OMG I SHOULD BE SLEEPING, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Well it's 2:54am and I should be sleeping but I can't. I was talking to Amanda on the phone and at 9:30 I told her I would call her back and I passed out, I woke up at 11 and the phone was gone and someone had takin my shoes off, so I got up and came to the living room and my mom was on the phone with Jessie's mom of course and online, so I talked to her for like 2 seconds was gonna call and say sorry to Amanda, but as soon as I sat back down waiting for my mom to get off the phone I passed out again.. I think stress makes you tired sometimes, I am sooo damn stressed... So I woke up at 2 and I was really thristy which is weird for me to wake up for a drink but I got a drink smoked a cig and laid down, couldn't fall back asleep so then I am about to doze off and my phone rings, errrr... It's Timmy calling to let me know that Brandi came to his house at 5 WITH JEN and gave Timmy some money, OMG did I need to hear that at 2:30 in the morning??? NA, he said ohh she was only here like 2 minutes cause you know Ness hates Jen I said Timmy everyone hates Jen, except Brandi.. He said yeah well they were going to Sebring, probally to get drunk at a bar is what I think.. But anyways yeah now I am up and can't sleep and no one is online at 2:59 shit I wouldn't be.. I don't know why I let these games bother me, I love her that is why but I let her go today and I can't get mad cause she is hanging out with Jen.. It's not that I am mad I am just very very sad... TIME TO GET OVER IT THOUGH!!!!!!!! Anyways I talked to Brandi this morning and told her that we need to just stop, that we don't need to talk anymore... She is upset she said she didn't want it to turn out like this she wanted us together, but I told her that I did but it's fucked up now and we have to let go.. So she said she would respect me and stop calling, she has told me that before though.. I will just have to hold my ground and tell her look I asked you not to call, that's what I meant.. She usually calls when it's in the morning and she starts thinking of me, or when her and Jen fight she calls and says that she don't know why she ever let me go, for that bitch... Shit me either, why did ya let me go for that bitch Bran??? I will never get that answer anyways, I didn't talk to Jonathan today cause he had to work both jobs and then he went out with his friends, I wrote him and told him to enjoy his time and be careful, and to call me when he gets a free minute, which will probally be tomorrow late after work like 10ish, or when he goes home which is shit late late.. 1am or 2am.. I never answer him when he calls that late, that's why I want the summer to hurry because I want to be there partying to hehe.. He is going to be here March 31st- April 3.. There is one good/bad thing bout that, mine and Bran's anni is April 2nd, hehe maybe he will help cause he will keep my mind off of it, but she might call, oh well she got with Jen on Nov 2nd soooo FUCK HER!!! Ok enough about Brandi back to Jonathan yeah so he does some shit I don't like, pills, shurms, and the smoking don't bother me neither does the selling, he drinks sometimes.. He was telling me last night that when I move in he wants to eat shurms, I said why would you do that, he said cause u can have sex for like 8 hours, i'm like that's really nice to no, and I am glad you want to have sex with me for 8 hours, but Ash will be sober and Ash is not having sex for 8 hours why Ash is sober.. hehe.. He is such a cutie he talks about the wildest shit... Well I am going to try and get some sleep... Love ya and miss ya Love Paris/Ash