astra_argentea: He's NOT my wittle Harry-kins! I don't care about him! I just, um, don't want to jeopardise my reputation as a great lover, that's all... *cough*
celtic_roisin: *pretends to sniff* Well, I'll let you get on and tell your precious little man, shall I? And, for the books, you aren't that good *smirk*
astra_argentea: Ask the REAL Harry. He's had me more ways than you can count. ^_~
celtic_roisin: *walks off* I'd rather not.
Notes: 'You loved me last night' is something celtic_roisin actually said to dk_faerie the other day completely innocently. ^_^ And 'slut', 'whore', 'cocktease' is an in-joke about the film 'American Beauty'. Don't ask. ^_^
BTW, that is actually the chat from start to finish. There was the occasional gtg now *hugs* type comment in brackets which I removed, but other than that...no planning, no nothing; just our strange, strange minds at work. *sighs* Got rid of my insane urge to write smut, though.
*SS*