another breakdown
I really pity my boyfriend - he has to live with a psycho. Even though I don't normally allow myself to break down like that with somebody watching.. sometimes it happens, and I can't help it. I'm only happy that he seems to take it well and actually manages to help me.
That feeling of constantly being tired - not being physically weared out or something, but more morally: I need to charge my batteries, but for that I need people.. which I don't have around me.
I actually managed to make more friends in Russia than in Norway in the past 4 years that I'm living here. Heck, a year ago I actually thought it might get better - but now one of my supposed friends left for another country, and other two are two busy with their own stuff to care for some time with me.
Surprisingly enough, it's bloody hard for an antisocial and misanthropic person to make friends. Especially IRL :D And it looks to me like the only thing I can be valued for here is my professional skills. Margopedia, Margo - the IT guru, Margo - the music man.. what about Margo the human being? I only know one person who cares about that in my vicinity, but it's too little for me, that's just how I am. I need to get out sometimes. I need rock'n'roll.
That feeling of constantly being tired - not being physically weared out or something, but more morally: I need to charge my batteries, but for that I need people.. which I don't have around me.
I actually managed to make more friends in Russia than in Norway in the past 4 years that I'm living here. Heck, a year ago I actually thought it might get better - but now one of my supposed friends left for another country, and other two are two busy with their own stuff to care for some time with me.
Surprisingly enough, it's bloody hard for an antisocial and misanthropic person to make friends. Especially IRL :D And it looks to me like the only thing I can be valued for here is my professional skills. Margopedia, Margo - the IT guru, Margo - the music man.. what about Margo the human being? I only know one person who cares about that in my vicinity, but it's too little for me, that's just how I am. I need to get out sometimes. I need rock'n'roll.