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[ass_anonymous]

like AA only it's Ass Synonymous. (ref. Xero pg. 68 © La Ruocco 2000)

Ass Anonymous is a fellowship of men & woman who share their experience, strength & hope with each other that they may solve their common problem & help others to recover from ass

Comments

slippery people -- we can choose not to be.

[ccjohn]

The quantum guys talk about an infinity of multiverses, where anything we can imagine is true. Heinlein wrote about it, in one of his last books but it's kind of sad. His characters start running into characters from other guys' books he liked, but you get the sense he knew his time was running out, wanted to do a hat-tip. Or, if you want, he was getting sentimental. But I stay with Socrates: "All I know, is that I don't know anything." See hints in the Bible of some hope in that. "He who would come unto me, must be as a child." Ever wonder if when we were young, and didn't know anything, we were closer then to the truth than we ever could be now?

OK, so we live in this fishbowl that might not even exist, might be a dream, but has hard surfaces you can bash your face on. But sometimes I realize. I go rational on everything. And then I remember ... :) ... to stop trying to hold onto it. Let it all come through me, like rain. Why do I want that Garden of Eden back so, why am I afraid if I ever talk about it? Because I've had my face smashed. But I know what makes me happy. Don't you find -- damn, you are one of the smartest, most subtle people I've ever met -- don't you find it's such a blessing, no longer to be thinking? Sure I'm smiling, in this icon. Yeah, means I'm a creep, and sophomoric. But I am happy. You and I, we know happy, we have been through some hard times lately but I never wonder who I am, when I'm happy, or when I remember happiness, _____ then thinking doesn't matter anymore.

Have decided, myself, the absence of feeling rotten is OK. But just OK. I catch myself, not feeling too bad, and what the hell is that? I think it's the Other Thing. It wants me to remember it.

Belief: no longer think I am capable of it.

Faith: the grace of God. I pretend there is some will about it, there isn't, at rock bottom my will is not worth shit.

Truth: the Greeks had only one word for beauty and truth. The truth used to bully is not truth because the truth cannot be used. It owns us.

I am vigilant. I want to shove my guard down into the ground, you've seen me like that, I want to be that, but right now I'm going behind people's backs to try and make sure they are OK. Solo mission. There is what I have to do. I have to do it. That's it.

Did you see The Dark Knight? Maybe the highest hero. Is the one who lets himself be despised. Because that accomplishes some good for others, that he can't ever really know. When it becomes a problem right in my face, giving up on myself at least for awhile, I hide in myths. They're a help. I know you have truckloads more experience than me with this, may have to ask for some coaching.

Reading about this dead guy I admired, Doug Kenney. P.J. O'Rourke. He carves words pretty good and I'll get you the quote somehow, reminded me of us both I think.